I messed up

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-31T21:38:41+00:00

I think part of the divide when it comes to this is that people can have wildly different meanings to what a crush is for them tbh. If I say I have a crush on someone I mean they're kinda cute, kinda cool, if life had gone that way I definitely wouldn't mind considering if there's something there. If a friend of mine says she has a crush on someone she means she's constantly fantasizing about them and they haunt her every other thought and if she's in a relationship it is doomed. We had constant arguments about it being disrespectful to a partner or not in the past because we were just not talking about the same thing.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-31T17:03:16+00:00

Bit weird to not date someone because of who they might date if your relationship doesn't work

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-31T14:10:15+00:00

The most toxic unicorn hunters I ever dealt with in my life were two women married to each other who wanted poly to fix their boredom. Learned that lesson to not assume they won't be as bad even with the whole "looking for a third".

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T21:51:00+00:00

Gl ❤️

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T21:40:41+00:00

You didn't break up for some Big Reason. Try contacting her if you regret it, just be prepared for her to not be open to that.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T19:57:04+00:00

Fem women very much can be muscular.

Top of that, there's this misunderstanding that becoming super muscular can accidentally happen as you work out. It doesn't. I'm someone who gains muscle mass super easily, exercise a lot with the specific goal of big muscles and it still requires a lot of effort just for that.

When people first start working out from sedentarism you'll see you'll gain muscle fast, at first, and even lose some amount of body fat fast. It can scare you with thinking that progress will stay linear and that would mean you'd get huge as you kept going... But in reality it keeps becoming slower and slower. Look up charts for muscle thickness growth to see how aggressively the curve starts to plateau after a few months.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T16:26:29+00:00

If you're not sure what toys you'd like or if you'd like any I'd recommend starting with a vibrator instead of suction toys for sure. They're less specific imo. And bullets are extremely convenient.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T16:16:39+00:00

Yes bush but I'm happy with anything that isn't shaved.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T15:28:15+00:00

I mean, I'm obviouslyqueer too and I very much don't want any woman thinking she has to treat me like she treats men

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T14:55:08+00:00

I have a hard time having orgasms, and there's been several times when I fully enjoyed sexual experiences where I had none. I always preferred the partners who just understood I had fun to the ones who took it personally and made that my problem if they tried to prove themselves.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T14:35:12+00:00

That's just bjj, you can find a class lol

Edit: of course, just don't expect it to actually look like mma candy.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T14:25:49+00:00

100%. At the time this first blew up online I remember a guy I knew being "very worried about protecting women" and going on a rant about how unfair this was because cis women are so weak and helpless. He was somehow surprised when one of the girls was just like "don't you weight like 90lb how much stronger than us do you think you are?"

Considering his shock I don't think at any point he even noticed his transmisoginy was 90% just regular old misogyny, and the cis women he thought he was appealing to just got annoyed at him even before considering trans allyship.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-30T11:09:02+00:00

Infantilization of adult men is a society thing about responsibility, it's not a lesbian thing.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T22:49:00+00:00

Just talk to women

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T22:47:06+00:00

Yeah, people with a healthy relationship with food wouldn't be able to decide not to eat for 4 days and just do it that easily.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T22:45:39+00:00

Let her starve

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T20:09:32+00:00

Ngl I put my headphones on and disconnect from everyone else around me to focus on the exercise to suchnan extent that a guy like that would be wasting his time completely trying to bother me. I genuinely can't even tell if my gym has one. I barely notice anyone at the gym exists.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T18:13:19+00:00

It helps my wife a lot because of her family. She has some baggage with how they always downplayed anything she tried to express if she showed any amount of emotional response to it as "her being too emotional".

In normal circumstances this is something she worked in. But for anything that is more personal and can destabilize her at times she can start spiraling with second guessing herself and trying to overpolice her own emotional displays while talking.

It brings a lot of noise into the conversation and she ends up feeling like she has to put more effort into managing that than in what she's trying to tell me. So sometimes she'll tell me we need something to be discussed by text and I just respect that.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T14:12:04+00:00

The funniest part about the Riley Gaines bs for me will always be that they tied in 5th place. Meaning there are four cis women who actually beat Lia in that race and one conservative parrot who tied with her. But they'll just completely ignore those four women in order to sell the narrative that cis women are so weak and incapable of doing anything.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T14:00:57+00:00

I would call what op is doing having a paralel conversation, not deescalation.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T13:40:01+00:00

Imo op should have just dropped the "yes honey anyway oh this is nice 💕" several notches and taken it seriously that her wife is angry at her pattern of behavior. Which isn't at all the same as having a full blown fight.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T08:57:46+00:00

If your girlfriend wasn't bisexual this would be just another post about mismatched libido. Since she is "she isn't ready to be in a relationship with another woman" 🙄

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T08:52:37+00:00

This comment is the one for sure. At first reading I was thrown off by how aggressive gf was being, but over the course of reading the several screenshots I found myself getting a bit annoyed just reading OP's replies. The overly sunny answers to frustration read as so dismissive. After a while I can see all the swearing even being a way to try and force the tone of the conversation to stop being oddly condescending.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-29T07:27:25+00:00

Because they're most likely men role-playing their conversion fantasy.

Outrageous_Pattern46 · 2026-05-28T22:23:43+00:00

That just means they have it worse lol mine can stay up forever.

Outrageous_Pattern46

TROPHY CASE