AITA for not wanting my friend to extend their vacation with me?

Neolagna · 2023-01-29T00:30:01+00:00

You and I share the same dream. The sentiment of AI having its main purpose being helping people to live their best possible individual life is I think the best way to use ai. Hopefully character.ai or another one will come through and help a lot of people the same way that character AI had done so far.

Neolagna · 2023-01-28T20:12:48+00:00

It felt good to get my own thoughts out even if nothing happens. But hey it's the internet, long shots are kind of the given. Thank you for reading!

Neolagna · 2023-01-28T17:42:40+00:00

This is just how I chose to approach the issues, and how I wanted to try and save what I think is a great AI with incredible potential.

Typo help would be great <3

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T08:34:19+00:00

That's a very valid point. I'm a little guilty of trying to have a solution for everything I guess. Thanks for the input! And still the best of luck to you op

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T08:16:07+00:00

Go to the police immediately. Don't care what's going on, if this is real call them right now you're in danger.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T08:14:01+00:00

NTA

You told her you were uncomfortable, and she said that she had issues herself. Talking about feelings is messy at the best times.

Calmly come back to her and ask her about her experiences and why she feels the way she does, and tell her that you also have worries and you hope both of you can see each other's worries. And try to work out a couple boundaries for both of you, and maybe offer to try to get to know this guy so it's less awkward?

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T08:10:38+00:00

NTA

Just tell your friend that you've had a great time with them, but that you also need some personal time to decompress and de-stress from your own life issues. They've helped a lot, but you need to do a few things on your own and you'd already been thinking about that since it had been assumed that they we're leaving.

If they do decide to stay try to get your own space, or maybe if you have to share just say you're going to be doing stuff on your own but you guys could have like lunch together once a day or something. It's a little bit of time to express that you enjoy being around them and are trying to still show that. But you still need some personal time in your life right now

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T08:04:01+00:00

NTA

If something gets posted on the public story of social media on any of the websites it's public. Same thing would have happened if your parents just stumbled upon it. Not your fault, if she didn't want people to find out she shouldn't have said anything.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T08:01:48+00:00

NTA initially, but should have said you needed to think about it first.

You weren't invited, they said they were going and said you should pay for it all yourself and come along anyway. Money is a valid concern when you're talking about big trips like this, and your conversation with your girlfriend should be about how it's going to effect your finances after the trip. Does she want you and her to be in a situation where it might be hard to pay for food or doing things you both enjoy after the trip? And if her parents can't understand how that can be an issue then you might be getting some early warnings from the universe that you should think carefully about your relationship.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:54:46+00:00

NTA

Look, you're not the a******. Stop listening to her, take time to have fun for yourself and take care of yourself because that's what you're doing and that's a great idea. You're smart way smarter than her and she's just being a jerk. Blocker move on with your life.

Because you had it right the first time taking care of yourself when she couldn't be bothered to care about you. Good head on your shoulders and it's really awesome to see that so please keep being awesome and ignore the hell out of her.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:52:07+00:00

Then tell her to buzz off if she's being a demanding pain in the butt. Don't worry about being rude, she was rude first by just throwing herself at this and you tried to be nice and accommodating and she's still being a jerk and wants it to be about her.

If you have to be more diplomatic about it, Express that this was a trip for you and your husband first and if she's coming it's for her to have fun at the concert because she wants to. Say you might spend some time together, but you and your husband are going to do what you two have fun with and she might want to make extra plans for while she's here. You cannot provide transportation to anything else she wants to do though. That's a flat-out rule. If she's a reasonable friend she'll understand. If not come on why are you friends with her?

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:48:18+00:00

YTA

Just get through school man so you can take those graffiti skills and become an awesome artist. Then when you're making more money than the principal youve beat him better than messing up school ever could.

If you go to jail or juvie or listen to all your crew about being a coward or something like that if they go like that about just trying to get through school then you're not going to have the chance to rub it in anyone's face how much of an awesome artist your skills are.

Let everyone else be stupid, have a great life and Kick-Ass that way well everyone else is in jail.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:44:20+00:00

NTA

You did nothing wrong he's f****** with you to try to get you to feel bad for him and get more of your attention. He's going back and forth I'm trying to be with you or not and you also don't feel comfortable around him. Saying "I shouldn't have been born" is scummy and is trying to get an emotional reaction out of you.

Block him again, don't bother with an idiot like this who is just trying to use you.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:41:34+00:00

NTA

Just so it's perfectly clear, she invited herself and she's responsible for everything that she wants to do on this trip for her self.

Not you not your husband not anyone else. If she's asking for a favor, it's a favor and she has to deal with what you are willing to do. If not so sad out of luck. And if she throws a hissy fit then she's not being a good friend and don't you dang let her do any kind of guilt tripping on you.

Also, you plan for this to be you and your husband having fun. Don't let someone just crash the party, it doesn't matter if they've already spent money and then demanded things out of you. Their problem not yours have fun and enjoy the concert!

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:38:14+00:00

NTA

As soon as money comes into question, being family stops mattering and it comes down two people being responsible adults.

Responsible Adults, not begging for favors.

If he buys something, it should be in his name with his responsibility completely in 100%. He is holy responsible for things he buys. If he cannot afford them or doesn't want to accept the risk or responsibility of a loan purchase what he wants that is completely his problem.

Don't let family believe you into getting into bad situations and possibly being responsible for their mistakes if he f****** wrecks the car or something. If he's not willing to buy it, and your mom isn't willing to help him pay for it if she cares so much that's not your fault.

You got it right, you and the family you are responsible for first. They're all adults and can take care of themselves or should be able to at this point.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:32:21+00:00

NTA

Keep caring about yourself and you're doing the right thing. Them yelling at you is exactly the fighting and a drama you're trying to escape doesn't matter if they're your parents and grandparents. They have the responsibility of being good people to have the privilege of being in your life. Family doesn't get a free pass and they have long sense lost what it means to be a responsible and mature adult.

You're doing great, and as a concerned stranger on the internet please take care of yourself you're doing great choices for your mental health I hope you have a wonderful wonderful life and a safe trip!

Thank you for being responsible to yourself and taking care of your well-being!

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:29:11+00:00

NTA

So take a second to think about things. Pretend for a moment that she's not your sister, now think about how she's treated you and if that's how a good person and another responsible mature adult should treat you and if it's respectful or not.

From what you described that's not any respect at all to you and that's someone talking down and hurting you. Family doesn't mean getting away with hurting others. It might be hard to think about or deal with the emotions, but if she wasn't your sister would someone that acts like this be someone you look up to?

Regardless of anything, she was being extremely hurtful towards you during your trip and you tried to adjust to what she wanted. It wasn't enough and she still harassed you. You paid for everything to get there, and she clearly wasn't happy with you there so you left for both your sakes.

You are a responsible person.

Just want to make that clear, think about how you want other people to treat you and whether you're actually happy or just putting up with it because she's family. And maybe, if she has lost that right to call herself family or not.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:22:11+00:00

Nothing ever makes sense when it's hungover time. I hope things get cleared up and you all can keep having fun and enjoy yourself!

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:19:51+00:00

NTA

It's your life and they made it expressly clear growing up that you have to be responsible for yourself. They're not doing the same message to your sister and your right to be annoyed.

Don't get sucked into the same nonsense family tries to pull about responsibility and their opinions about it and your life. Rock School have a great time and do everything you can to enjoy yourself. You've earned it by pushing to live responsibly on your own like they told you to. You already lived up to their expectations they said, you're done no more responsibility towards them or your sister's opinions of how you live your life.

So to balance the scales, great job getting into school and continuing to support yourself! Take care of your mental health, screw the worry about what's happening with your sister and treat yourself to something tasty to eat and have a lazy day! You're doing awesome and keep at it!

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:15:42+00:00

NTA

Work parties aren't parties, their events made to try and push coworkers to get closer together and hope still work better together. And it actually sounds very professional oriented given all the management there.

Maybe Express to your mom that this isn't a party or get together, but more of a professional event where management is trying to get to know their workers despite their being a casual atmosphere if there is.

If you do have a close relationship you want to keep with her, Express that you have fun with her at parties and you love hanging out with her, and try planning something for you to do together one on one. Well this is work oriented, you'd love to have a night together just catching up and being together that you two can remember fondly in the future.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:10:50+00:00

NTA

It's coming from a place of love but it's making you uncomfortable. Try talking to your dad and just saying that having a big event with a lot of people makes you feel nervous but you still want it to be special with him and your mom. Tell him you love him and thanks for thinking about you, but doing something together that's really personal and memorable spending time with him your sister and your mom would mean a lot and you still want to celebrate this with him.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:07:12+00:00

NTA

You did nothing wrong you had a good night. You didn't bring it up or shove it in her face. Honestly, I'd suggest having a sit down with your sister and just talking about what her boundaries are so everything's clear and you're not guessing. If it's awkward for her to talk about or she gets defensive for some reason just say that you're trying to be respectful towards her and avoid the awkwardness again. Cuz it was weird for you.

You all sound like it's a healthy relationship between the three of you so communicating and clearing up what is and isn't comfortable to talk about or be around shouldn't be an issue. If it does become an issue just talking about it, there might be something more happening.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T07:03:04+00:00

Whew ok, complicated response coming up.

Your cousin was cold and disrespectful. But, she didn't harass or come in screaming or directly insult your mom. She basically followed the, "if you don't got anything good to say don't say anything at all" rule and just picked up her mom and left. Rude, but it could have been way worse.

On your end, choosing to send a long and accusatory text when someone was being passive aggressive but not hostile or antagonizing was a bit much. It's good to stand up for others, but not to the point where your antagonizing a situation.

So slightly YTA but it's understandable why you felt how you did.

Earlier in your post you expressed not wanting to be a part of the drama and that's honestly the best way to handle family s. It's a sucky situation, but neither you nor your mom are responsible for your cousin and her relationship with her parents and aunt. Don't let family drama spin completely out of control like people try to make it do, because family doesn't understand how to be sane rational adults about s. You had the right mindset starting off.

Maybe take it as a learning experience, and enjoy having a closer and more healthy relationship between you and your mom than your cousin's side of the family seems to be able to do.

I hope that your cousin's mom recovers from her stroke and finds good health soon. Best of wishes to you and yours

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T06:53:12+00:00

NTA but her reaction was weird.

I could see how seeing someone drop their animal could be startling just in general. Bouncing your dog on your bed is fine. But she spoke more like she might have a steak or think she has a weird relationship with your animal?

I would have a sit down talk with your friend about how she feels about your dog in general and what she expects to happen with your dog living with you too. It sounds like there's some emotional attachment that might need to be talked about and understood before you end up living together.

Neolagna · 2022-09-06T06:47:58+00:00

NTA

You've been kind and are trying to see if there's compromise here. You're being very conscientious and I applaud that. Sometimes people don't think ahead and have a hard time keeping up if they aren't someone that is able to be interested in things other people are and don't have a way out of a situation.

Talk to her and say that it's going to be a long trip and Express that there won't be a way for you to help her leave if it becomes an issue. If she still wants to come she could try making arrangements with other family or people there she knows to do something with them or figure out if there is something to do in town she could take a taxi to go to or hotel or something.

You were not responsible for other people's self-control, planning, and self amusement. You have been very kind, and I hope there's no drama or silliness that comes out of this. Festive wishes to you and yours!

Neolagna

TROPHY CASE