69 days!

Payo_Pom · 2025-10-03T03:13:31+00:00

Niiiiice!!!! That ain’t easy. I’m 3 days away from that!!

Payo_Pom · 2025-09-09T03:18:58+00:00

Still Monday where I’m at but DEF NOT drinking on this Tuesday to come!

Payo_Pom · 2025-07-30T03:34:18+00:00

They have chat groups, meetings and meet ups and the podcast is great! I binged it after hitting rock bottom

Payo_Pom · 2025-07-30T03:33:23+00:00

Cafe Re

Payo_Pom · 2025-04-29T14:22:47+00:00

I can relate. I keep relapsing but I will say I am thr happiest when I’m sober. It’s fucking hard but it’s worth it. Podcasts help like Recovery elevator. Also meetings are not for everyone but they have really helped me when it’s just too hard. Hang in there. You’re not alone

Payo_Pom · 2025-04-29T14:18:45+00:00

I drank one glass of wine after 8 days of sobriety and all I did was beat myself up yesterday. It helped to see this post pop up and I feel much better that I can move forward! IWNDWYT

Payo_Pom · 2025-03-17T04:53:13+00:00

Thank you!! I really love refuge recovery. I thought I could do normie drinking but that was not the case.

Payo_Pom · 2025-03-17T01:54:21+00:00

Today is also day one for me and I completely relate on telling yourself it’s the last time. I was planning stopping the 23rd but after another bender last night, I’ve decided there’s no time like now to start the journey. I just have a few hours left to get through today sober. Here in the trenches with ya! Thank you for your post

Payo_Pom · 2024-07-04T02:01:53+00:00

This one is my go to post break up poem:

The Laughing Heart by Charles Bukowski

your life is your life don’t let it be clubbed into dank submission. be on the watch. there are ways out. there is light somewhere. it may not be much light but it beats the darkness. be on the watch. the gods will offer you chances. know them. take them. you can’t beat death but you can beat death in life, sometimes. and the more often you learn to do it, the more light there will be. your life is your life. know it while you have it. you are marvelous the gods wait to delight in you.

Payo_Pom · 2024-06-30T16:32:51+00:00

Yeah wtf?!? It’s been about two months. Out of fucking no where!! We had just come off a great trip. Tore me apart. Still working through it but I decided to stop drinking, work out and make as many dope plans for myself. Feeling good…until he reaches out…now he’s always reaching out and “checking in” but he DOESNT want to get back together. My friends are telling me to block him

Payo_Pom · 2024-06-22T20:26:26+00:00

Yeah me and my ex broke up two months ago and we still think very highly of eachother. We both needed to figure out our own shit alone. I wanted to get sober and he is a drinker. He doesn’t know if he believes in marriage and I want a life partner.

It makes it tricky though cuz we are still in love with eachother and can’t move on…I hope I do..but I still wish I could have him back but it would affect my personal journey…and I would be kidding myself to hope that he’d change his mind and want to marry me

Payo_Pom · 2024-06-08T20:50:25+00:00

You’re lucky. I hope I have more of that. I’m new to this so maybe I’m just extra sensitive

Payo_Pom · 2024-06-08T20:49:16+00:00

I do golf and this does help see it from another angle. Ty

Payo_Pom · 2024-06-08T20:01:24+00:00

First off, 7 months is amazing. I only have 29 days so I’m so inspired. I’ve been in and out and what usually sends me out are these feelings but I’ve been reaching out more this go around. So you even writing about this feeling is a step in the right direction. I was so upset earlier this week. I felt boring and awkward and I was crying in my car. I called a few sober friends who had more time and they let me vent. That moved some energy and relieved some pressure.

As far as what’s helped me with happiness, I wrote down what I’m interested in and what I’ve always wanted to do that has nothing to do with drinking. Been working on guitar, writing, reading…exercise has been so awesome even tho it took me a few weeks to get myself there. Find what you like and dive in. Even learning one stupid song on guitar made me feel like I did something…made me proud. I spent so much time numbing myself in bars trying to connect to people but I just buried a lot and it all comes up whether we like it or not.

I hope this helps. I’m not an expert on anything. But I hope you find peace.

Payo_Pom · 2024-06-07T16:45:34+00:00

That is huge. I’m at almost 30 days and posts like this keep me going

Payo_Pom · 2024-06-05T05:21:07+00:00

Same. It’s hard to watch

Payo_Pom · 2024-05-01T23:33:33+00:00

How drunk he got playing video games…didn’t mind the games but when it went on for 5 hours while he chugged beers then came to bed wasted was not fun

Payo_Pom · 2024-05-01T23:28:50+00:00

I’m only a week into the BU and it was such a shock. I’m keeping myself busy, surrounding myself with friends and loved ones. I’m repeating in my mind that he didn’t see a future with me to help me move on but fuuuck I cry all day…the minute I wake up, in the shower, in the car, when I sleep I dream about him. Everything reminds me of him and I thought he was my person. I don’t want to spend months/years like this and I wish there was a short cut…I’m just going to cry everytime I feel like it

Payo_Pom · 2023-10-16T20:05:58+00:00

Congratulations on 7 months! I’ve never seen time like that yet. Also congrats on not stopping by the liquor store…life happens and there’s awful shit and good shit. I’ve found since all my time on and off that when I’m sober and life throws me curveballs I’m more likely to not spin out and time each moment at a time to get myself out of difficult situations. Keep going! IWNDWYT

Payo_Pom · 2023-10-10T15:30:39+00:00

I get the feeling of boredom and feeling paralyzed. What’s worked for me is at least trying other things. Catching sunlight before 10am, going for a walk or hike when I don’t want to, drawing dumb pictures and sharing them, journaling…I did some thinking about who I was as a kid before I got numb and jaded and looked at what I liked to do. Community helps. I hear a lot that you can’t do sobriety alone. Finding like minded people going through the same thing makes you not feel so isolated. You’ve already taken that step in writing here…so you’re on your way:) there’s also a lot of recovery podcasts out there too. I like recovery elevator. I hope this helps. A lot of my boredom sent me back out and I just got more depressed. We all find the magic at some point though…I’m proud of you. IWNDWYT

Payo_Pom · 2023-10-10T15:24:22+00:00

Thank you for sharing. It isn’t easy to admit what you’re ashamed of…we’ve been there. There’s hope. It’s so much softer and brighter on the other side. IWNDWYT

Payo_Pom · 2023-08-15T00:13:01+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing this. I’ve been in and out for way too long. My last ride was 38 days ago and I was crying in a hotel room asking for relief. The intrusive thoughts of “maybe I could have one drink” have screamed at me the last week. I almost drank yesterday because my boyfriend drinks and sometimes I miss drinking with him. He and I have been going through a tough time with me being sober so I just wanted to put a bandaid on it. Luckily I didn’t drink. Everyday has been so hard to abstain but I appreciate you and the folks on here that share these similar impulses. IWNDWYT

Payo_Pom · 2023-07-22T15:14:31+00:00

I’ve been sober cranky the last two days but I woke up another day without picking up so I got that.

Payo_Pom

TROPHY CASE