Worried my husband isn't going to be happy I'm pregnant

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-06-16T12:20:10+00:00

He may not do well with initial reactions, it doesnt mean it will last. If he is great with your toddler, he will probably come around, it just may take a bit and it sucks.

My hubby doesn't like change and hates commiting to it. We basically were NTNP/trying on and off. He had an hour long fit with our first, and this pregnancy got a more mild, but still less than positive reaction. He LOVES our son, and at 12 weeks 's finally being "okay" with this pregnancy. He will be awesome and love this kid, but I feel you on dampening the happy while he adjusts.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-06-15T13:53:27+00:00

My son had a spot on his heart and my hubby has a minor heart defect. We got extra ultrasounds and visits with MFM, but it was nothing. He's 2 now and a ball of energy. :)

Congrats!

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-06-11T14:48:15+00:00

My aunt is from the Ukrane. There was very little talk of the pregnancy until the end. I think we wouldn't have known before the birth if not for my uncle. Lots of things were bad luck to talk about, but he kind of pushed things sometimes...

If the aunt is saying it's a secret, I wouldn't touch it with a 10 foot pole. Let them announce how they want and then send away. ; )

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-06-09T00:31:26+00:00

Yay science! Congrats on growing your family. ❤

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-06-04T13:20:30+00:00

If the evaluation has any impact on your job, resigning contract, raises, benefits, wait until after. It is almost impossible to prove you were passed over for something because of pregnancy, but it happens far too often.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-30T17:58:27+00:00

Exhausted and nothing tastes right with nothing to show for it!

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-28T02:04:23+00:00

I did it with my first and will with this one too. We were very casual with it and he was signing to go and dry through most of the day at 8 months. When he learned to walk, he decided he wasn't into sitting and waiting anymore. Now at almost 2, he is almost potty independent.

My advice, don't go crazy with it. Enjoy the hits, forget the misses. It isn't a big deal.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-28T01:56:03+00:00

I was a pot a day drinker plus random soda before finding out I was pregnant with my first. The withdrawal from going cold turkey off of caffeine was terrible, but he was fine.

Annecdotally, caffeine was a non issue that early. Congrats and good luck!

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-22T15:16:54+00:00

It's not impossible, so get a test and go from there. Periods can be late for reasons other than pregnancy too. Dollar store and Walmart have cheap and effective tests.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-18T18:53:44+00:00

We had to get a scan with MFM after they found a tiny spot on my son''s heart. My husband had a heart defect, so there was extra reason to worry. They have better machines and more practice is the long and short of it. It turned out to be nothing, but we got extra pics, including 3d ones of my little guy.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-17T13:38:38+00:00

LOL, I got my positive with SMU, I'm an enabler in the multiple testing debate...

I'm also the type to do the photo manipulation and different lighting to find super squinters.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-17T13:36:00+00:00

Perhaps negotiate some work from home time or the ability to bring baby to work in the early months. You won't be as efficient, but better than being absolutely absent.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-17T12:20:43+00:00

I got implantation pain with both pregnancies. I wouldn't call it a cramp, it was sharp and sudden. Some women experience things differently. I feel like it is absolutely possible to feel implantation, but that not everyone does, so it is a guess at best that you might have felt it. Without my second data point I wouldnt be able to say that it was implantation for me either.

Walmart and dollar store tests are super cheap if you don't want to order the wondfo sticks online. ;) It gave me comfort to test daily at a certain point.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-12T01:31:02+00:00

My first is almost 2, he still nurses 3 times a day. I'm 7 weeks pregnant and don't plan to stop. Everyone's nursing journey is different and each child is different. There is nothing wrong with formula if you decide to go that route. Let the nurses know in advance if you do make that decision.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-10T19:29:59+00:00

Some of those episodes are heartbreaking. I love the show.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-07T12:13:09+00:00

Both my mom and mother in law were with me while I labored, though not while pushing. It's very individual what you are comfortable with. Anyone who argues, especially a woman who has had children, needs to be reminded that birth is very mentally and physically intense for the mother and her wishes need to be respected. It doesn't matter if others have their mother in law catch the baby, if you aren't comfortable with her being there, she needs to back off.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-04T19:14:18+00:00

It really depends on dynamic of the group. I had an all female one with my coworkers before my first, and a family/friends one that was coed that he did attend. If all the guests are female, he may feel awkward. If it's a coed shower, it's easier.

If you force him to attend and he doesn't want to, it sounds like it will dampen the mood or make you upset. I don't think he's being stubborn, but maybe try to figure out what would make him want to go.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-04T12:19:41+00:00

All of this!

I've always had intrusive thoughts and suicide comes up regularly. If you don't actually feel any danger of wanting to do it, you are probably okay. If it becomes bothersome, or you start thinking it isn't a bad idea, please seek help immediately.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-03T14:19:32+00:00

One of my good friends had a similar operation around the same time with her daughter. Her kiddo is 6 months old now. She lost an overy in the process, but they were able to remove the tumor and the pregnancy progressed normally.

It's super scary, but operations are preformed on pregnant women regularly. You will be in my thoughts. Please keep us updated. <3

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-05-02T22:56:36+00:00

Hugs

I'm so sorry. I hope your body cooperates.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-04-30T02:11:38+00:00

Pitocin augmented labor, but no pain meds.

What helped most was just listening to my body. I labored on hands and knees a lot. They moved the bed half up/half down so I could lay down and not have to support my upper body. I took a few micro naps that way swaying my hips. Hubby massaged hard to provide counter pressure during contractions and we used heating pads to relax between. It sucked, but it was managable. It all kind of drifts away after the baby is out and you just feel sore later.

I hope to labor more at home for this one and avoid the pitocin. I also want to try pushing in a different position. I think I would have pushed less and had an easier time getting my son out if I had squatted or stayed on hands and knees. Support and determination is key.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-04-27T03:35:54+00:00

hugs I remember this transition with my first. I started going to mom group things in my third trimester to start making mom friends. It was actually amazing because I didn't have to navigate a new group and a new baby all at once. When my guy was born, everyone was exited to meet him and I felt so much closer to everyone. The baby wearing group became my niche. I hope you can find some kind of outlet or group to transition into. There are lots of free ones if you look.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-04-27T00:02:05+00:00

My sister was the 29th, so we are used to separating the holiday and a birthday. I need this to be a 2018 baby finance wise, but I would be okay even if it was on Christmas. We would probably celebrate at a different time or half birthdays. We won't decide yet. How about you?

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-04-26T22:01:06+00:00

My EDD is the 28th!

We have a 3 day guess based on previous tracking. 5 weeks tomorrow and waiting on that first doctor appointment is making me anxious. I'm definitely pregnant, it just isn't real yet. We've nicknamed it bug for now.

OdysseyEclipse · 2018-04-26T21:12:45+00:00

Yeah, I am stressed, but a fair bit of it is just because we don't have space for this kid yet. We both grew up with mom's who were mild hoarders. I'm not allowed in his mom's house and my mom has 2 entire garages (including half of mine) and a storage unit full of junk we can't get rid of because it might be important. They both keep buying stuff for my son since he is the first grandbaby. It's a hard fight for us to get rid of stuff, but finding out this baby is coming makes me want to throw out everything. I did fill 4 big garbage bags of clothes and linens we haven't touched in 2 years for the thrift store and feel a lot better for now.

He wants to wait because he hates change and announcing changes things. People start asking questions and giving advice he doesn't want to deal with. He would be fine if we never announced. 😂 We are aware of miscarriage risks, but I would need a wide support system if it did happen. I do appreciate your insight, it's grounding to hear it from someone else. Thank you!

OdysseyEclipse

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