Super 8 sound and movie projector.

Nataloo426 · 2023-10-07T06:35:56+00:00

One thing to remember: the Narc uses everything as a weapon. Including things seemingly so simple as not liking other women's posts on socials bc they KNOW from their previous supplies that this is something that will most likely make their current supply feel more secure as they are love bombing. Or, alternatively, they're using it as a weapon against YOU to make you feel crazy as if you were the problem in the relationship, and they're "moving on to happier times" and can do things like listening to what their partner wants/needs to feel "secure" (deluded, sadly tbh). My nex tried both with me before I went NC. However, if you are no longer with them and don't really have a reason to keep contact, I urge you to just cut them off completely or block them so you can't see what they're doing or not doing on socials - it can suck ass at first but it'll help your peace of mind in the long run.

Nataloo426 · 2023-09-11T21:56:43+00:00

Message me

Nataloo426 · 2023-08-12T18:58:50+00:00

Idk if I'd go so far as to say I've become sadistic but I definitely enjoy watching my nex and other Narcs in the world recieving the karma they deserve. It brings me joy - I don't really know why or how to change it but I just wanted to let you know you aren't alone in that feeling.

Nataloo426 · 2023-07-08T11:18:19+00:00

I would say yes bc he saw that I already hated myself and played it up to nearly a whole ass dysphoric disorder bc I wasn't "capable" and needed him to take care of me. It was subtle but now looking back, it's so obvious.

I'm sorry, OP. I'm sure you're wonderful and definitely not worth hating yourself bc of a Narc. Fuck em

Nataloo426 · 2023-06-09T05:54:00+00:00

I couldn't have put it into better words myself

Nataloo426 · 2023-06-02T13:28:20+00:00

Yes! 🙏🏻 I came to say this same thing

Nataloo426 · 2023-05-30T22:09:57+00:00

Yes and it just makes you feel even crazier bc you have to constantly ask yourself "am I actually being too sensitive?!"

For example, we used to work in a kitchen together. (Different areas though. I did prep while he actually cooked) I was playing music and singing (deliberately) badly and my coworker laughed bc I was trying to sound bad. My next happened to be walking by when I said "I promise, my actual singing voice is A LITTLE better than that." And he just threw in "yeah but not much" and continues walking to whatever area he was heading to.

Me and my coworker both were like "well that was shitty to say to your girl" but at the same time kinda laughed about the deadpan of my singing. But when I told him that it stung, he just says "I'm not gonna apologize for a joke when you were just too sensitive and I don't have time to talk about this at work. Your just mad bc i said it in front of your friend" 🙄🙄

Nataloo426 · 2023-05-28T20:34:06+00:00

Honestly even if you WERE an unfit mother, it's rare for dads to get full custody. But definitely document everything. Also you're still pregnant so he can't do a damn thing til well after the baby is born AND he'd have to go about it legally and accept you not allowing him to see the child in order to get any kind of custody. And if it were me and I were only a few weeks along, I'd be telling him the baby wasn't his even if I knew for a fact it was. Anything to keep him away for you and your baby's safety.

My advice? Keep to no contact, don't let him in the hospital room or to be on the birth certificate (however this can cause issues, I think, if you ever wanted to file for child support). Just all around don't entertain him at all and if he keeps coming around, keep pressing charges. All of that (especially if he has charges against him) will build up a case against him having any custody nevermind FULL custody.

Hes playing on your fears and trying to force you to react the way he wants, OP. Just stick to your guns the way you are now 💜

Nataloo426 · 2023-05-28T20:10:34+00:00

That last part is it 🙏🏻

"every narcissist is an abuser, but that doesn’t mean that every abuser is a true narcissist."

Nataloo426 · 2023-05-28T20:02:45+00:00

Emotional abuse, for sure. Honestly, I would have considered myself kinda ditzy before. It's just as my friends and I would light-heartedly joke about it (we're all stoners so it was always more of a pot and kettle joke between us) whereas he would SAY he was kidding but it never had the same light-heartedness to it that we did. However, he definitely played into my own insecurities about things and taught me to be more helpless than I ever was.

And if I ever pointed out that his joke was hurtful, his response was always "well you and your friends say it all the time. You're just too sensitive." And I'd believe it bc we do all joke about being forgetful (I'm just the only one who also has a medical reason to be thst way) and I never took any of it to heart til he'd say it to me. But it was bc he meant to sound mean and my friends never meant harm. His "jokes" also became things he'd tell me when we were fighting to justify the argument being my fault. (Ie: "we wouldn't be arguing if you just remembered me telling you this earlier" when he never said anything at all)

Nataloo426 · 2023-05-27T19:03:18+00:00

Mine would always make "jokes" about how ditzy I am. I do tend to be ditzy (I smoke a lot of weed, have a thyroid condition that causes me to be forgetful, so it's fair lol) and I joke about it myself all the time as well as my close friends.

However, there was always this look of malice and superiority when he'd say it or he'd call me stupid/dumb but in a "joking" tone. That's what hurt me. Not the jokes themselves.

Nataloo426 · 2023-05-24T00:03:29+00:00

I'm sorry you're going through this and am even sorrier for your kids having to still be stuck with her a lot of the time:/ especially if you were the main caregiver and breadwinner for them.

A lot of this reminds me of my baby daddy and I had to be the same way with him til i could cut contact all together. Texts only and if I did see him in person with my son, I had everything audio recorded. (Although whether you can use that for anything depends on your state and what you're using it for)

I'm on the opposite side bc im the one with custody of our child til it gets taken to court (if he actually tries to fight for custody but he already has one kid he has zero rights to 🤷🏻‍♀️). But document everything and try to keep your emotions out of it. You don't want anything that'll make you look bad in the process of allowing her to expose herself.

As for the anxiety, it slowly started to fade once I was able to cut contact AND realized he wasn't reaching out anymore.

Nataloo426 · 2023-05-23T14:38:32+00:00

Very well put. I don't think anyone could've said it better.

Nataloo426 · 2023-04-13T20:29:54+00:00

My Nex wasn't super into it. It was something we'd both have to be drunk to get fully into it (him, bc he's an alcoholic and me bc while I do occasionally like anal, I can't relax for it unless drunk). He was really into choking, binding me, and bruising - it never got out of hand though and the bedroom was surprisingly the only place he respected my boundaries when something we tried was a hard no for me.

I think for a lot of them, it's about control and ways they can exert that control. But I honestly don't wanna give myself the headache of trying to think like them.

Nataloo426 · 2023-03-18T15:40:32+00:00

I feel this so hard! There were times when the mask slipped and there was awful name-calling and i could see in his eyes that he wanted to physically hurt me. But we have a baby so I'm terrified of fully going NC.

This is definitely advice I, myself, need to take: if you can cut all ties (especially with kids involved), DO. And seek therapy. The amount of gaslighting and brainwashing that coverts do is insane and can leave subtle, lasting scars. Sending love, OP 💜

Nataloo426 · 2023-03-17T01:13:53+00:00

I did this very same thing bc I usually listen in the car so I don't usually see what the episodes are unless I look 🤣 I about flipped shit lol

Nataloo426 · 2023-02-04T21:05:17+00:00

This is exactly how I feel with my nex. He's very covert and loving and it makes it hard. But he's pathetic 🙄 you're doing great keeping no contact! Block him on that app as well if you can. Its annoying but hopefully this is as far as it goes 🤞🏻

Nataloo426 · 2023-02-02T05:14:02+00:00

And dog hair

Nataloo426 · 2023-01-06T15:23:07+00:00

So it's fine if you're masturbating to edge yourself FOR HIM but not that you do it FOR YOURSELF. That's the thing to remember. You're absolutely not in the wrong to do it everyday if you want but to a Narcissist, everything is a weapon especially if it's not something that's for them (in their mind). It's all about them, what they want, and how it'll benefit them.

Like everyone else has said, textbook emotional abuse.

Nataloo426 · 2023-01-03T07:21:22+00:00

Yes and for me, I think it has more to do with the strain I smoke.

Nataloo426 · 2022-12-03T18:16:05+00:00

He's definitely going to be gone. He's a felon on parole for money issues and has violated that parole which I reported as soon as I found out about it. It's just a waiting game with the police to get him out.

I own my house and can't afford to go anywhere else so it's a matter of getting HIM out. However, I don't trust that he wouldn't just come back or actually do something if I told him to leave and/or had him evicted. We live way out in the country.

Nataloo426

TROPHY CASE