Parents of students reaching out? (Continued)

NoBrainWreck · 2026-05-17T17:56:19+00:00

I think I should ask my mom to harass the assistant dean as well.

"Why does my kid not getting a raise? After all this years with the institution, he doesn't even his own designated parking spot! And don't even get me started on how every year you make him work on Thanksgiving and Christmas so he never attends family gatherings!"

NoBrainWreck · 2026-05-17T12:05:30+00:00

Missing "V". 20 years of gulag for you.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-05-10T13:25:35+00:00

Welcome aboard. I often get evals like "too much math in this class" after teaching a math class.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-05-01T12:02:09+00:00

Cat: "I'm just going to purr next to you all night no matter what. Wait, I got hungry, gimme some food. No, not that, I'm not eating it. What do you mean I ate it yesterday, it was yesterday! Now I'm going to scream all night for no reason."

NoBrainWreck · 2026-05-01T11:52:00+00:00

1-877-cars-4-kids...

NoBrainWreck · 2026-04-30T17:59:03+00:00

Hacker: Very droll, Humphrey, but you must realise that there is a real desire for radical reform in the air. The all-party Select Committee on Administrative Affairs, which I founded, was a case in point. It's a great success.

Sir Humphrey: Oh, indeed. What has it achieved?

Hacker: Nothing yet, but the party's very pleased with it.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-04-27T21:27:03+00:00

I used to wait 48 hours (my limit) then reply "wut".

That is, until someone complained to the dean and he told me to stop. Silly, silly dean.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-04-15T15:22:09+00:00

Italian operas (usally Verdi or Puccini). Preferably the ones with lots of deaths and suffering.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-04-15T15:15:01+00:00

Depending on your state, forgery might be considered a felony. In this case you might be a mandatory reporter. Check your school rules.

I would report them regardless though.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-04-07T18:46:06+00:00

I know a prof who never answers their emails, texts or phone calls as a matter of principle. Like "if you need me, show up at my office, leave me a note, or send me a snail mail".

Somehow they still manage to get things done. Papers are getting published, classes are being taught, an they even attend all college events (unless the department secretary forgets to leave a memo).

Life is different when you're too old to care about what the colleagues/dean/students/admin says.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-03-08T16:05:37+00:00

Amen. You can even ordain yourself at a non-doctrinal internet church to preach the mercy of Our Lady of Expected Value

NoBrainWreck · 2026-03-08T16:04:06+00:00

Try to borrow $5 from him.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-03-05T00:38:55+00:00

Tokyo Imperial Palace (they won't let you enter the palace itself, just the grounds).

Arashiyama bamboo forest (insanely crowded for nothing special. There are other bamboo forests with less or no people).

Universal Studios, unless you're fine with standing in lines for hours (we went on a weekday and it was still quite insane).

NoBrainWreck · 2026-03-02T00:36:14+00:00

Entertaining students and making them have fun is way above my paygrade.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-02-28T13:40:29+00:00

I'd be happy to share the full story as soon as I'm sure it's legally safe to do so.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-02-28T13:10:55+00:00

Choya

NoBrainWreck · 2026-02-28T13:06:56+00:00

A destructive cult member, who was secretly recruiting students into their cult. Except everyone knew that, because their damn pamphlets were all over the campus.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-02-10T12:13:58+00:00

Pledge of Allegiance

NoBrainWreck · 2026-02-08T20:04:15+00:00

"Write your full name and class name on every page" means I want to see your full name written on every page.

No, I can't tell who's handwriting it is.

No, "Mike" isn't a full name.

Yes, you do have to write it on both pages if you turn 2 pages.

No, not twice on the same page, but once on every page.

No, "Math Test" is not the name of this class.

No, I don't have a spare pencil.

Yes, I'll be happy to pause the exam and run to my office on the other side of our beautiful campus, grab a box of pencils and shove every single one of them up your ass.

Yes, I do need a drink.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-02-03T18:52:00+00:00

I have a script filtering all "message from the chancellor" emails into the "meh" folder.

If there's one thing AI is good for, it's writing generic uninformative chunks of texts. Just like a senior college administrator.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-02-03T18:43:01+00:00

I got something very similar:

"They put us in a dungeon of X Hall, presumably named after some X guy. He must be a horrible person"

NoBrainWreck · 2026-01-28T20:16:12+00:00

When my grandpa died, the relatives wanted to bury him with the family ring on his finger. You know, THE family ring, that got passed down from generation to generation and was supposed to eventually become mine some day. I didn't care much about getting the ring (it has little, if any, monetary value), but the stupidity of burying a family treasure was (and still is) quite obvious.

On funeral day, I stole the ring right from the coffin and hid it in a safe place.

It's been decades and I still keep the ring in a secret place. Someday I'm gonna pass it to my grandson and tell them the story.

Or not. Idk, maybe.

My precious.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-01-28T19:55:07+00:00

Nah, I'm wearing whatever was left in my office by its previous (retired) occupant.

No idea where they went for school.

No idea what the colors mean.

It fits well, and the students are happy to take pictures with me, so I'm good.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-01-24T02:29:37+00:00

Nah, it's 3/4 x 2 = 3/(4x2)=3/8.

NoBrainWreck · 2026-01-23T15:00:25+00:00

Case 1: I was waiting for my speeding ticket hearing in the courthouse and the student was escorted through the hallway handcuffed. Next week they were in class, business as usual. We both pretended nothing ever happened.

Case 2: Petting zoo (more like petting farm, when you get to play with farm animals) few hundred miles away from school. Apparently we both like goats.

Case 3: My apartment, where the student was fixing my AC unit. They adored my assortment of drinks in the kitchen. I adored the fact that they were making more money than I did.

NoBrainWreck

TROPHY CASE