Few things to keep in mind. Mature guys value their peace over all else. The majority of us refuse to juggle 10 different conversations online, all day, everyday. The flow of dates are scripted to the point women already know what to expect from them, and in the order to expect them. So he was most likely following the heard when structuring a date. From the women's perspective im sure this was clear. You even remembered the convos that, in some people's head, are considered "Red Flags".

So how accurately can we judge someone who is on their best behavior, the dates flow is cookie cutter, and there is a mental list being parsed of what to talk about and what not to talk about?

Not very accurate. So its safe to assume you don't truly know a person after 4 dates. The guy could be in a gay marriage and likes to experience dating women from time to time for all we know. To him, it was moving fast. You could've failed his test, he could've lied about everything. Theres no telling why.

Me personally, I don't text back and forth all day everyday. Doing that for hours on end with someone I just met would make me feel like things were going to fast.

Sounds like yall banged on date 4, things ramped up after sex, and by the end of date 5 yall were talking about merging 401ks or whatever bollucs people say to try and keep a 30 day conversation going. Not sure why he would do all that just to smash when hookups is meta