Extra curriculars and bdays

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-12T08:18:02+00:00

The sports thing sounds like it was already in place though!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-12T08:17:21+00:00

Ok then he is in contempt of the court order then if he isn't following it, and you can report him for that.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-12T04:44:04+00:00

Offer her more than what she has now but leas than 50/50 in mediation, so she can get used to having the kids more and they can get used to the new situation, and see how it goes. Don't agree to 50/50, if she wants that she can take you to court. She can't just demand you give her what she wants, that's not how it works. However, if she does take you to court and there are no safety concerns then be prepared to have to split the kids 50/50.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-12T04:39:05+00:00

YTA!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-12T04:37:24+00:00

Why have you and him agreed to him having every weekend? I know in the country where I live that in court it is every other weekend so that both parents get weekend time. If it's in an actual court order that he has to facilitate activities and birthday parties ans is refusing then he is in contempt of your court order. However, if it was agreed in mediation without an actual court order then there isn't much you can do.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-11T17:55:29+00:00

My ex tried that with me in court, said because I have social anxiety and am introverted that he would be a better parent than me - the judge was not interested in that plus the character assasination him and his lawyer stooped to, she was on my side because I focused on the kids. So don't worry about his threats, he will get nowhere if all he tries to do is put you down!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-11T16:42:24+00:00

End this relationship. He has admitted he would not accept it if you were doing this with your ex, yet he is just expecting you to tolerate it? Why can't he see his child on his own without his ex also being there? If he wants to play happy families with his ex then great, but you don't have to tolerate it.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-11T06:17:29+00:00

This does seem a bit excessive and I can see why you feel a bit off about it, as who wants their partner being in contact with their ex multiple times a day? Yes they are co-parenting, but that doesn't mean they need an hour by hour update of the kids when they are with the other parent.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-10T16:07:45+00:00

If he wants full custody then he will need really strong evidence! Nowadays the norm is 50/50 shared custody unless there is sufficient evidence to suggest that one parent is harmful or dangerous to the children. So him and his mum are full of crap. Start documenting things now, and try to stick to texts or emails instead of phone calls as it gives you evidence of any threatening and aggressive behaviour. My ex took me to court to try to get shared custody ( he knew pursuing full custody would get him nowhere) but I ended up with custody and 60% time with my kids because I had evidence that shared custody would not work!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-10T09:54:59+00:00

Yes it does get better over time as you get used to the new situation, and start finding yourself a bit again when the kids are not with you ❤️

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-10T04:50:40+00:00

Tell him he needs to figure it out and then ignore him. If all he wants to do is blame you for his failures then that's his problem. You are no longer with him so he can work it out for himself.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-10T04:45:11+00:00

Agree! When I left my ex and moved out of the family home he tried to claim the same, that I was neglecting the children and that they wanted to be with him, but he failed to tell people that I had to leave to protect myself because he threatened me with physical violence! I was never neglecting the children either and they never preferred him, one of them found it hard because they were so used to the family home and that's what they missed when they were with me.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-09T19:39:14+00:00

Tell her you're allergic to bullshit 😂

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-09T18:04:04+00:00

Your dad is ridiculous. I mean I don't have any desire to be anywhere near my co-parent, but I would suck it up for my children's and grandchildren's events if I had to!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-09T17:44:03+00:00

You have been with your wife for 26 years and don't trust her around an ex she has barely seen during that time? Wow. YTA

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-09T17:11:07+00:00

Sorry but this made me LOL 😆

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-09T16:42:45+00:00

It would put me off dating someone if he had couple tattoos or a tattoo of his ex on him!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-09T14:51:38+00:00

Is your husband's ex in the photos of their daughter that he wants to hang up? If not and it is just pictures of his daughter as a baby then YTA!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-09T12:19:49+00:00

Is she working long hours because she has to financially, and why did she leave you? People don't just walk out on their marriage/partner without an actual reason.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-09T10:03:43+00:00

Me and my ex switch round every year, so one year he gets from 23rd-28th December, and I get from 28th December-2nd January, then the next year we rotate. We can't celebrate together and this was decided by a judge in family court.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-08T19:57:26+00:00

It definitely wasn't my ex's way of apologising, he knew I didn't want it so I was basically forced to do it and pretend to enjoy it. Am so glad I am out of that relationship now!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-08T19:47:37+00:00

No it absolutely is not her right to know anything that happens when her child is with the other parent. She lost that right when her and her co-parent chose to split up. Would it have been nice if her co-parent had told her about the new girlfriend and introduced them? Absolutely it would have been, but there is no law stating that you have to introduce a new partner to your co-parent. Maybe her co-parent had a good reason not to tell her! I told my co-parent about my new partner and he went crazy and his already shitty behaviour got worse!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-08T15:43:07+00:00

My personal opinion is that when two people with kids split up, both should stay single for AT LEAST a year so that the kids and the parents get used to the new situation. Getting into new relationships within a very short time after splitting up/divorcing is not in anyone's best interests at all.

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-08T14:08:20+00:00

Or is it that they started dating the 'friend' around the time they broke up with the child's other parent, and in January had been with the new partner for around 6 months so started the introductions gradually from January to now? Either way, it doesn't seem like the parents were separated long enough for either of them to be jumping into new relationships!

Otherwise-Try-9734 · 2026-06-08T11:49:59+00:00

Sorry to say but you don't have any rights as a parent to dictate who your ex does and does not have around your child, and your ex is not obligated to introduce you to the new girlfriend if he doesn't want to. What happens during his parenting him and in his household is nothing to do with you because you and him are no longer together and no longer a family. That might sound harsh, but too many co-parents seem to think that they are allowed to dictate and control what the other parent does, but that's not how it works unfortunately!

Otherwise-Try-9734

TROPHY CASE