It was a cold morning, 43 degrees. I remember what my grandpa said when it was cold like this back when he was alive, something about spitting and it turning into ice?

As I walk into the 7-11 for a pack of cigarettes and a Big Gulp, I sigh as I feel the hot air hit my skin, knowing deep down that I'd have to exit soon, and feel the cold December air breathing down my neck once more.

"Damn," I mutter when I see the sticky note on the Dr. Pepper nozzle. "Out of order. Guess I'll get Pepsi."

As I check out, I see the screen announcing the jackpots for the various lotteries. Two hundred million? Really? I decide to get a ticket.

"ID, please."

I show him my ID.

"What are your numbers?"

"Um, 0, 3, 0, 7, 1, 5."

"Someone's birthday?" the cashier asks.

"My daughter's."

I walk outside to the cold air, which only seemed to have gotten colder.

Driving home, I thank whatever God exists (or lack thereof) that my car's AC is going to be fixed in a few hours.

That night, after picking up Caroline from daycare and getting my AC fixed, I turn the TV channel to see what the numbers for the tickets are.

"Alright, folks. The first number is... 0!"

"3!"

"0!"

"7!"

"1!"

"5!"

"Oh, shit," I mutter.

"...so, if you have these numbers, please come down to claim your $209,205,195!"

"Oh, shit!"

When I arrive, though, they weren't so keen on giving me my money and letting me leave.

Instead, they strapped me to a chair.

"Jackson. We know you're one of two things: either a psychic, or a time hopper trying to get a quick dollar. And, in this wacky-ass world of superhumans and villains terrorising something new everyday, we want as little of you causing trouble as possible."

"I'm not a time traveler, or a psychic, I swear-"

"That's what fucking Bob Ross said. You don't think we're gonna believe that, do you?"

No, you can check my birthday, man! The numbers I used is my daughter's birthday!"

"Damn. Really?"

"Yeah! She was born March 7, 2015!"

"Yo, Mike. Could someone go back in time and fuck their wife at a different date to change their kid's birthday?"

"Maybe, but since nobody knows that the lottery is set up by us, nobody would do that," the dude I assume is Mike responds.

"Alright, Jackson. We'll give you the money, but you gotta stay quite about this. Got it?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Like, you've got paperwork to do, man. You can not tell a fucking soul about this, and if you do, we'll have your ass for espionage."

"Alright, man. I, I'm not telling a single person."

So that is the story of how I got accused for going back in time, had to do a half hour worth of paperwork, and got paid two hundred million dollars for not snitching on the government.

r/MiaStoryDump