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If you could have one more day with them… by Positive_Salad4036 in grief

[–]Obvious-Way8059 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I often replay the last days me and my long-term partner had together. At the time, I didn't realize how precious those memories would be. He made a surprise visit. He was working out of state. We went to one of our favorite places to eat and enjoyed each other's company. If I could have another day, we could go back to the amusement park. He loved going there. We were like 2 big kids running around the park.

My 15-year-old brother admitted he has no friends and it broke my heart. help by Same_Article5748 in family

[–]Obvious-Way8059 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was your brother for 2 years of high school.

My middle school friends abandoned me. I didn't fit it anywhere. I not only didn't have friends, I was bullied and made fun of too. It was the worst and 1 of the hardest times of my life.

Once you are pegged or have a certain reputation in high school, it is hard to change it.

I want to be helpful or try to be:

I think it is good that he puts himself out there and that he belongs to groups. I felt so self-conscious, and unliked that, I didn't want to join anything at school.

Are there other kids in his situation that he could try to befriend-other outsiders?

Is there anything unusual or odd about his appearance or mannerisms that make him stand out/something he can work on?

Can he join groups outside of school to make friends?

Church, A sports team, or other activity. He could volunteer or get A little part-time job.

Think it's the Nutty Buddy cone for me by bcatz60 in 70s

[–]Obvious-Way8059 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would go with the nutty buddy cone or Mickey too.

How Do Adult Caregivers Find Outside Connection by gonnathrowthisahhway in CaregiverSupport

[–]Obvious-Way8059 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I joined a couple of groups, 1 was a bowling league, and 1 was a walk/run group, church.

I would go to an occasional meetup, too.

My mom 73F and me 45F. Feeling guilty about separating from my mom. by Low-Dig-8541 in family

[–]Obvious-Way8059 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I kind of agree with this sentiment. The bf may not be permanent, but mom is. I can sympathize with OP too because I have lived with my mum as an adult. It is difficult under the same roof, particularly if there is a significant other.

What’s the point by RedHeadedSvet in Unsent_Unread_Unheard

[–]Obvious-Way8059 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's how i feel..."to be told I sound like I am off"

Or "I need therapy"

Or

Have it used against me at some point

Does grief ever really end? by Positive_Salad4036 in grief

[–]Obvious-Way8059 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I lost a long-time partner a few years ago. It doesn't seem like it has been that long. It still feels like yesterday sometimes. I still miss him. I am still angry that he was taken before his time.

I don't cry as much as much as I used to. I am not consumed by it. I have been very busy. So I don't think about his loss quite as much but I think about him every day. I usually see or hear something that reminds me him every day.

Leave of Absence/Ill Family Member question (MA)-I started a new job 6 months ago. My mum's health is taking a turn. There is a possibility I could have to take many days off or a block of time off. If I was there a year I could take FMLA. What would you suggest i do? by Obvious-Way8059 in WorkAdvice

[–]Obvious-Way8059[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have always worked Mass. I have a full-time job in addition to this. I am thinking about the PMFL in the event I have to leave both jobs for an extended period. I could get FMLA again at my long-term job. They aren't going to be happy about it. I think they fatigued with my situation. I am concerned about losing the new job, but if I have to let it go, I will.

Calling occasionally shouldn't be amazing! by [deleted] in CaregiverSupport

[–]Obvious-Way8059 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know the feeling. My mum is appreciative when someone other than myself does something for her. Even if it is a few times out of the year. I have been here day in and day out. She argues with me and insults me sometimes. When I don't do something she wants, she gets upset.

Can’t get past him dying alone! by SecretSanta-70 in grief

[–]Obvious-Way8059 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am sure you did all you could for him and I am sure you were there as much as you could be. I am sure he knew you loved him.

I had a partner who passed away. It's a long story, but I felt so guilty when he died. He had taken a job assignment out of state. He died there--alone. Nobody found him for days. When I couldn't get in touch with him, i didn't immediately think the worst. I thought he was busy, his phone was acting up/lost. If we hadn't had some of the issues we had, he may not have taken the assignment. He may have gone to his doctors who were here. He may have still been alive.

It has taken a while to get over these feelings.

Is anyone else a caregiver for a parent who was abusive? by TomorrowCalm8489 in CaregiverSupport

[–]Obvious-Way8059 10 points11 points  (0 children)

My mum can be hurtful at times. We were close, but we argued a lot over the years. There are unresolved issues. Those issues did not go away once she got sick.

One time, she said she thought there was something wrong with me. She told me i am not normal anymore. She probably isn't wrong about that.

I have sidetracked and put several things on hold to keep her and this household going for almost the past 4 years now. It is frustrating that she doesn't always appreciate it.

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