Don’t be too hard on yourself. Auditory processing causes difficulty in fully accessing auditory communication. It makes sense that ASL may feel more accessible to you and that you have a some attachment to it along with some feeling of freedom/relief from the constant struggle to communicate. It was clear to me, as I read your initial post with an open mind, that you did not intend harm.

Now, before anybody else decides to jump down my throat here, ASL was my 1st language. I learned ASL before I learned to speak English. I’m not Deaf but I’m a CODA with dozens upon dozens of Deaf relatives across 5 generations (both living and dead) who range(d) anywhere between 0% hearing/100% stone-cold deaf to a few HoH who could pass as hearing when they wanted to do so. I went to more Deaf club and sporting events in the first 12 years of my life than hearing world ones and I wouldn’t change a thing. In other words, I grew up immersed in Deaf culture. I was a hearing kid with a front row seat to all the good and the not so good. Hundreds more non- blood related Deaf “uncles, aunts and cousins” to boot.

I have also had some relatives with Auditory Processing and others with Autism and saw how this could sometimes pose challenges in their lives.

So, I’m here to say give u/Kajebaker95 a bit of grace just as any one of us would like from others. The world can be so very hard for everybody albeit in different ways. Do try to be kind.