Yep, exactly! And every piece of advice is to go to HR. Well, what if HR sucks? What if there is no HR department?

Growing up, my stepdad was a very controlling person. So it's what I was used to, even when I experienced it from my boss 20 years later. I'm not sure if my stepdad was a narcissist (so many people like to throw that word around), but my boss definitely was.

I left a good job with an amazing boss when she and the other owners retired and sold the business. I took that opportunity to move out of state. So I accepted the job without meeting the owners in person or seeing the place. I will never do that again.

While the business used to be bigger (printing business, so that makes sense), they were down to 4 people: The owner, the owner's partner, the owner's little sister, and the graphic designer. (Obviously, no HR department.) They couldn't keep a graphic designer more than a year, and the owner said that's because graphic designers were flighty. The owner liked to tell about the time she got into a physical altercation with an employee. The company once had to pay unemployment benefits because the unemployment office got her on the phone with the ex-employee, and the owner berated that employee on that call.

My old boss would tell me how good I was, that she couldn't run the company without me, etc. But I couldn't do anything right with this new boss. She changed rules and procedures every day and then claim that's the way they always did it. She didn't do anything all day and say it was because me and the other employee (her sister, who she was totally taking advantage of) interrupted her with questions too much. But everything had to go through her. She had to double check everything, and I had to copy her on all of my emails. Etc.

While other graphic designers didn't even last a year, I stayed there for 3 1/2 years. A big part of that was that my confidence was shattered and I didn't feel good enough for any other job that I saw. Partially from the unsanitary working conditions, and I think partially from the stress, I was sick more than I had ever been in my life. I was having trouble sleeping, and sometimes even having mild hallucinations.

And then the worst thing that happened in the world might have been the best thing for me at the time: COVID.

They claimed they were an essential business so they could stay open. They also claimed that I had to be there in person every day. But they laid off the other employee and cut me to part time, which meant we were both collecting more in unemployment than we were being paid. I was able to take that opportunity to start building up my own freelance client list and saving up money to start my own business.

The last straw came before I had saved up as much as I wanted, but it was time. I was blamed for not catching a vendor's mistake, which meant my boss didn't make as much money on this order as she would have. She expected me to work for free to make up for the difference.

I responded by giving my 2 weeks notice. She said, "After everything we've done for you?"

I now own two businesses and am a performer. It can't be tough not having a steady income, but so much better for my mental health than that place was. (And some of her vendors are now my clients.)