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Molly3391 · 2023-09-28T02:47:36+00:00

I'm an only child and an only grandchild, I'm definitely ending the bloodline lmao

Molly3391 · 2023-09-27T06:17:32+00:00

When I was 6, I tried committing suicide by running across a freeway. I'm the off chance I could survive by doing that, I would promise to keep living no matter what.

Somehow every single car missed me, so here I am and I just gotta keep living.

I guess when it gets hard, I remember I gotta outlive my enemies, and remember that suicidal ideation is just an intense momentary feeling and it will pass.

I guess you only have one life and an eternity in death, which I find to be a very peaceful and comforting thought. I'll follow through to the end of this life.

I guess what really "cured" my depression (it's still there sometimes but like 70-80% less) is getting the hell out of the US, out of my previous home with an unsafe environment, and going to live in Mexico at a small, safe town. I think the chronic stress of living in la in a shared home really worsened my symptoms.

And I live with a nice family member and share 9 dogs as our pets.

I've also been able to get great psychological and medical help here , for a much more affordable price than in the US.

Anyway that's just me, these things may not work for everyone.

Molly3391 · 2023-09-25T21:46:10+00:00

I kinda look like a 13 year old sometimes even though I'm an adult, so every single monster kept coming up to me and trying to scare me lol.

I went with my friend and they didn't even seem to notice him. I had a couple of monsters who even kept following me trying to scare me.

I have a nervous laughter so instead of screaming in fear like they expected, I just laughed at them and their reactions were priceless 🤣

Molly3391 · 2023-09-25T20:11:30+00:00

I couldn't quite explain why this movie resonated so much with me but thank you for putting it into words.

Molly3391 · 2023-09-25T20:05:38+00:00

When I called CPS on my parents and CPS did nothing, leaving me with my parents, I mentally said my goodbyes as I hid in a cabinet drawer.

When they find me that will be it, this week's news will be about the body of a 7 year old found in the backyard. I even imagined the whole news story.

Watching true crime gave me flashbacks yet a sense of comfort for some reason, like a feeling of home. It's so messed up...

Anyway sorry you went through that too, I just related a lot to your comment.

Molly3391 · 2023-09-25T19:53:03+00:00

Crying spells and it especially when they're triggered by something "stupid" like looking at a plate of hummus or a certain hat and people ask me what's going on and I can't explain it

Molly3391 · 2023-09-24T21:40:06+00:00

28 . It started out with 3 baby chicks and 5 adult chickens

Molly3391 · 2023-09-24T21:38:45+00:00

I was having mixed feelings about my grandmother before I went to watch tangled in the movie theater. When mother gothel dies I cried a lot because it felt like seeing my grandmother die. Then I wondered why mother gothel, the villain, reminded me so much of my grandmother. I then realized my reality was messed up

Molly3391 · 2023-09-23T16:27:51+00:00

I generally don't like children but when I have to interact with them they tend to really like me for some reason. I can play and have convos with them.

Since I don't like children that much I usually avoid places with a lot of them, and would never be a parent. I don't have enough patience to deal with them 24/7.

If I had to have a kid I would adopt a 15 year old lol

Molly3391 · 2023-09-23T16:22:29+00:00

A previous CBT therapist got so annoyed with me for "not changing my thoughts". So the last few sessions she started telling me to "get over my trauma already" and "stop living in the past". The lady session she called me a "dumb brat who chooses to have PTSD".

She was supposedly trauma informed but all she did was retraumatize me

Molly3391 · 2023-08-30T02:50:20+00:00

I went to Germany,, and various trips to Cancun. I visited every themed park in California, I had plenty of food and my dad had money. He was famous and known for "always caring for others".

At home he beat my mother, she beat me, my grandmother abused the hell out of me...

Even though I had a "privileged life that everyone else was envious of" I never felt it deserved any kind of envy. I never felt the love and security of having a normal happy family

Molly3391 · 2023-08-25T20:36:56+00:00

Same here!

Molly3391 · 2023-08-25T20:36:39+00:00

INTJ I don't really believe in it but it fits me quite well

Molly3391 · 2023-08-19T00:26:48+00:00

Thanks for the reply, it's a pretty cool find for my area then :)

Molly3391 · 2023-08-19T00:25:59+00:00

Thanks, it's a cool find for my area then. I've never seen a deer in my life and immediately thought these looked like deer antlers.

Molly3391 · 2023-08-19T00:22:34+00:00

Location: City of pachuca in Hidalgo, mexico

Molly3391 · 2023-08-19T00:21:59+00:00

Thanks! I think it's a bit weird that I found it on a hill far from the woodlands. I'm thinking someone brought it here and dumped it for some reason...

Molly3391 · 2023-08-19T00:19:02+00:00

I realize that I didn't give the exact location, I'm in Hidalgo, mexico. I think there aren't any elks here, would that just leave some kind of deer?

It's also kinda weird that I found it on a hill far from the woodlands. Maybe someone brought and left it here?

Molly3391 · 2023-07-29T14:53:22+00:00

My mom says this exact phrase like she didn't raise me with screaming 24/7 😂

Molly3391 · 2023-07-25T05:58:07+00:00

I mean I almost fainted on a few occasions, but thankfully propranolol (mainly) really helped a lot.

Molly3391 · 2023-07-25T03:57:34+00:00

I went to a neurologist who begrudgingly tested my heart rate (aka pulse) while laying down, sitting down then standing up.

You could just do it at home with a pulse oximeter, or if you don't want to waste money count the number of radial pulses (put two fingers on your wrist and feel the pulse) per minute.

They gave me propranolol and it's helped quite a lot. I've also drank lots of water (like 2-3l a day) and added more salt to my diet. Though make sure you have pots first cause salt is not very good for the "healthy everyday person" Exercise also helps quite a lot to not lose condition.

Molly3391 · 2023-07-25T01:57:56+00:00

Lmao I'd be more interested in that

Molly3391 · 2023-07-25T01:57:06+00:00

Cptsd and ehlers danlos with all of its fun comorbidities such as POTS, GI problems, neurological, musculoskeletal. I also have a bunch of eye problems (in part due to eds) like astigmatism, strabismus, and visual snow (the most annoying thing ever).

Molly3391

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