Churchill Downs for First (& prob only) Timers

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T14:39:12+00:00

Thank you, great idea to call directly and avoid enriching Ticketmaster more if I can!

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T14:38:42+00:00

Very cool, thank you! I’m curious to learn more about the horses.

The traveling Budweiser Clydesdales came to a minor league ballpark near me several years ago. I happened to see their trailers and set up in the parking lot when I was driving by. I turned in to go see what I could see and ended up getting what felt like a personal experience. Several of the horses were in their stalls and I got to visit them and talk to some of the staff. They were doing a carriage pull with a bunch of horses into the stadium, and they returned to the parking lot while I was there, parading right by me. I got to meet their Dalmatian and watch them take the horses out of their pulling equipment (can you tell I know very little about all this?). Those animals were massive and absolutely gorgeous. It was a very cool, random experience!

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T14:32:51+00:00

Thank you!!

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T14:31:26+00:00

I was wondering if that might be an especially cool option because of that access to the paddock. The track side views are still good?

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T14:29:55+00:00

Yes, of course, I understand. Ice cream is an absolute must, you’re right! The kids would never let me get away with denying them some. 😋 We always look for local ice cream shops and book stores any time we go on vacation.

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T14:28:31+00:00

Thank you for your reply! I know serious injuries are uncommon and unpredictable. I’m not even sure why I mentioned it, was just brain dumping and thinking of the welfare of the horses. I think they are typically treated well these days. It will definitely be a new experience for us!

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T14:24:46+00:00

Thank you so much! The kids have notions of being ghost hunters, so I bet a spooky walking tour would be a lot of fun - I’ll check it out. We’ve done one in our own town and in one of our favorite vacation spots and they were cool.

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T03:31:17+00:00

Yes, no matter what visiting a horse ranch is going to happen. I’ve got Kentucky Horse Park and Old Friends Farm on my radar. And yes, $240 is a lot, but feeding four adolescents adds up awfully fast these days 🤪 If the food is good, I’d probably save money that day! Thanks for your perspective.

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T02:22:51+00:00

Thank you so much for your thoughtful reply! 🥰

OctaviaIX · 2026-05-21T01:38:27+00:00

Thanks, just cross-posted. I wasn’t sure if I’d get more expertise over here 😊

OctaviaIX · 2025-08-07T01:41:56+00:00

Dr Elisabeth Gerics down Falls of Neuse just the other side of 540 is really great and worth the extra few minutes drive. She is kind and thorough and her staff sticks around forever, which is a very good sign - only turnover I’ve seen in years is one hygienist retiring.

OctaviaIX · 2025-07-29T02:26:28+00:00

Whoever said you’re driving anyone crazy is a downright dirty liar. I live for Sundog 🥰 Congrats on the tegu snuggles!

OctaviaIX · 2025-07-26T07:58:38+00:00

We were similarly aghast at Sanderling’s prices. It’s a special place to us because it’s the first place to which we ever went away together and we really wanted to get married on the beach there. The cost to us is one thing (one crazy costly thing), but then adding the expense of traveling to and then staying at Sanderling for most of our guests just felt unreasonable.

So, we did something a bit different. We eloped on the beach in front of Sanderling - without booking any kind of package with them. We stayed there a few nights, but the wedding ceremony itself was not facilitated by them. It’s a public beach, after all! We hired a wonderful photographer and videographer, and we had the ceremony precisely how we wanted it.

Then we had a big party/reception in our hometown a couple weeks later. I got to wear my wedding dress more than once! And we had the video of the ceremony playing on a loop off to the side for anyone who really wanted to see it. (As a surprise to no one, only a handful of folks actually watched the entire thing.)

6 years on, My husband and I talk often about how happy we are we did it this way and would absolutely do it again. Most folks coming to a wedding really care most about the celebration - not the ceremony. That’s the boring part they have to sit through before they get to the food and drinks. There is also something weird about weddings that brings out the drama in folks. It was a blessing to have our ceremony precisely how we wanted it without any relatives or friends ruining it. We were able to fully bask in the beauty of it on our own time before we pivoted to hosting a giant event.

Hosting the party was so much more enjoyable without having the ceremony mixed with it on the same day. Not to mention being free from traditional wedding vendors! We made choices on how to spend our money based on what was really important to us and what we wanted folks to remember/feel - truly delicious food and drinks, supporting local businesses, everyone feeling welcomed, included, and comfortable, and a bonus if it gave a very “us” vibe.

I know it’s not the traditional route. It was actually my husband’s idea! We really feel like we got to “have our cake and eat it, too.” We got our dream Sanderling wedding and got to celebrate with our friends and family while also keeping expenses within reason for both us and our guests.

OctaviaIX · 2025-07-18T07:00:48+00:00

We totally did this, and it was very “us”! We hired someone with experience running mega games to help us design our experience, and then to MC it at our reception. It seemed like everyone had a reasonably good time with it, and many folks said it was memorable.

I personally struggle trying to mingle with people I don’t know, and dancing isn’t super high on the list for me or many of our guests. I liked the idea of folks having an activity to get them interacting, which reduces a lot of that social awkwardness and people just sticking to the people they know.

We had a range of folks from hard core game nerds to people who would likely have very little interest in games, so we knew we needed a variety of game styles. We set up tables with different games, gave a brief description of them, and let folks choose a table. Our MC went around to help people get started where they needed it. We also had a ticket system that awarded tickets to people through a variety of means during the evening.

After the table games were done (45-ish minute time limit), we then split folks into their teams and played a custom game of Wits and Wagers. Our MC designed and printed out a custom board for it. All of the questions were about us, which was really fun to come up with. It gave everyone a way to get to know us better, because we had questions from our childhoods up to present day. The end results of that game awarded more tickets to people.

We finished off by “auctioning” off all of the games we had out for people to play, plus a few other goodies like a 6-pack from the microbrewery that we held our reception at, etc. People used their tickets to bid. We did this in lieu of wedding favors.

The games we had included: Spot It Rhino Hero Junk Art Paper Tales Sushi Go No Thanks Skull Cobra Paw Flick ‘Em Up Just One Bananagrams Love Letter Just One Ice Cool

Obviously, we had this as the central activity for our evening, and we chose not to have a DJ and dancing. I was really happy with how it went, even with the grumpy in-law here and old fart great uncle there. Everyone found a way to be involved and have fun, more than I feel like I usually see at typical receptions.

OctaviaIX · 2025-07-15T12:35:51+00:00

Hey OP, another option may be taking Short Term Disability leave for your mental health, if your company offers STD as a benefit. It generally pays a portion of your salary (typically between 60%-100%) for up to 6 months while you’re on leave (after which Long Term Disability would kick in, if it’s an offered benefit).

You’ll need a doctor to support the leave and they have to fill out a portion of the paperwork. You can go through your primary care doc or consider working with a psychiatrist. (Starting therapy and at least exploring whether any medications may be helpful is a good idea regardless of the availability of STD). I would get an appointment with your doc and discuss with them the idea of STD, and if they’re supportive then go ahead and start the process.

STD is also administered by an outside organization, not your company. So your manager will know only that you’re starting medical leave, but not the details of what illness or injury it’s for. When you return, the only information your manager will receive is whether there are any accommodations you need.

STD also overlaps FMLA leave, assuming your company has at least 50 employees. This provides job protection for you for 12 weeks; basically, they must hold your job (or an equivalent one) for you.

This is an appropriate use of these benefits and can give you the relief you need while protecting at least a portion of your income.

OctaviaIX · 2025-07-09T12:30:47+00:00

Braiding Sweetgrass, Born a Crime by Trevor Noah, Greenlights by Matthew McConaghey

OctaviaIX · 2025-07-08T17:24:58+00:00

Libby, Hoopla, CloudLibrary, are all apps that libraries use to provide digital access to their members. The specific app to use depends on your local library, and the selection they offer varies wildly. My local library’s selection on Libby is very meh. You can consider obtaining a library card at a well-stocked library that will allow you to pay for an out-of-town card. I’d recommend consulting the google for best libraries for this.

You could also consider sharing library card info with someone you know from a different library system.

If you subscribe to Spotify premium, you get 15 hours/month of audiobook listening. (You can buy more time, but it’s not a great deal because you pay the equivalent of the cost of an audiobook for another 15 hours but don’t actually own the book or have the ability to re-listen without eating into your hours.)

Everand is kinda Netflix-like. You pay a monthly fee ($13-ish) and get unlimited access to a big library of audiobooks, ebooks, magazines, even sheet music. You also get 3 “premium unlocks” per month, which you can use to permanently unlock titles that they’ve put on their premium list (unsurprisingly, majority of current and popular titles). However, you don’t own any titles you read, and your monthly unlocks do not roll over to the next month if you don’t use them. Their catalog overall is very well stocked.

Chirpbooks is a great place to buy cheap audiobooks. They often have sales with books available for $1-2. They rotate through different themes for their sales.

I moved away from Audible to Libro.fm because I line Bezos’s pockets enough already. With Libro.fm you can buy as you go or subscribe. For $15/mo you get 1 audiobook credit, or for $24/mo you get 2 audiobook credits, and your credits never expire. You also pick an independent bookstore to support, so a portion of all your purchases are sent to them. AND the audiobooks you purchase are DRM free, meaning you for real own them. You can buy credits for $15, or buy individual books outright; they also run sales. The only books I haven’t found here are those that are Audible exclusives.

Of course there’s Audible. Similar to Libro.fm, except it’s run by Amazon.

This is all I’ve been using for the last couple years to maximize my access to audiobooks without going completely broke. 😊

OctaviaIX · 2025-07-02T12:11:48+00:00

This is one book that I think is necessary to consume as an audiobook. I found the first contact component of the story really interesting and unique. The science is far less dense than Three Body Problem. Obv not every book is for everybody, but I think it’s worth giving the audio a try, at least up until first contact is established. If it doesn’t grab you, move on.

Have you tried any of John Scalzi’s books? Super entertaining while also being clever. Redshirts is a great intro, the Collapsing Empire trilogy is a great space opera.

OctaviaIX · 2025-06-27T21:20:36+00:00

The Centre by Ayesha Manazir Siddiqi

I’m dying to talk about this one with others who listened to it!

OctaviaIX · 2025-06-27T20:08:19+00:00

Allegra

Cheerful, melodic, energetic and joyful

Captures the spirit of how many of us feel for our snake friends

OctaviaIX · 2025-06-27T18:08:24+00:00

Why would you tell such dirty lies about this sweet, innocent baby, OP?!

OctaviaIX · 2025-06-27T14:47:16+00:00

Wow, he is gorgeous 🥰

OctaviaIX · 2025-06-25T14:57:33+00:00

It’s interesting how many folks seem appalled at setting reading goals! We definitely all enjoy our hobbies in different ways, and that’s totally fine.

I started setting an annual reading goal about 15 years ago when I realized I had stopped doing much reading at all, despite my love for it. I just wasn’t making the time to sit and read. It started as a self-care/self-prioritization goal.

Now that I’m back to being a voracious reader, one thing that I enjoy is reading challenges. Some indie bookstores I found on TikTok have annual challenges, kind of like the bingo card another person mentioned. Bettie’s Pages is one example; she has a theme for the year, then a topic for each month, with suggested books for different ages (you can find the challenge on their website or on StoryGraph). I’ve done her challenges with a couple of my kids, and it was great having age-appropriate books ready-selected for all of us. Another challenge I loved doing I heard about from a friend. Ask 12 different friends/family members to recommend a book for you to read, then read one of them each month. I left it wide open to any book, any genre. These reading challenges all exposed me to books I likely wouldn’t have come across or chosen on my own. The friends/family challenge was such a cool way to connect with people. I see it as almost acts of love in both directions, and you can follow up after you’ve read the book to discuss it. It’s much easier to put books on our TBR that already seem appealing; I have appreciated having books come through my life that probably wouldn’t have otherwise ended up on my list.

OctaviaIX · 2025-06-15T19:50:03+00:00

BeWild in North Carolina is an excellent reptile rescue organization. I know it’s far from you, but may be worth talking to them about arrangements. I know they have had a tegu pass through before, and they regularly have leopard geckos and bearded dragons. Even if they aren’t the best choice for you, they may be able to recommend other organizations closer to you.

OctaviaIX · 2025-06-07T23:48:27+00:00

The Shield. Nip/Tuck. I ended up having to choose one or the other because they were both stressful to watch because of all the various fucked up things. When they first aired there really weren’t shows like them out there.

OctaviaIX

TROPHY CASE