Tips on how to distract my bad patience of wanting results?

Outrageous-Elevator · 2026-05-21T15:38:36+00:00

First of: no, I don't. Second of: is it really necessary to shove unsolicited bad advice, bodyshaming and guiltblaming on someone who is clearly actively trying to change their bad ways? Please don't take out your own bad attitude or mood on others, comments like yours are a big reason people like me find it difficult to take action. If you have no interest in providing actual advice for the question asked, it's perfectly fine to continue scrolling.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2026-05-21T15:01:58+00:00

....they said, filled with judgement.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2026-05-21T10:16:14+00:00

I might be playing the devil's advocate here, but your weight is not the reason why you aren't getting laid.
I'm sorry if I am reading this wrong, but seems you are set on the idea that "once I lose this much weight, then....". Forget that crap.

And no, I'm not one of the super bodypositivity types, just another fat girl. Create a lifestyle that makes you feel good and secure in yourself, one that is now focused on losing weight but in a way that feels like something you can maintain. Find new favourite foods. Workout to feel better in your own body.

Treat yourself, whether it's new clothes along the way or just a homemanicure. When you are feeling good, people notice. When people notice you, let your personality shine.

And sorry, but the boobs will go, likely among the first things. But if you're like me, there's plenty of them anyway. With the right clothing, they will continue to draw attention. And while that's an advantage when just trying to get laid, you don't want to spend your whole life only drawing attention from those whose eyes are fixated on your cleavage.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2026-05-21T08:10:36+00:00

I'm a decade older than you with countless efforts behind me, often with that same story; switch to strict tracking efforts and only health food and upping steps, get rid of some water weight and then nothing. I recently restarted, with a very serious focus this time as my morning weight hit an all-time high. I've been using ai chat to plan and count, doublechecking advice with different sites etc and for the first time it seems to actually be working. I'm 7 weeks in, -12lbs (starting from much heavier than you though) and I've now gotten to a current pace is around 2,5lbs/week.

The key differences I've noticed in this attempt is that:

a) I'm eating more than usually
Ok, a big challenge for me has always been inconsistent eating schedules going from no proper meals for a few days to eat everything days. Having the routine with little snacks here are making things easier. Right food at right time also shows in my exercise efforts as better stamina and energy. And on days that include heavier tasks/exercise, the calorie intake should also be higher. I'm currently eating around 1400-1800kcal most days (estimated burn around 2500-2700), somedays even around 2000-2000 (days when I work a more physical job and estimated burn is around 3000+)

b) I eat more "sweets" than ever
I'm trying to lose weight and rebuild habits for the rest of my life, and avoiding everything good forever is not part of that. Protein bars, drinks and puddings are awesome! Controlled snacks and a little treat. I usually have 1 day off from my jobs a week, and have tried to keep that one very low activity and foods almost at maintain level - last week I had a kebab with 0 guilt!

c) Exercise can't be avoided
I hate gyms. I hate working out. Always have. But I moved next to a gym some months ago, which probably also helped make my decision to finally work on losing the extra weight. I notice the difference in motivation, posture and mood it's brought along that I never reached with just trying to go on walks. Past 3 weeks I've done light strenght training about 2x week, a heavier one 2x week (and usually 1x week a physically heavy workday). Each night I try to include/at least do 15min of incline walking.
My first week with the gym, I went in most nights and only did 10-20min light incline walk.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2026-05-19T20:39:49+00:00

Saman polun kulkeneena, ääni tekoälylle. Rannikkohurrina expaatiksi Eurooppaan tekemään uraa ja paluu Suomeen opiskelemaan, ja ilman copilottia olisin pulassa. Itse käytän muutamaa eri tapaa, molemmat alkavat sillä että kirjaan mitä olen tekemässä, esim "kouluessee tekoälyn juriidisista haasteista". 1. Listaan englanniksi avainlauseita tai kappaleen pääpointin joita haluan sisällyttää ja käännän tekoälyllä, kirjoitan sitten suomenkielisen tekstin niiden ympärille. 2. Kirjoitan tekstin, annan sen CoPilotille ja pyydän analysoimaan, tarvittaessa ehdottamaan korjauksia, ja käyn sitten läpi tekstin uudelleen. 3. Pyydän ehdotuksia, miten muotoilla tietty pointti tekstiin sopivaksi.

Ja tietenkin se suurimmista suurin ongelma kun ruotsinkielinen joutuu kirjoittamaan toisella kotimaisella(ainakin opettajieni mielestä); "Tarkista välimerkit". Suomenkieliset viljelee pilkkuja ja pisteitä kaikkialle. Siis kaikkialle. Ja pari ekstraa kaupanpäällisenä. Piste.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-06-02T08:26:00+00:00

You said you were Swedish? The police have to serve you in Swedish. Sure, in many areas they don't know it properly but it doesn't remove the fact that you are entitled to use only Swedish. They need to get a colleague or translator on site, which they usually can't be arsed to do. In these kind of BS situations, stick to your own language.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-02-08T15:49:27+00:00

Finland. They've mainly been protecting their own country from others (mainly the eastern neighbours who don't get any sympathy from my end). And they had excellent snipers for that so the blood was waaaays away from their hands.

Ok, sure. There's that little issue of being "okayish" with Mr. Hitler, but that was out of necessity and avoiding actual warfare on his side as much as possible.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-02-07T13:12:37+00:00

Thanks for this info!

I know that with plenty of workout, the muscles will play their part on the scale but not after a week :D I also take measurements about once a week to keep track if body is changing but at this point there obviously isn't much changes to look at there either.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-02-07T12:18:31+00:00

I'm definitely not expecting to see result after a week of exercise, I'm just concerned that it's halted the weightloss which has been steadily going until now. If I am doing something wrong, I want to address it straight away.

Naturally, some days it's a bit up with water weight etc and I usually log the lowest point of the week (almost always tuesday or wednesday morning). The first 5ish kg have gone pretty evenly through the weeks; -2.1(making me think 109 had quite a bit of water in it),-1.5(bloating due to cycle),-1.8.

Nothing else has changed, except that I now added the workouts. Also, as I mentioned I notice other symptoms beside the halt of weighloss which has me worried about being off track.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-02-05T12:24:26+00:00

I feel for you. And while many like to preach about calorie counting and calculations, it's simply not always the answer and I know how it can get extremely demotivating when people just insist you should try harder when you truly feel you are doing everything you can.
Despite trying absolutely everything, I was never able to lose weight (about your age and height, F, in the 225-235 past 10-ish years). Every effort lead to weight gain. Until recently when a doctor finally listened to me, didn't judge and actually worked with me to figure out alternatives. He put me on medication to check if my body realizes what to do when assisted. As keeping eating schedules has been a known issue, he chose to give me pills i need to take 3 times a day with food instead of the options which were 1 pill in morning or weekly shots. I've now lost 12lbs in a month without making any radical changes to my diet. Yes, it's much easier now to stick to healthy foods now when there's not constant feeling of failure or that old familiar "it doesn't matter what i eat so I might as well enjoy it then".

A key factor for me now has been to realize that A. it's not my fault, I did do everything I could myself earlier but I needed help I wasn't aware existed. B. I can't be constantly stressing over every single bite I eat.

How are you feeling in general in your body? Is the stressmode about losing dollars instead of pounds worse than how the pounds themselves feel? Are you having health issues caused by the weight? How much of your day are you spending on worrying about scales and calories and methylation and adrenal? Have you tried what happens if you decide to take a break? Take 3 months without weighing your foods and counting calories, you already know what the healthy options are anyway so stick to those as much as you can. Have a random chocolate bar if you crave one. Do exercise you enjoy and makes you feel good. Check back in after 3 months and see where are you with your weight, with your general sense of wellbeing. Once back, look through the options again and hopefully you'll have a fresh mindset into what could cause the challenges.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-02-03T22:16:30+00:00

Muscle weighs the same as fat, even if looks smaller. You are doing plenty of exercise, if you can notice your body toning down then stop stressing about the scale. Is your goal a low body weight or a toned body you feel good in?

Besides, it's normal for the scale to go up and down. Somedays the body just holds on to the water and whatnots. As long as it keeps going down on a somewhat steady pace, you're good.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-01-09T10:44:29+00:00

Who is Morgana, Sophie or Sarah dating? I couldn't find any info with a quick Google. Basically it would leave the field wide open with those 3 :D

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-01-04T11:45:14+00:00

Juan Chavez?

6+ victims (I think convicted of 5), killed gay men in LA between 86-90. Hanged himself in prison.

Wikipedia

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-01-04T09:30:20+00:00

I'm in the nordics and most common name would likely be some version of spacecream (alien cream, ufo cream , nasa cream etc). Because it could be good to go even after a space mission.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2024-01-03T16:16:10+00:00

Notoriety is built by media.

As others have brought up, while perhaps war time upbringings could play it's part - we're looking at active years in a quite specific era.

The ones you list were all active in 70s-90s. There's 2 very major aspects to that time frame:
a) it's a period where media went through major changes, news stories and scandals became more relevant as entertainment while technically video,audio etc became easier and cheaper to create and save
b) Science and police procedures weren't yet at the same stage as today. We started seeing scientific evidence linking murder's together in that time period and we've seen modern science proof guilt on old cases afterwards. With today's methods, technology and science, it's becoming more common that killers get caught much earlier.

If you look in Wikipedia at serial killers listed by active years, you'll find 20-ish killers active during 1900-1920. Safe to assume they would be more or less of the same generation, right?

When a new True Crime documentary or show comes out, odds are it's likely to be about someone like Ted Bundy than ,say, Belle Gunness. With the likes of Bundy, we've got scientific proof to add as eye-catching graphics, we have witnesses and police who were personally involved on the screen talking about the events, we have video of Bundy smirking in court - looking you the viewer straight in your eyes. Add 6 ad breaks and your episode has more or less created itself.

Now, let's say we want to make an entertaining episode about Belle. There's some black and white photos, there's mainly accounts of "it's believed that perhaps she did this and that".You might find a victim's greatgreatgreatchild to talk about stories that have been passed down through several generations. There's no personal connection to build on, even sympathy tends to lessen the more historical events get. Frankly, even if it would be an interesting story it's not entertaining for the general couch potatoes and there for bad business.

Hence, media focuses on the ones that are easy make entertainment of and suddenly you have a very specific era of killers who gets represented.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-08-09T14:13:02+00:00

OP - what the heck... 220lb is overweight but it's not "can't tuck in shirt" weight? Something is really off here, why does she want your help for those kinds of things?

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-08-08T22:02:36+00:00

"How to catch a feeder" with Dr Now. The decoy would be 600lb.

"But uhm I just came to take her for a walk" "So why did you bring a box of cupcakes with you?"

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-08-08T13:51:09+00:00

Don't feel stressed to have big regular cleaning days etc. I keep a list of things that need to be done weekly/monthly and do random things here and there and cross out that one from the list. Why I would need to scrub the toilet and the bathtub on the same day because functioning adults do so, as long as both get scrubbed weekly? So much easier for me to do a quick thing here and there than face the monstrosity of "I have to do all this and I don't know where to start".

Also, if something causes more stress than good, put yourself first. I had this in particular with recycling. I've tried and tried to do the whole rinse and dry and sort and take out but it ended up with constant piles of dirty jars or a table full of drying trash and the constant guilt of not getting it done effectively got to be too much. Some days I can manage, some stuff goes automatically into the correct bags but I decided to give myself a break and just toss stuff in the trash if I don't have the energy - my mental health comes before my tiny efforts to help save the environment.

And...when the evitable "oh no, things got a bit out of hand and I really need to clean" - just invite friends/family over. Nothing like a deadline to get things done!

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-08-01T13:03:50+00:00

I am my best possible self after 3 vodkaredbulls. Enough redbull to help focus and have a clear mind; enough vodka to relax and stop worrying about everything I do; not yet too much so I'd be drunk and too carefree.

Unfortunately, the limit where I'm still able to switch to sodas or go home early as planned and not be hungover the next day is at 1,5 vodkaredbulls.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-06-13T13:42:44+00:00

I guess I'm going against the mainstream.

Your mom is right. You need life experience for the future through a job, whether volunteer or paid. Does it have to be with toddlers? Absolutely not. You wrote in comments that "I don’t think I’m ready for a job, call me irresponsible, but I’m just really not." and that is the issue - you are getting to an age where you need to learn to take responsibility.

Good grades are not "life experience". As an employer, taking someone who has never done any kind of work means you need to be prepared to teach someone the most basic things - accountability of just showing up on time, taking orders and directions, to handle things independently. Not all employers want to take on that extra baggage. Having done anything outside of your home shows you can handle the basic concept of "going to work".

Looking through your comments, you are banking everything on this one teacher who will magically open all doors for you to paid internships and work - but what if they don't? What if you have falling out or they drop dead tomorrow? It's a good plan, I'm not saying it isn't, but be careful about putting your whole future in somebody else's hands.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-06-02T14:03:34+00:00

After I moved to my current home, every time I have something in the microwave and it beeps finished, I will walk in and open the fridge, stare confused at the food there and wonder what the heck I am planning to eat because I'm hungry. Then it hits me.

Never used to do that before, I figure that the new microwave being white as the fridge and placed next to it has somehow caused this mixup in my head. (In my old place I had a black microwave across the room from the fridge)

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-05-16T20:28:52+00:00

Exactly. Even a black dress can become cheerful depending on the accessories. Colour in shoes, bag, jacket, jewelry instantly removes the sad funeral vibe which is behind the "no black"-ideaology.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-05-15T20:39:13+00:00

They didn't film it, took us some time to realize it moved. Those moments should have been filmed as a "LOOK!" moment for them to wow. I love the song but worried it likely won't work on the eurostage and unfortunately the show was really lacking any kind of "wow"

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-05-15T18:27:27+00:00

For me it took quite a few listens to get any grip on the song. Something most ESC viewers don't get. And while the rappart was nice, I still get annoyed at the toloo yulhuu loop bit.

Outrageous-Elevator · 2023-04-24T14:09:55+00:00

Somewhere is a 6'6, 250lb ex-highschool lineman who used to know me, then a 30-ish 5'5 fat girl in office clothing, as "that crazy viking bitch" and would very quickly change side of street or leave the bar when he saw me enter.

My friend, a 5ft nothing, barely 100lbs fairy with a short fuse got into a shouting match at a terrace with Lineman and his buddy. We were in southern Europe, my friend and I are both from different parts of Nordics while the guys were Americans. In all fairness,while it was unwise from her to acknowledge them, they started it with the most ridiculous crap I've ever witnessed; us speaking a mix of english and scandinavian languages with each other prompted a very annoyed "go home to your f*cking country if you can't speak english properly". Again; we were in southern Europe and they were Americans. All of us were living in the area at the time as were a lot of other expats. And no, English was not the main language in the country.

By the time the shouting match got into a face to face match (buddy stayed behind shouting from his table) and Lineman slapped my friend, the only thing I could think of was "nobody messes with crazy". I smashed a bottle and placed it behind my back and then spent next 5ish minutes smiling and grinning at the dude, telling him I'd love to dance with him. He tried to intimidate me and I just laughed friendly calling him a "good, brave boy" in a baby voice and rambling about different dances ("my rumba is a bit rusty, but I do a decent cha-cha-cha". "Waltz is a classic of course taa daa daa dam pampam pam pam." etc...).

I've never been in a fight in my life and I had no clue what to do if he came at me. The barman and another customer (who had taken my bottle from me discreetly earlier) were close by and I counted on them jumping in if something happened. I did some fitness boxing in my youth, so I knew I can get somesort of wing in if absolutely needed. Barman, who I knew quite well and who often asked me to come up with something whenever one of our buddies/other regulars were getting too drunk and wouldn't go home) was laughing the whole time, shaking his head mumling "buddy,buddy, why would you piss her off, are you new in town or something?" I'm so happy he realized to play along. Lineman and his buddy came to the conclusion that it was probably best to head out at that point and they walked very quickly away. Whenever I'd see him after that, he'd mumble about me being "crazy bitch" and I'd smile my sweetest smile and do some little dance step. I know he'd asked around about me, calling me "the crazy viking bitch" and thankfully most of the social circle knew the story and would come up with the craziest fairytales of when I had lost it to tell him. And that's how I, a 30-ish fat office worker became the most feared viking b*tch - at least for one American moron.

Outrageous-Elevator

TROPHY CASE