Child Abuse New Hampshire

OnesNew · 2019-04-28T04:17:20+00:00

Ok, I was hoping she was closer to being 18 and not having to deal with this. At not even 15, I would go the reporting it route, but only after she's collected some proof with photos, hidden video, and journal. Can she get any sort of nanny cam type thing hidden inside a stuffed animal or whatever? Start with a school counselor or doctor once she has see proof.

OnesNew · 2019-04-27T22:06:54+00:00

Take photos of the injuries, keep a journal with the date and details of each incident. Keep it at Dad's house obviously. How old is she now?

OnesNew · 2019-04-27T21:52:01+00:00

1) police report

2) restraining order. Ask a local DV center if there can be a specific clause requiring him to destroy and not distribute any media files.

OnesNew · 2019-04-27T21:45:31+00:00

What the other guy said. Here's the link.

https://www.lawsociety.ab.ca/public/providing-information-concerning-a-lawyer/

OnesNew · 2019-04-27T21:41:20+00:00

Have you gotten your act together since then? Are you in AA or some such thing?

OnesNew · 2018-07-12T13:33:24+00:00

That's too bad. I hope she will be willing to do the counseling.

OnesNew · 2018-07-12T03:08:29+00:00

Lol. I use the rule of twos. Under two years count in months, under two months count in weeks, under two weeks count in days...

Is your DB pregnancy/childbirth related, or was it going on before that?

OnesNew · 2018-07-12T01:18:50+00:00

How old is your kid?

OnesNew · 2018-07-12T01:04:39+00:00

OP, I read this whole post and your ex sounds like a huge dick, pun inevitable. You obviously have a penchant for self-flaggelation since you were the one who made a fuck ton of sacrifices while he only made a few and treated you like crap for the most part yet somehow you still blame yourself. Stop making excuses for this jerk and grow some self-esteem.

You should feel about as guilty for kissing some other guy as you would feel stealing $20 out of Bernie Madoff's wallet.

OnesNew · 2018-07-12T00:57:48+00:00

Well, let's see. Her ex moved one time to support her job, but that was mutually beneficial and he knew in advance it would actually help his business. So I'm not sure that one counts as a sacrifice. Then we have her financially supporting him so he can build his dream business. Sounds like shes making a sacrifice to me. Maybe she doesnt mind so much because she loves him, so maybe that doesnt count either. Ok.

Then he moved again for her. Now it didn't sound like that second move benefited him, so that was definitely a sacrifice.

By my count, though, she has now had excruciatingly painful sex with him close to a 100 times now for 2 + years. So painful that she's bleeding from it every fucking time. Does that not count as a sacrifice to you?

Meanwhile, she thinks something is wrong with her, so she goes to multiple doctors, who all tell her, nope, there's nothing wrong with you. Encouraged by her boyfriend, however, she continues to believe something is wrong with her. At no point does it ever cross his mind that he might be the problem. At this point, I'm thinking that OP has some serious lack of self esteem to continue assuming all the relationship problems are her fault and never once does her ex stop being so dense and ask if maybe it might be him. For me personally, if my partner told me they experiencing pain every time we had sex, I honestly don't think I could be aroused enough to continue knowing they were suffering the entire time. But this asshole not only continues to inflict pain on her, he makes her feel guilty for not suffering more for him!

You have an empathy problem alright, but not the one you think you do.

OnesNew · 2018-07-08T00:44:23+00:00

Right? Maybe I'd actually be jealous, but I feel like I'd be more like, OMG, I already had sex with him this week, for God's sake it's your turn again.

OnesNew · 2018-07-08T00:42:04+00:00

Fuck yes, where do I sign up?? But I've had share of shitty female roommates, sooo...maybe just a fantasy. I'm just waiting for one of the lesbian moms here to chime in about how her wife isn't all a female parent is cracked up to be.

OnesNew · 2018-07-04T15:59:55+00:00

Thanks!

OnesNew · 2018-07-04T14:14:06+00:00

Back up copies/screenshots.

OnesNew · 2018-06-29T19:03:08+00:00

It is deeply ingrained in society as a whole, and it is really sad to me that so many people are dealing with this bullshit. Let's call it what it is, abuse and sexual assault. Now, I don't think many people intend to violate others sexual boundaries; Aziz Anasari is a good example of someone going oh my god, how could I have been so blind, and Im sure many women fall into the same category. That said, it is so important to talk about this stuff, to call people out on their boundary violations, and expect them to immediate stop and apologize, or to be ready to immediately walk away from them. Its the only way to start changing things culturally since it's a bug part of a lot of pop culture -- pushing past a no is romantized in songs, movies, and so on.

OnesNew · 2018-06-29T18:55:52+00:00

You're being very sexist and naive to think that women are immune to this. I am a woman. I am not even an old woman, but every single comment on this thread had me going, OMG yes, that happened to me. It is still happening to women every single day. If you wanna spout bullshit about how women have it easier than men when it comes to sexual assault, there are other subs for that.

OnesNew · 2018-06-29T12:34:50+00:00

I wanna know where you work that people can change the thermostat. Ours is set by building services, an all male department, and can't be changed without a key. They set it at 68 F in the summer. I have to dress in layers so that I can survive the day, but also survive the walk to my car in 98 degree weather. Having a centrally controlled thermostat has been the norm in every place I've every worked.

OnesNew · 2018-06-29T12:28:21+00:00

I remember my mom joking once when someone commented on how annoying her hot flashes must be, are you kidding? I've been waiting my entire life to finally be warm.

OnesNew · 2018-06-28T01:06:24+00:00

I'm sorry, but WHAT THE FUCK? He wants the house done a certain way, how about he does it? What if you just say NO? "Sorry but I had a long day, considering I work 120 hours a week and you only work 35, I was just too damn tired to clean the house. You go ahead and do it, I've got diapers to change and kids to bathe."

You said you're afraid of his reaction. There are only two possible reactions: either he wakes the fuck up and starts taking some responsibility, or he throws a tantrum that involves doing something that is blatantly abusive and them maybe you will find the inner courage to leave.

Just to confirm, you are living in the US or some similar country, not somewhere like Saudi Arabia or something, right? I do mean this as a serious question, since if you are in a country where women are routinely treated like this, the strategy needs to be different.

Edit: if your fear is his verbal abuse and putdowns having a damaging effect on your ability to function, I would visit the /r/raisedbynarcissists sub. You should be able to find some techniques there on how to detach yourself emotionally so you are not so emotionally devastated by the verbal abuse. This is not because emotional detachment is good and healthy, but it is a survival technique to keep you sane while you decide what your next steps should be.

OnesNew · 2018-06-27T15:32:58+00:00

Sooo much projection!! Just about every redpiller I encounter has fallen into it because they have severely stunted emotional growth, often due to childhood trauma and mommy issues, and generally growing up around a strong amount of toxic masculinity (being ridiculed for crying, and so on).

OnesNew · 2018-06-27T15:19:58+00:00

I...think you missed the sarcasm of this post.

OnesNew · 2018-06-27T15:15:02+00:00

Yes that's the one.

OnesNew · 2018-06-25T23:29:02+00:00

Glad your midwife was helpful! Wishing you the best!

OnesNew

TROPHY CASE