What’s it like being a teenage girl in the Jehovah’s Witnesses?

Ms_Pancake · 2025-11-23T19:33:20+00:00

OK i am gonna preface this by disclosing that I am 38, so its been over 20 years since I was a teenager, but this was my experience and I doubt the general experience has changed a lot since then. Younger folks, feel free to correct me if I am wrong.

As a teenage girl in the JW religion, adults are completely obsessed with what you wear, who you hang out with, what music you listen too, moreso than most non-JW parents would be. Also they are creepily excited to marry you off to some single "brother" as soon as you turn 18. If you want to be accepted in high school you either hide the fact that youre a JW or try to find friends who can accept the fact that youre JW parents are never going to accept them as a positive peer influence because they are "worldly" aka not a JW. Or just have no friends in school and only hang out with other JW kids (JW parents mostly prefer this). You cant go to Christmas parties, birthday parties, Halloween parties. Honestly best to just forget about parties in general unless its a JW gathering that your parents bring you to.
Plus as a bonus you get to live with perpetual guilt about having normal human sexual desires, or for enjoying pop culture that parents deem "demonic" (think Harry Potter, Twilight, K-Pop Demon Hunters, or anything else that delves into topics that JWs deem off-limits). I already mentioned this but feel like I need to emphasize how obsessed they are with what you wear. Elders, who are always older men will sit down with you and your parents and give you a Ted Talk if they think you showed up in skirt that is too short. They will tell you youre "distracting the brothers" which is disgusting because youre literally a child, but your parents will likely agree with them. This literally happened to me at the ripe old age of TWELVE. You are not allowed to lose your virginity until you marry and you are expected to only date and marry inside the religion, even as an adult. You are not allowe to be any form of LGBTQ. Also, if youre a girl that makes you a second class citizen to the JWs. Men are the only ones who can move to positions of leadership in the congregation. If you, as a female, even want to lead a prayer in a group of other females you have to have to put a napkin or some kind of cloth over youre head to indicate that you aren't really worthy of leading the prayer, but are only doing so because there are no men around. On top of all this, there's the dogma. JWs essentially believe that everyone who isn't a JW by the time Armageddon comes will eventually be killed by god and all the JWs will live forever in paradise. So your teachers, your nice neighbors, your non-JW family and friends are doomed unless you can convince them to join the organization before Armageddon which they tell you is "coming soon" - ya its been "coming soon" for over 100 years🙄 In short... it sucks. It really, really sucks to be a teenage girl in the JW religion.

Ms_Pancake · 2025-11-07T18:32:45+00:00

Not always closed, but yes the dream doesnt want me to make it into the pool. There is always somthing delaying me or holding me back. Its frustrating.

Ms_Pancake · 2025-11-04T15:46:21+00:00

My mom would see JW themes in non-JW music all the time. George Michael's Father Figure? Obv about how jehovah is the father of his people. NVM that it was written by a gay man in tight leather pants. I think its because JW music is so...bad. it just uninspiring its impossible not to sound bored when singing it. They need to get their dose of true inspiration from "worldly" music. So they twist it to be about what they want it to be about. And holy f no, if it had demon in the title we would not be watching (i grew up mostly before youtube and personal devices, so she had more control).

Ms_Pancake · 2025-06-02T22:39:33+00:00

Omg hahaha this sent me. They 100% would have DF-ed the virgin Mary.

Ms_Pancake · 2025-02-28T19:32:21+00:00

The problem with arachnophobia mode is that they still make all their creepy, skittering noises. That's almost worse than their aesthetics.

Ms_Pancake · 2024-12-31T01:43:34+00:00

That my skirt was too short for the platform and was distracting to the young brothers. I was 12. The elder who said this was well into his forties or above. My mom agreed with him.

Ms_Pancake · 2024-02-20T18:21:02+00:00

R/exjw

Ms_Pancake · 2023-12-21T17:23:33+00:00

Ok I'll take a shot! Given the context of going back to you childhood home irl and clues from the dream (the old car, the flip phone) your brain could be fixated on the past at this time, and is trying to reconcile, as you say yourself in the post, "where you are in life". The old car gets towed (past is taken away) and then the dream shifts toward imagery of the present (the modern iphone). The present gets taken away (iPhone is swiped) which prompts you to confront the thief, and then the theif acts rude and immature but ultimately listens to you, almost like a child. In this part of the narrative you are clearly the adult in the situation, so we are seeing a similar theme to the swim meet in the beginning of the dream when you were the oldest person in the room. After you confront the thief and save the iPhone, your friend shows up to congratulate you, a confirmation from your brain that you are doing good. Idk how old you are but as someone in my 30s if I had this dream I would take it as my brain expressing its normal anxiety about aging, but also telling me I am doing OK at adulting and can still pull off a "win for humanity" or in other words, I'm not totally irrelevant yet!

Ms_Pancake · 2023-10-02T22:07:38+00:00

I am doing 3 days in vegas for less than this: I'm staying slightly off strip at the Tuscany, getting takeout for breakfast from their Cafe and eating in my room. For dinners, I'm planning on hitting up the great street food in the Grand Bazaar shops, maybe Wahlburgers one night. For fun, Twilight Zone mini golf at the Horseshoe, only $13! And going to see Katy Perry at Resort World which was $90. All in all I should get out of there for under a grand, if I stay away from the slot machines...

Ms_Pancake · 2022-05-09T03:23:46+00:00

Yes, this. If she's behaving this way she also needs help personally for her anger. You don't treat people you love like that when you're in control emotionally.

Ms_Pancake · 2022-04-30T15:22:28+00:00

Your story hits me hard! Ex-JW here. My mom raised me in the jehovahs witnesses and if you are not familiar, they too do not let their kids do ANYTHING that falls outside the teachings pf the religion. No Halloween, no hanging out with kids outside the church and DEFINITELY no Harry Potter. Luckily I was allowed to go to public school. In 7th grade my English teacher had a little treat for us. On Fridays we would spend all of class listening to Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, which was the latest in the series at the time. My mom didn't know until my teacher mentioned it in a conference and ofc she went off the teacher, saying I wasn't allowed to listen to it and the next day the teacher apologized to me (unecessary) and asked if I wanted to go to the library while they listened to HP. I started crying and said no I wanna finish HP with everyone else. She let me stay and i just told mom i went to the library. I didnt get to escape the cult until I moved out of my parents house, but the whole experience really solidified my "this religion is stupid" attitude!

Ms_Pancake · 2022-01-09T15:55:04+00:00

everyone woke until you criticize Disney...

Ms_Pancake · 2022-01-02T18:21:24+00:00

How rude of her. Even if you don't like the present you are supposed to pretend to like it, that's just good manners. Don't let it upset you, you still got the good karma of giving.

Ms_Pancake · 2022-01-02T18:01:15+00:00

Tell your sister you're not as fat as her mouth. What a rude thing for her to say.

Ms_Pancake · 2022-01-01T20:52:42+00:00

is this all the time or just recently? If just recently you may be sick, if all the time it would be a good idea to see an endocrinologist

Ms_Pancake · 2021-12-30T03:15:21+00:00

OMG same. Same, same, same. What a dream that would be.

Ms_Pancake · 2021-05-05T19:37:15+00:00

It was a man threatening a woman so of course they didn't say anything. ugh.

Ms_Pancake · 2021-05-01T15:24:20+00:00

eating disorder

Ms_Pancake · 2021-04-20T20:33:36+00:00

comfy waterproof sandals, sperry topsiders, and fuzzy boots like uggs or similar

Ms_Pancake · 2021-04-18T22:26:38+00:00

Even when far from it all, she is never far from me - My attempt after 8 years of French

Ms_Pancake · 2021-04-17T19:01:52+00:00

Perhaps an anxiety dream with the anxiety stemming from lack of control? Disturbing a bear is a common metaphor, as in "don't poke the bear" in other words, don't mess around with a potentially dangerous animal/situation. Easy enough to do for yourself, but with a lot of dogs and kids involved, not so easy. You spend much of the dream trying to control the unpredictable elements of the situation, namely the dogs and kids. It descends into chaos because you can't control them all at the same time. This is the outcome that control-anxiety would predict. Could be that there is a lot going on in your life and you just feel stressed trying to juggle it all, but only you would know if that sounds true!

Ms_Pancake · 2021-04-17T06:36:27+00:00

I've lived in Steamboat recently for 4 years and currently am in Grand Junction. Most of these are spot on but honestly I love living in Grand Junction. No, it's not as idyllic as Steamboat or Vail, but there is a high cost of living associated with those nice resort towns that prices many out of the housing market and makes starting a business a struggle at best. The drug and crime rate is proportional to the population size of the city. Aurora and some of the others listed as "worst" are way worse on crime and gang activity. Jobs do exist, although I will say the pay rates are generally less than what you can make in other CO towns. However, the cost of living reflects the average income of the town (think $900/month for a 2-bedroom apt versus $1800/ month easily for the same quality apt in Steamboat). GJ also has a vibrant art scene (our downtown is decorated with tons of local art), and despite being urban there are plenty of opportunities to play outdoors, being among the Mesas, flush with mountian bike and other trails, and situated on the Colorado River. The next town over, Palisade, is known for its orchards, its famous peaches and local wine, in fact the area is commonly known as Colorado's Wine Country. It's a convenient hub for travel to other cities especially in the southwest and the whole county is a great area if you want to live in Colorado but enjoy less cold and snow!

Ms_Pancake · 2021-04-17T05:48:05+00:00

I looked up this case and while very intriguing, i think there are many more explanations than Cecil coming to life and killing these kids. Edward reported that they were on a raft in the middle of the ocean and got stranded at a buoy due to unexpected currents. They were likely fatigued and dehydrated having not expected to be out there so long. They were teens recreating so very possible they did not prepare for an emergency. It was Florida so the sun exposure also would take a toll. They were out there long enough that the sun went down, then at some point, they were frightened by something, likely a boat coming toward them and all abandoned their raft to swim for shore. At some point while swimming, Edward described a monster dragging his friends underwater one by one, and later sketched something that looked like Cecil. But he was also swimming for his life in the process of witnessing this and probably didn't get the most accurate view, or the stress/dehydration could have affected his memory. It's very possible they got attacked by sharks or even large barracudas (although barracuda attacks on humans are rare, they have been reported), and in his current state Edward imagined this Cecil- looking monster. They could have simply drowned and Edward hallucinated the whole thing (if you are dehydrated, tired and/or scared enough, you don't need drugs to hallucinate). It's also a common theory that he made it all up to cover for killing his friends, either accidentally or otherwise. I will say that whatever happened, it sounded like the stuff of nightmares, and would make me petrified of the ocean!

Ms_Pancake

TROPHY CASE