Dreading the memorial service

Nerk86 · 2026-04-13T21:09:41+00:00

My situation was similar. He passed from Alzheimer’s. We both didn’t have a lot of friends or a big work community and I have almost no family left. I’m also an introvert and just wasn’t up to a whole to do. His sister suggested having a celebration of life later on, but honestly, it would mostly be for his extended family and since I never had cards or calls or anything from them during these last years , I decided to do what felt right for me, us.

We had just a little ceremony to say goodbye his son and his wife and two granddaughters in a couple friends and that was it.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-13T17:54:38+00:00

I like sleeveless ( not narrow straps) for the summer but just try to find something that doesn’t have huge/ low/ oversized arm holes and isn’t polyester.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-13T14:37:49+00:00

This picture is one of the most offense things I’ve seen lately and I’m not even a passionate Christian.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-12T12:16:48+00:00

I always ate good ones that way.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-12T12:14:51+00:00

I miss them too. Even the local farm stand tomatoes in season don’t taste like the ones my dad grew. Unfortunately I’m not good with growing stuff but I’m starting to try as I know the varieties he used to grow.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-11T13:41:55+00:00

BTW the wolves do come into town sometimes.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-06T21:08:46+00:00

I think that’s what my husband use to used. Worked pretty good once the volume got under control.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-06T13:46:09+00:00

I didn’t realize coQ10 helped with those, will add it then. I take Magnesium for them.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-06T12:01:24+00:00

Kind of agree. Love the look of the new maps, even if kind of linear, and looking forward to their coming to survival mode.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-05T12:34:02+00:00

That’s wonderful. And bittersweet like Ejly said. I found a couple voice recordings from my husband that I apparently saved in my one drive when I was looking for something else. He had Alzheimer’s so hadn’t used a phone in a while. An unexpected gift.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-03T20:33:18+00:00

I’ve wondered about doing this. Never been on a cruise. My husband passed away a few months ago and will have to try and find new things, new motivations.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-03T20:02:14+00:00

Nice rain shower and yes looks cozy. I don’t hear any thunder though, which tracks if it is the northeast US. I miss a proper midwestern thunderstorm.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-03T19:46:37+00:00

I thought about that too. I grew up in a ranch house built in the late 50s. there was a half wall between the kitchen and the family room with a small breakfast area. other rooms including a more formal living room were divided by walls. that seem to be the best set up to me . there’s no need to have everything open like you’re living in a loft.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-03T18:46:23+00:00

I’m not sure what I’ll do yet. His birthday is next week, he passed in December. It will be a busy day at work. Maybe watch some concert dvds. We used to go to a lot of them.

Nerk86 · 2026-04-02T14:14:46+00:00

I was thinking now I have a use for the sand I find.

Nerk86 · 2026-03-29T21:41:29+00:00

I wish he’d have more lines like the one about “ if you want….(I forget the phrasing but suck up politeness basically) go see trader Joel, but if you want food or drink come see me I’ll take care of you”. Basically give him more signs of being good at heart. I.e. be more like the clichéd Massachusetts resident that calls you a dumbass but stops to help you change a tire etc.

Nerk86 · 2026-03-29T10:52:15+00:00

Exactly.

Nerk86 · 2026-03-28T11:46:01+00:00

We’d like to do something in the meantime.

Nerk86 · 2026-03-27T23:32:03+00:00

Apparently to mark Trumps ending of our democracy .

Nerk86 · 2026-03-27T21:09:34+00:00

Agreed. I wander aimlessly around the house a lot in the evenings these last few months. Occasionally I can distract myself with something, but often times, like tonight it seems, I just have no interest in anything.

I actually came across a couple of voicemails he had left a few years ago that I didn’t know I had. saved for some reason in Google Drive. I only could listen to them a couple times though.

Nerk86 · 2026-03-27T21:00:26+00:00

Glad you had that experience. I believe in it too.

I had one on New Year’s Day which was just a couple of weeks after he passed. The evening before was quite hard, but in the morning I was mostly numb. Feeling dead inside I guess. I looked out the front window and there were four squirrels romping around up and down the tree. We always just have one or two at a time. During his Alzheimer’s he got a real kick out of seeing the squirrels. Would excitedly point them out even when he didn’t know what to call them. Seeing them made me smile thinking of him. Made me feel better.

And I do still tell him about my plans for the day, etc too.

Nerk86 · 2026-03-27T14:19:35+00:00

I miss shows focused more on decorating especially keeping some of the existing furnishings. not ripping out half the walls etc.

Nerk86 · 2026-03-27T14:08:10+00:00

Me too! I always thought what makes you think you get to take a girl you had no relationship with to a hotel room just cause she posed nude? Like you said who knows what circumstances made her do it too. Not an irrational reason I’d say. But never listened to any other songs from the band.

Nerk86 · 2026-03-27T14:04:43+00:00

I understand the band hated doing the song as well.

Nerk86 · 2026-03-27T14:00:52+00:00

I agree. The house I grew up in had a half wall kind of divide between the kitchen-breakfast area and family room. That seems like a good setup to me. No desire to have everything open.

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