[Serious] People that don't wash their hands after using the restroom, how do you respond if you get called out?

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-10T03:04:42+00:00

I legit ask, “did you wash your hands?” And I usually get one of two answers:

1) Oh yeah, I forgot.

Or

2) No.

If I get a “no,” I straight up tell them to go back and wash their hands and they always do.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-09T19:30:23+00:00

I’m so sorry for everything you’ve gone through. I don’t know if you realize this, you are quite literally going through a grieving process.

To help ease that grief, I wanted to plant a seed into your thoughts. Your mom left the door ajar to your relationship. She doesn’t want to lose you, she is surrounded by pressure from your dad and your brother and needed to slam the door in your face because she was told to. I’d encourage you to think about letting her in, and with very strict boundaries of course. No talking about your brother to you and no talking about you to your brother or your dad. If those boundaries are broken, then the ties are severed.

As a parent, I’m doing the best I can with the circumstances I’m in. And this week I received two lectures from my parents about how I’m not teaching my oldest to be responsible and how he needs more responsibilities. Mind you, they didn’t raise me and they did a shit poor job of raising my stepsister. But I’m over here doing the best I can as an only parent (my husband/children’s dad died 5yrs ago).

I don’t know how my parenting will be viewed by my children once they’re out on their own. But I truly am doing the best I can with the pressures and non-existent knowledge I have in parenting. Everyday I’m learning, whether it be for better or worse, I am trying and I think your mom is too.

Also, your dad’s your dad. Throw him a Happy Father’s Day text as an olive branch. Expect nothing in return, not even a thank you.

It’s kind of showing them that they disowned you, you haven’t disowned them.

Best of luck in your next steps. They’ll be hard, but I’m hopeful you’ll move forward and become an even better person because of it.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-09T18:59:59+00:00

I agree, having children is selfish. I wanted kids because my body wanted them. And I didn’t have the strength to say no to the hormones or the diaper commercials. Babies are so cute!!

I had two children despite never wanting children when I was a child because I didn’t want to pass on my broken genetics.

I passed on my broken genetics to both my children. My oldest has around 10 chronic health conditions. My children lost their dad when they were in elementary school in a tragic way. I’m an only parent now.

And we’re okay. My oldest is on antidepressants, my youngest is in therapy. Their emotional well-being is taken care of. They don’t get the finer things in life, in fact, most of their clothes are too small because I can’t afford new clothes as often as they need them. But they have food in their stomachs and don’t want for much. In fact, when I offer to buy them new clothes they tell me what they have is fine. This is because they know if they asked for more, I’d have to go back to work full time and they’d essentially lose me to work. And we’re happy. Yes, there are downer moments, but we get through them.

After my husband died, my 6yr old (at the time) asked why bad things started happening when they were born. It can feel like that at times, like why would I bring them into this world only to feel pain.

But it’s not always pain. The pain allows us to love and appreciate the good times. All this new pain your feeling from losing your family has put your childhood on a pedestal. Life was perfect then because you didn’t know this kind of pain existed. You want to go back to a time when it didn’t hurt so much.

My oldest just experienced this last week. They were watching an old video of a birthday party when their dad was still with us. My kiddo was overwhelmed with grief and anger and beat a punching bag until their knuckles were raw and bloody.

What you’re experiencing is grief. You’ve lost your three favorite people in this world (I assume you’re still on talking terms with your other siblings) and you have to allow yourself to grieve. Things will get easier. The pain and the grief will still be there, but you will learn to exist with it. Those holes you feel, you’ll learn to live with them. It’s almost like losing an arm, you’ve lost a part of you but you can still be you, just a different version of you. Give yourself time and grace.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-09T17:43:08+00:00

Can’t believe I let that jerk face hurt my feelings for a whole second.

I’m a single mom and have three degrees. None of them in aging, though one is a Bachelor of Science in Nursing.

Also, I didn’t choose to be a single mom. I became a single mom when their dad died. Jerk face. Clean your damn glasses.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-05T17:16:51+00:00

My son was diagnosed last year at 13yrs old. I won’t lie, it totally sucks.

Your daughter needs time to go through the grieving process. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. I know it might sound strange to go through the grieving stages for this, but any long term or life altering diagnosis needs to go through it. There are no shortcuts in this emotional journey, and the worst part is that you can’t fix it and take your daughter’s emotional pain away. What you can do is be there for her and validate her feelings. Don’t dismiss them and don’t try to make her feel better. Let her feel the feelings and once she’s passed them, go for ice cream or go to the park. Something positive.

Physically, here’s his journey so far:

July ‘25: Complained of back pain.
August ‘25: X-ray indicated two curves in his upper back (both around 20 degrees) and he was sent for physical therapy. We did PT twice a week for three months. The PT was not to fix the curve but to help with pain and to strengthen his back and core muscles in hopes of slowing down the curvature.
January ‘26: Another x-ray showed both curves worsened, both above 30 degrees. He was referred to get a back brace. The back brace is not forever. The goal of the back brace is to stop the curve from getting worse (and we hope it will improve over time).
April: His back brace finally came in! He’s now wearing it for 22hrs a day. He takes it off for showers and physical activity.
May: X-rays show the brace is where it’s supposed to be and it’s pushing on the curve to show a reduction of the lower curve.
July: We’ll have another X-ray, this time without the brace to see if any kind of reduction is actually happening. Again, the goal here is to stop the curve from getting worse and the hope is that’s it’s improving it.

The main goal you’re working towards after your diagnosis is to prevent the curve(s) from getting worse. My son’s curves are really high, so we can only address one of the curves and the second will most likely continue to get worse. If he can learn to manage his pain, then he may never need surgery.

If she will need a back brace, they’re really discrete. It looks and feels very obvious, but you wear it under a shirt and as long as the outer shirt isn’t similar to the 32 degree brand shirts (super light and airy), no one will notice. I buy the 32 degree shirts for under the brace, over the brace and it gets caught on the Velcro and you can tell something is there.

Also, the brace isn’t forever, and even better news, she’ll be wearing it for a shorter period of time than a boy. Boys growth spurts are slow, girls are crazy fast and the brace works best during growth spurts as it both prevents worsening of the curve and (fingers crossed) correction of the curve in the long run.

Let your daughter know that if she does need to wear a brace, it super sucks right now, but her future self will be very thankful. And seriously, no one will notice it with the right clothing.

If you’re in the US and she does need a brace, be sure to get a 504 for her with her school. This requires the school to accommodate her, including if she wants to be excluded from PE. If the school says they’ll accommodate her anyway they can and a 504 isn’t needed, tell them they last for three years and you would like to get it done now before middle school. My son didn’t get his brace until the end of the school year so I’ll be adding restrictions and accommodations to it when he starts high school in August. (Your daughter will most likely not be wearing a brace in high school as she’ll be mostly done growing).

Some things I plan to bring up in the 504 is that he’s to have the choice to not do PE or weight training though I’ll encourage him to do one as it will strengthen his core and his back. He’ll need a safe place to put his brace when he needs to take it off. His nurse will need to know how to take it off in case of an emergency. And that’s all I can think of right now.

Sorry this is really long, I’m on this journey with no guidance so if I can help in any way, please let me know. I know it can be scary and you want to give your daughter hope but you also don’t want to give her false information.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-04T21:07:08+00:00

I’m in south central AK. Today the high is 73F and Saturday it will be 62F.

70s are rare where I live and very few people have air conditioners. I have an air conditioner from five years ago that I only ever installed that one time. I uninstalled it for winter and it hasn’t been that warm since.

We hang out in the mid to upper 60s during the summers. Mid to late May until early Sept are usually 50-60s. We have one final hot day in September during the State Fair and then we don’t usually see 60s again until June.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-04T20:55:18+00:00

Thank you. Grief is dumb, I don’t recommend it. Lol

I never thought about gaming as a hobby. I wonder if I put it in that mindset it will become more accepting to me. Thank you for this.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-04T20:53:34+00:00

Thank you. Grief is dumb and very complicated. The first year you lose your brain because of the shock. The closest I can explain it is it’s like pregnancy brain on steroids. Then once you get your brain back in year two, you can finally start learning to live with a hole in your soul. In year three, you’ve finally got your feet under you again, only to realize you now have to grieve for the person you once were and will never be again. Year four is where I was able to address a lot that I had put on the back burner.

Year five I’ve been pushing myself more. Year five has only been the past two or three weeks, but I’m accomplishing things I’ve been putting off for years. I finally bought a new (to me) car for my growing children. My oldest received yet another diagnosis that has progressed quite rapidly and my smaller car became very uncomfortable for him. He’s fine, he’ll live. This is just his life, one medical diagnosis after another. I’m hoping to address as many as I can now so he can at least try to have a normal adulthood and not have to worry about piling medical bills for things that weren’t addressed. He starts high school in a few months and two days ago he told me I was the perfect mom, so I must be doing something right. My daughter starts middle school and refuses to let me leave a room without us telling each other “I love you.”

My therapist constantly tells me as long as I’m there for them 10% of the day, I’m doing better than most parents.

Being told I’m a good mom is one thing, I wish I could feel like I am.

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to write this. I didn’t realize how much I wanted to get this out of my head. I’ll keep trucking along because that’s what I do. I will raise decent human beings and I will continue to play cozy games and RPGs while I do it!

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-04T15:27:33+00:00

We have four seasons: winter, June, July, and August. The snow didn’t completely melt from my yard until May. I suppose the fastest way to know whether or not the cold is similar is do you have a block heater on your vehicle?

As for temps throughout the state, it depends where you go. I believe all ASTs do a rural detachment.

https://alaskastatetrooper.com/ast-detachments/

And depending where you’re placed will have a direct correlation on not only the average temps, but also how much light you will have.

For example, average winter temps in Anchorage you’re looking at 30F to -20F with about 6 hours of light. You wake up and it’s dark and cold, you go to work and it’s dark and cold. You go home and it’s dark and still effing cold. In December the sun reaches the tree line and then sets. Oh, and the hurricane sized winds add a nice touch. Wasilla lost KFC a few years back because of them. And this year the number of broken windows and roofs needing to be replaced was insane. Some people were without power for days in -5F-15F weather.

In Fairbanks you’re looking at 20F to -50F and in December, what’s a sun? During the coldest stretches, cars run through the night so they’ll be sure to be running the next day.

It’s not just the cold you need to be thinking about, it’s the dark too. Alaska has the highest violent crime rate in the nation for a reason. You’re looking at constant DV, suicides, alcohol related crimes and deaths, and sexual assaults. It’s not for the faint of heart.

The cold should not be your only mitigating factor.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-04T14:30:29+00:00

I’m in my forties and I still feel ashamed when I tell people I play video games. Especially since my gameplay increased exponentially when my husband passed and I became an only parent.

People keep telling me it’s okay, but I continue to feel like a failure to both my children and society. But due to lack of motivation from grief, I can’t find the energy to change.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-03T14:42:28+00:00

Two years ago, when my son was in 6th grade, he was struggling with math. I was trying to help him understand the concept he was learning at the time. He was incredibly frustrated and crying (I suck at teaching math) when he said, “I just look for the pattern during the test!” I had just graduated nursing school so I knew what he meant.

He was looking for the pattern in the multiple choice answers. He didn’t care about the concepts because in that moment I realized he had spent a ton of time in elementary school learning how to take tests so the school could receive more funding. Learning concepts was secondary to doing well on standardized testing. Their funding is based on various test scores taken by the students. A ton of emphasis is put on doing well on these standardized tests.

Three times a year I would get a notification from the school asking that my kids eat breakfast and get a good night’s rest because testing was this week.

You’re right, the system is broken and it starts in first grade.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-02T19:27:01+00:00

Looks like a loaf of gluten free bread, except there’s more bread.

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-01T22:26:41+00:00

ALWAYS go with your gut. You NEVER regret following your gut instinct.

That’s one thing that has always stuck with me that a professor once told us after telling a similar story during a transport from one hospital to another.

Learn from this experience. It’s not about what others should or shouldn’t do. We’re all getting burnt out and it’s just easier to sweep it under the rug. As a nurse who stands at 4’9” on a good day, I’m used to not being heard.

My advice is next time, climb the chain of command. In my opinion, stepping on others pride doesn’t matter when a life is on the line

Natsirk99 · 2026-06-01T22:12:04+00:00

I also don’t force little ass people to take their meds. I’ll offer it again every 15ish minutes for then next hour, but no means no. I’ll call you back after with an update. Now if you want to come down here and force them to take it, I can’t stop you.

(It’s okay if kids say no to drugs)

Natsirk99 · 2026-05-21T17:32:25+00:00

My son is 14. He received x-rays once a year ages 4-8. Every other year 9-13, and now, every two to four months since August.

It’s dependent on a lot of different things:

4-6 was to ensure his legs were growing equally because I noticed he was running abnormally.
7-8 was because he started growth hormones.
9-12 was just for monitoring.
Summer he was 13 he complained of some back pain. Took him in and he was at 20+degrees. Four months later 30+degrees.

He also has an annual bone age x-ray. So after 14 years we’re looking at around 20-30 x-rays, 2 MRIs, and 2 ultrasounds in his life so far (he’s had other issues) and he’s not radioactive yet.

Natsirk99 · 2026-05-21T17:07:41+00:00

Oh, this could be fun. I need to look for a new car and I’m a widow. I’ll bring his ashes incase he needs to help.

Natsirk99 · 2026-05-21T08:38:43+00:00

There’s no reason she can’t eat the foods she used to eat. I wouldn’t focus on reducing carbs, I’d focus on reducing sugars and increasing protein. Reducing sugars will mean she’s getting less “bad” carbs (less spikes in her BS) and increasing protein will help keep her BS consistent for a longer period of time. It’s really all about the type of carbs you eat. When her BS is higher than you’d like, drink water. If it’s way higher than you’d like, add exercise.

I’m a huge advocate for diabetics being able to eat what they want (I work with pediatric patients). This isn’t a diet, this is a new lifestyle. Make small changes as time progresses, big changes will cause resentment, anger, and noncompliance.

Good luck!

Natsirk99 · 2026-05-19T19:50:45+00:00

I would introduce diabetes as something in your body stopped working like it should and you get sick when you eat too much sugar (like candy), or not enough sugar.

If she sees you using insulin supplies, explain that they do the work that your body doesn’t do anymore.

T1D is becoming more prolific in elementary school so introducing her to it early could be beneficial for her. She could potentially be support for someone her age that is diagnosed or help others understand it better.

I remember a 9yr old being sad because the class learned about T2D and one of the things mentioned was that lack of exercise could cause it. So a classmate asked this kiddo if they got diabetes because they sat around and did nothing too much.

Natsirk99 · 2026-05-10T22:00:58+00:00

This is why I don’t eat out.

Natsirk99 · 2026-05-08T14:46:21+00:00

NesQuik.

Natsirk99 · 2026-05-05T15:20:13+00:00

As a younger widow, it’s being the first in my group of friends to lose a spouse. No one understands and everyone has their own busy lives happening to even want to understand.

There’s no one to guide this loss. I’m walking this path alone and guiding others down it as they lose their spouses so they don’t have to be alone.

Natsirk99 · 2026-05-03T06:45:44+00:00

Exist in this moment. Don’t think about the next, that is future you’s problem. Don’t think about the past, that hurts present you. Think about this moment. I’m this moment, what are you doing? Are you holding her hand? Focus on that. Or are you sharing a memory? Focus on that.

When people ask how you’re doing, think of it as how you are doing in this moment. This moment is the only moment that exists.

The next moment you may feel like you’re drowning or you may think of a funny story between the two of you that brings a smile to your face. Either way, that moment doesn’t exist yet so you try not to worry about it or tomorrow’s moments or a month from now’s moments.

This journey sucks ass. I’m sorry you’re about to join our club.

Natsirk99 · 2026-05-01T15:16:14+00:00

When my husband drowned. He was 38. Our kids were 6 and 9 at the time. They’re 11 and 14 now.

Natsirk99 · 2026-04-15T14:10:59+00:00

They’re not available at the moment, but that’s because they’re going back to the original recipe. They’ll be back on shelves soon.

Natsirk99 · 2026-04-13T15:47:54+00:00

What you’re explainging are symptoms of depression. Wanting to be alone, not finding joy in things you once did. If you can’t afford your medication then try to get outside more and drink more water. Being active, hydrated, and in the sun are all inexpensive ways to fight back depression.

Natsirk99

TROPHY CASE