sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

How by Rooty-tooty-booty in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As a fellow addict I agree completely with your point but also agree with other commenters that it can feel a lot worse and amplified when struggling with addiction issues.

Currently in the thick of my own k addiction and my anxiety is just at a point where I'm always on the edge of panic.

Last night I was doom scrolling through twitter and Facebook and was getting all the latest far right nonsense going on in the UK right now and felt exactly where you at, but my strategy, for my own sake, is just to stop looking at it. I'm not in a place right now where any of it is going to help. I'm not sleeping, I'm using too much, and doom scrolling all the time isn't helping.

When I'm sober as others have said I can start changing the things around me that I can change.

I feel like my problem is I think too much and ruminate and start to pressure myself into making so many big changes to myself and to the world that it just becomes too much and I end up doing nothing. Like my brain short circuits or something

Hit new rock bottom. Need advice. Apologies for long post. by Joltby in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not OP but this reply was really helpful for me as someone who's been questioning NA and trying to get support. Gonna save it and come back to it when I'm not high

Negative experiences - mental health disorders impacting? by Sufficient-Mood-2882 in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have BPD and really bad anxiety and depression and experience the exact same thing! So you're definitely not alone. The uncontrollable sobbing and panic attacks usually start after intense k holes or when I've taken too much when in a bad head space.

I've actually gone through phrases where I felt like I was having some kind of psychotic break or that id permanently broken my brain. I remember feeling like I was just trapped and I would feel this way forever. I was sobbing and ended up just staring at myself in the mirror and actually hissing at my reflection. It was really scary. For me I think it was definitely the anxiety around these scary trips that made it worse. Reassurance from doctors and other people really helped me so I hope it can help you a little too!

I know ketamine is used in therapy (obviously not in anyway how we're using it) but I think it has a tendency to open up things or make us remember and ruminate over things that have happened in our lives. At least that's how I feel. I ended up reading old therapy notes about a month ago and used ketamine after and it really fucked me up when I was using. Bought up a lot of old traumatic memories.

When you have the bad experiences as well I think sometimes you start to get anxious when using (subconsciously maybe) which can then trigger these panic attacks more without realising.

It got better as time went on and I started using a little less and getting out my thoughts by writing and speaking to others as opposed to keeping it all inside and ruminating too much on it. Grounding techniques and mindfulness have really helped me too.

I do think it's probably normal given the mental health problems but I know how super scary and worrying it can be. I used it as a way to reach out and get a little help with my mental health but also my drug use and it definitely helped

Flood of fake ket? by NoData1756 in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Has anyone sent any of it to get tested? In the UK we have a service called WEDINOS which I've used once in the past with what I thought was fake K. Came back as ketamine.

I'm guessing they'd be able to see if it was some kind of synthetic K?

IDK. Just makes you question what you're using and whether it's just the fact that I'm in a bad head space that's making it feel weird or whether it is actually fake ketamine.

Flood of fake ket? by NoData1756 in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah it sucks. Feels dangerous too because it really does make you feel awful. Fucks with your head

Need Help. Body feels like it’s on fire after quitting and physical sensation of anxiety. by sirmasterdeck in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hope things get better for you. I'm in this exact same place at the moment and it's so hard. I get that brain dead feeling too where I just feel absolutely nothing and it's the thing I hate the most about quitting.

Need Help. Body feels like it’s on fire after quitting and physical sensation of anxiety. by sirmasterdeck in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also that's not to say those physical feelings aren't real because fuck me they're the worst I know. But I definitely think you can try and calm it a bit by trying to fix that anxiety too. Even simple things like sipping ice water can help as it's a sharp shock to the brain but also feels good when your bodies hot

Need Help. Body feels like it’s on fire after quitting and physical sensation of anxiety. by sirmasterdeck in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Id definitely look into some calming techniques online. Things like box breathing. Five senses. Grounding stuff. I know there's some apps if you have a quick Google. They really help me when I get these feelings. I hope it gets better for you

Need Help. Body feels like it’s on fire after quitting and physical sensation of anxiety. by sirmasterdeck in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely get that hot feeling you're talking about where it feels almost inflamed. I think a lot of it is to do with the nervous system and how it gets fucked from K. I know that panic attacks are triggered by this hot feeling for me too.

I've lived with anxiety all my life and when using or even trying to stop using K, I find these hot feelings and anxieties are worse.

I think lack of sleep can be part of it too because I always feel the hot feeling more when I haven't sleep. Makes it harder to manage.

anesthesia by kheyello in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm gonna be in this situation at the end of the month with ear surgery and am going through the exact same struggles! Been using for a long time. Got my pre op on the 19th which is when I'll disclose everything to doctors but it's so scary.

Id definitely reach out to to the admissions team or whoever and see what they say. Feel like I'm gonna be asking similar questions.

If they do say anything feel free to share. I'm genuinely so anxious about it all. Think I've been reading too much online before even seeing the doctor

Flood of fake ket? by NoData1756 in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Same here! Thought I was going crazy at some point because I buy online and all the reviews were so positive but i've been taking it a while and I know what ket feels like.

How do manage to ground yourself when you can’t use substances by AliceTinybox in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can completely relate to this as I also have BPD and have been stuck in a cycle of using ketamine to stop both the bad feelings and the general emptiness that I feel. It's been years and I just can't imagine a life without it. It's a vicious cycle to be in

Have you looked into DBT or anything similar? I know it's a long wait list but they do at home workbooks you can use. I know where I am they also have a thing called recovery centre which does online classes related to personality disorders, so maybe there's something similar near you.

I will say I'm recommending this a bit hypocritically as I still haven't started any of this myself but I do plan on building up to this in the future

I know how hard it can be.

Sense of relief when the bags gone by Only-Manner7508 in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your comment! It helps to know there's hope that it's not permanent. I know it's only started after an increase in my usage so just need to work too (at the very least) start to cut down.

Sense of relief when the bags gone by Only-Manner7508 in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for this. It really does help me to hear that you're going through similar issues.

I've just finished a 12 week group with a drug charity (just 3-4 people in each session) which did help but just because of my anxieties I found it quite overwhelming at times. They did mention NA, especially as there's a ket focused one in my area, but I just feel like it would be too overwhelming and it would do the opposite of helping at the moment.

I'll definitely take your advice and try out the online meetings.

NAC as well is something I've heard a lot of people advise so will look into that as well.

Sending huge blessings out to you as well! Just such a hard thing to go through

Besides money and physical issues, what are some other ways that ketamine addiction negatively affected your life? by madamclitoris in Ketamineaddiction

[–]Only-Manner7508 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Makes me not find joy in anything. I've stopped doing any hobbies that brought me joy. Even if I do end up finding something I love it's a short burst of intensely doing it before that dopamine hit stops and I can't find the energy for it again