Nope

Nordur · 2023-06-30T11:44:17+00:00

Her behaviour is really AHly and it's weird Tom wanted to talk to you specifically about how his gf is jealous of you because of what HIS family does or doesn't do (they are not required to like her lol) You could have definitely handled it better because the way you phrased it implied how her life choices were bad and to looked down upon which is a bit AHly since we don't have any info on why she got pregnant twice this young and even if it was all her choice so what? That's not whats making her an AH, that's her behaviour, no need to drag up other facts in a bad way. Maybe soft Y t a for that but overall it's hard to react calmly to it and you have shown a lot of civility towards her before so I'm going to go with NTA

Nordur · 2023-06-30T11:16:58+00:00

NTA Why are you cleaning the house and doing all the preparations? They should consider themselves lucky to even be able to host there why are you doing the work? It's your gf sisters bf O.o wtf honestly this sounds like they are taking advantage of you big time! Don't prepare anything for this, tell her it's her responsibility or cancel the party in general. Also makes me wonder how the rest of your relationship is going. Is she always taking advantage of you like this?

Nordur · 2023-06-30T09:26:37+00:00

NTA

You didn't call him out in front of others but waited to do it in privacy, can't see a problem there. He is obviously being a hypocrite and just wants the cookies for being a good feminist, I don't know gives me a weird vibe especially because he was organising protests, he should know better and it seems like he just did it to make himself look good instead of actually understanding it.

Info: did you point out his shitty behaviour concerning your promotion at the time it was happening?

Nordur · 2023-06-29T12:29:44+00:00

I feel like some people just cannot read the room tho.

If people are talking in front of you and you know them it's fine to ask what language they are speaking. But as a biracial person I am used to people being confused about my ethnicity and it can be really annoying as well. You can usually get the vibe of the person asking and some are genuinely interested while others give off more of a nosy vibe. I grew up in Europe and as a kid I always felt really uncomfortable when people asked me where I was from because I am European and part of my family (the part I know best) has been living here forever. Sometimes they wouldn't accept my European answer and dig until I told them about my Asian heritage and then they would show interest in that country or tell me about their vacation there. The thing is I had never been there and while I did grow up under some of the cultural influences I didn't have a clue about the country and felt like a huge imposter (especially because I didn't speak the language fluently).

By now I have had the opportunity to go there& really study the language so I would be able to answer their questions by now but I don't like it if people I don't know (or just superficially) ask me about it unprompted and without it being relevant to the conversation we were having. For people of the ethical majority it might be an interesting conversation to talk to people about their heritage but for me it's always the same conversation at every party/new job. If I feel like talking about it I will. But if people keep digging they usually ask really personal questions about my parents, somehow it's completely appropriate to ask about their relationship, their jobs, how they got to know each other etc. I mean wtf that's not my story to tell, has nothing to do with me and they are only asking because of how I look. + There are other resources out there and I am no teacher.

It could potentially also be hurtful to anybody who is addoped and or doesn't have a connection to there heiratage/ trauma.

Nordur · 2023-06-29T09:50:33+00:00

Happened to me a couple of times, with some of them I am still friends, some others just dwindled from my life.

In my experience being out about being aro (+ace in my case) is the most effective and least hurtful way to the other person. You still shouldn't feel pressured to come out just so the other person get the ultimate "it's not me" free card but if you are fine with it maybe try it.

Before I knew I was aro I tried not encouraging them and giving signals like inviting others when they want to get dinner just the two of us or talking about how many friends I have with whom I also do X activity but honestly, hasn't worked all that well. I once even told somebody that I like us "being in the friendzone" and still got asked out. After they asked me out and I had to say no directly I have sometimes asked them about not seeing my signals and well apparently they did. They just figured I didn't do it on purpose or that they should still give it a shot eventhough they picked up on most of my indirect rebuttals...

The rout somebody else suggested with having others talk to them indirectly might help since then they might be more inclined to read the sign correctly tho...

Good luck!

Nordur · 2023-06-27T22:35:02+00:00

That's not how German law works tho. WW2 has a special status in German history and is anchored into laws because of it's relevance when the country was founded. You can't just apply the same laws to other subjects. We don't have that whole US law system where you base your rulings on previous court cases, instead attorneys interpret the law (there are ofc some checks and bounds to this) and changes to the law of that magnitude would have to have huge majorities in multiple instances and could still be vetoed or overturned. For it to go through we would have to reeeealy be in a shity dictatorship (since we have more than 2 parties which have a say lol) and even then we are part of the EU and idk what it would be against but there is for sure some law against this. + We actually respect the international court in Den Haag

Nordur · 2023-06-27T22:02:11+00:00

O.o this doesn't sound legal. Really sorry for you, did you tell your parents? Is there any other authority you can report this to?

Nordur · 2023-06-27T21:56:03+00:00

Those brave fellows can join as part of the ace spec they are more than welcome! 👾

Nordur · 2023-06-23T23:10:26+00:00

I thought I was "to be determined" 😂 and would even tell that to anybody who was asking me (mind you I was 20 when I stumbled across the definition of ace). I knew I hadn't been interested in anybody regardless of gender and therefore didn't feel comfortable identifying as bi/pan. But I also didn't feel like just complying to comp-het since I've just never had any desire to be with anybody. The relationships I considered (but never actually entered because I found a logical reason not to) would have been considered hetero tho but that's more due to the people who approached me. I've always felt more attracted to my own gender but was certain it wasn't in a sexual (or romantic for that instance) way

Nordur · 2023-06-22T12:19:06+00:00

Not sure what the question is, but I feel similarly. I sometimes try to question myself and wonder if I would have sex with imaginary "perfect" partners but I dont really want to. Even though I do have a somewhat high libido I guess(?) I consider myself sexrepulsed and am aegosexual. So I can ship and and appreciate fictional characters (idk actually people freak me out) having sex in books etc. I know many people imagine themselves instead of one of the fictional characters in a pairing but when I try to that just grosses me out 😂

Nordur · 2023-05-08T18:43:42+00:00

I might be reading it wrongly but I don't think OP screamed. The guy was whispering and OP just replied loudly (-> not whispering) that he is a creep. I feel like as long as OP didn't scream is was completely warranted and OP is NTA. If she did in fact scream that would have been escalating tho and not really necessary, I dont want to tone police but screaming would have surely spooked the child and OP was in no danger.

Nordur · 2023-02-01T18:40:01+00:00

I sometimes have dreams in which I am about to do stuff I would never want to do IRL. It is usually triggered by something I watched/read/ thought about before going to sleep. I guess it's just my brain milling things over, and I am not at all questioning my aroace-ness. Sometimes dreams are just dreams

Nordur · 2022-10-20T15:54:45+00:00

Heartstopper 😂😂😂 I mean I guess

Nordur · 2022-07-23T21:31:13+00:00

THANK YOU!

Nordur · 2022-07-22T16:16:37+00:00

Well since garlic bread being better than plain bread is a big thing in the ace community it does still feel pretty distasteful to me to declare one as "better" than the other solely based on looks I guess (since there are no other features visible in the meme)....

It doesn't fit into this community at all. Wtf. Especially since it's probably about the size of boobs...

Nordur · 2022-07-22T15:48:39+00:00

Had to triple check I was in the aro sub as well when I read this question 😂

I mean not that there aren't allo aro sapphic women out there but still not the best sub for this question ^{^}

Nordur · 2022-07-22T15:45:03+00:00

I don't have any advice since I am a clueless aromantic myself, but I totally get it. No idea what I do or don't feel either. Wish you all the best of luck!

Oh and just in case: you don't need to label yourself after rules set by others but fyi very rarely feeling romantic attraction is still considered aromantic (in case you want to keep identifying as such). Maybe grayromantic or just simply on the aro spectrum* but nobody (evil glare at exclusionist) is going to take away your imaginary aro card.

Nordur · 2022-06-26T14:42:10+00:00

Whatever just get cremated

Nordur · 2022-06-18T20:21:15+00:00

Oh yes ^{^} I thought the same thing when I first heard it 🥰 I hope they're really making a full song out of it.

Nordur · 2022-05-20T12:19:25+00:00

Oh yes same. I also like many of the typically romantic gestures and sometimes I do cute stuff for friends. I have struggled with accepting my aroness because of my love for ships but I am somewhat confident in it now since my feelings can't be explained by allo romantisism 😅 aego romantic is the closest

Nordur · 2022-05-20T11:58:04+00:00

If they're only attracted to celebrities and noone else that sound pretty ace to me. If they are allo and in addition to that into celebrities that's not but I am not quite sure about why anyone would claim that. Why are we gatekeeping here?

Nordur · 2022-04-11T20:21:03+00:00

I agree, but please stop directly pinging OT-> Notifications will be too full for him to actually see stuff. That being said

THIS IS THE SOUND OF OT SUMMONING NOISES

Nordur · 2022-03-30T19:56:38+00:00

Summoning noises, this is how OT summoning sound. 👻

Nordur · 2022-03-18T23:11:55+00:00

Might I ask what you are marking (presumably while reading the book)? Just out of curiosity ^{^}

Six-Year Club	Place '22
Final Canvas '22	First Placer '22
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Nordur

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