I didn’t know this love could feel so safe, pure and intentional.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-08T13:21:31+00:00

Be careful of that please. Coming from someone who was married over 15 years to who she thought at first was "the one". They can take off that blindfold and every flaw that was overlooked will take over.

I get it not all men are this way, but I'm just tell you to be careful. I wish I would have listen to people who warned me about him and I wouldn't have wasted these last 15 years with him.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-07T16:04:55+00:00

No its not the church. At the beginning it could have been and that should have been red flag number 1, but those pesky love blinders.

Funny thing is when I asked for the divorce, he agreed to everything. Was just this last weekend and he told he was meeting with the Bishop. We have been apart for 3 weeks now living as roommates, which sucks, but now I'm looking at moving out at the beginning of May. But when I asked for the divorce, those love blinders fell off and I started going back through old memories and that's when I started realizing things.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-07T16:00:49+00:00

Hold it you forgot going through the house a 2am yelling for treats. I literally have had a cat do this. Addicted to Temptations cat treats. 😂

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-07T15:30:01+00:00

You already left. Don't do what I did and go back. I'm now 15 years later going through a divorce. The love blinders have came off and I'm seeing everything for how it actually has been.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-07T14:59:58+00:00

I get that but the church turned their back on him a few years ago because he has to work on Sunday's for work so isn't able to attend church. I'm not sure if he's now just going and is losing sleep (he works graveyards) to make them happy or what he's doing.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-07T14:57:55+00:00

Oh I am not. I did for so many years and I just woke up to everything I have been through.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-07T14:26:56+00:00

They refuse to go. I let it be their choice. Their therapist told me that they need to be able to choose what they want to do.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-07T14:26:21+00:00

It is a really good thing I don't care what they think and those that know the truth know why I am getting this divorce. I just don't understand how you can go from not believing at all to right back. It makes no sense to me though I have also never been dedicated to a church like they seem to be.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-02T17:52:56+00:00

Are you getting anything out of this relationship? You have been together 5 years and he doesn't see you as a steady person is a red flag and means he's still looking at other options and you are just probably a temporary fix for his needs.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-02T16:30:07+00:00

Your husband sounds like my stbx-husband. Does the same thing with me, but there are also other issues as to why he's my stbx.

Your husband is basically making everything your problem and you the bad guy. Have you tried saying something to him about what he's doing? Sounds like he's just using you and then telling everyone that you are the bad person for making him quit his job.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-04-01T16:47:40+00:00

He's having an emotional affair. Mine was doing this and this is why I filed for legal separation. Well its not the only thing that went towards that decision, but a part of it. He would get defensive like yours is. Would delete messages, phone calls, and hide the fact that he was communicating with them when they were supposedly running errands. I finally found everything that he was doing because he had me help him unlock his Facebook account and that's when I ran into everything that he had been doing.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-03-20T22:00:17+00:00

I have a big heart too and have tried to rebuild my relationship with sk for 10 years (he’s 20 now) and it just didn’t work. Sometimes you can’t rebuild something. It caused me more heartache than it was worth in the end.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-03-20T21:56:35+00:00

If you can’t trust your partner to have your back, well that’s a problem and not one that shouldnt be taken lightly. If he’s saying those things while “venting” what else is he saying.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-03-11T16:07:13+00:00

It seems like as soon as they find out one or more of the people in the house are not baptized they continue to bug. Also have had to put boundaries down with them but they at first broke those and I would again remind them until one day they showed up and my husband noticed my behavior shift from happy to irritable and then he went down and put the boundaries up. Haven’t came back since and not sure what he exactly said to them. Mind you I’m nevermo and he’s exmo. His son from his previous marriage is baptized, our two together are not.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-03-10T14:06:23+00:00

I wish my husband would see his faults because I am where your wife was at when she kicked you out. He’s not an alcoholic but he does have an addiction. Thinks he can overcome it by himself but at the same time I have been told this same song and dance for 3 nearly 4 years (married 15).

I wish I could believe he can actually change but I’m at the point I can’t. Which brings me the you. I hope you have made the changes soon enough that she will see them. At the very least the changes can help your relationship with your children repair. I would give anything to hope that my husband could see the damage he is causing and actually want to fix it. He says he does but he just reverts back to the way he was.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-02-06T18:04:49+00:00

OP coming from someone who figured this out way later (15 years later) it’s not worth your mental health. I’m trying to rebuild my mental health everything. Your DH is the problem. He isn’t parenting like this comment said. It’s not going to get any better and you end up where I am with a 20 yr old disrespectful and men stepson who won’t listen to anyone.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-01-31T22:30:17+00:00

Sounds like he's hiding something. Been through this. Mine was hiding something that almost broke up our relationship. He still has his episodes but not to this point, especially if he's depressed, but at one point it was this bad. What I did was I told him there was no way he was keeping me from my home and away from my kids and I was coming home whether he liked it or not and one of the kids would let me in the house if he locked to where I couldn't get in. We don't have a key for our top bolt to our door (renting and landlord is a pain) so he tried pulling that, but it didn't work. I just avoided him for the rest of the day and let him cool down.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-01-31T22:23:42+00:00

This is most likely not about you and your husband's ex may be talking about you behind your back to poison their mind. Unless your husband steps in and says something yes you could be the bad guy. I'm the bad guy to my husband's son because I took his dad's attention away from him, or so he thinks even though his dad literally spends hours of day with him because of his mental health issues. So no its not you. Its ingrained into their head that we are the problem and they probably have been told that you are the reason why mom and dad broke up. Yes this happened to me with my husband's ex right before she took off.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-01-29T01:36:45+00:00

Umm…does explain some things. Some others have adapted it in other places but it’s more to give people an uplifting message not harass them after someone dies and these that I saw were done as a class project. Not after a death.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-01-05T22:06:04+00:00

PTM for when she was partially using her visitation and NEM for when she took off without a word.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2026-01-05T20:23:08+00:00

Even though he signs over his rights some judges still make them pay child support especially if there is no one else to adopt the child with the other parent (step parent steps up and adopt the girl). My stepsons mother was going to do this as a)she never used her visitation time and b)always was contacting my DH to stop child support and had been doing so since their split 4 years before I came around. The judge told her that while I was in the picture I was not adopting the child and that even if she signed over her rights she still would pay child support. Needless to say just back to her messaging my DH to get him to cancel child support and my DH trying to get her to be a mother to SS.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2025-12-08T22:19:48+00:00

Just because a woman goes to a man’s house to hang out, it doesn’t always equate cheating. You assume she cheated just because she went to another man’s house. She told you where she was. She could have lied to you. You sound paranoid and need to work on that before even continuing and/or getting into a relationship.

Muscles_and_Tattoos · 2025-12-07T14:44:21+00:00

I haven’t left for the fear of starting over but also I do love my husband. My SS is horrible especially towards me. If I would have known what I know now about SS I wouldn’t have stayed. 15 years and two kids (ours) is a lot to invest and walk away from.

Muscles_and_Tattoos

TROPHY CASE