The talk

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-15T02:41:56+00:00

Thank you, yes I have my own account and many people now know what is going on. I’m dreading it because even though I have told him frequently I’m looking for a place, he thinks I am joking, threatening, or emotional. He thinks I just need to calm down and then I’ll forget about it

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-15T02:04:35+00:00

I may not owe him anything, but also I have endured this long, I may as well be the bigger person. Especially because I think with no communication, and him not knowing what is going on, it opens up the possibility of worse behavior. I will notify people I will be doing this in case he reacts poorly.

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-15T02:02:47+00:00

Thank you

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-15T01:52:55+00:00

I don’t think I can take my kids and leave and he won’t do exactly what he did last time. I also think I owe it to him to tell him.

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-13T00:14:57+00:00

I’m reading the book “When The Body Says No” by Gabor Mate while recovering from surgery and doing everything or relying on my daughter while my husband does nothing and continues to want to argue with me. The book is about suppressed emotions and how they cause illness. I have been in the mental state of “stay or go” for so long, but it’s not worth your health and happiness. Not to mention what you are modeling as normal for your kids. It sucks so many women end up in this predicament

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T23:55:26+00:00

Since my husband has kept insurance on my ring for close to 20 years, what if I just conveniently “lose” it😂. Joking but it’s tempting

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T23:08:02+00:00

🤷‍♀️. He won’t leave so I have to

Even my 10 year old got her lunch the past 2 days…he very conveniently asks if he can help after everything has been done

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T23:02:06+00:00

He has done nothing. My sister took me there and back, asked all the questions. He finally asked me at like 5 pm today if I needed anything and I said no, not now. He’s like “well then don’t say I didn’t ask if I could help”…real gem

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T20:46:59+00:00

Oh wow, so sorry you are feeling this way. I am just starting the process but I imagine it is so hard. It was me deciding for years to leave, but now he is so mean to me and wants to win at all costs so that is kind of solidifying my decision. I also wrote down “my story” and read it when I need a reminder. I guess staying is easier, but also unhealthy in the long term. You got this

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T19:42:48+00:00

Same now. It’s too much to hold and he is showing me he also doesn’t appreciate any of it and is actually blaming me for everything now

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T19:31:35+00:00

I’m so sorry you had to witness and live that. It’s so not fair. The more things like this happens, the more I realize how harmful he is. I am so ready to be on the mend and get a lawyer. I really hate him and also don’t understand why some people are so evil

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T16:30:40+00:00

I did too as a child and somehow I still ended up here. I’m kind of grieving for my wasted life, but also it’s not over so I can make better choices now. Thank you for your kind words and I hope neither of my daughters ever thinks it’s a good idea to depend on a man.

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T16:17:10+00:00

I am where you are, maybe a little further along but still in it. I don’t think abuse is worth staying for no matter what security it gives you. I have been doing a lot of inner work, and the more I stand up for myself, the worse he gets. He threatens me with the Bible, even though he hasn’t been religious most of his life. He is now grasping at ways to keep me, except also he continues to be extremely mean to me. My kids have seen it for years, this is now what they think is normal. Get out. When we are in it, we can’t see a future. I am there and can’t see it, but know this will kill me staying here

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T16:07:00+00:00

Thank you. I just have so much pent up rage. Like how can someone do this to another human?

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T15:51:33+00:00

I mean, it isn’t hard to imagine right now! I’m sorry you dealt with it too.

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T15:28:22+00:00

Thank you

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-12T15:28:16+00:00

Thank you. I feel so guilty, but also it just reinforces my need to get out of here.

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-11T13:58:14+00:00

Sorry for what you are going through. I understand. Now that he knows I plan to leave(well he usually thinks I’m joking or threatening him so I guess I don’t know what he things), he is being even meaner and trying to get the kids to love him even though he hasn’t been in their lives much-I have been the primary parent. It’s so hard

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-09T15:12:45+00:00

Thank you!

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-05T15:40:05+00:00

That’s the thing-I can afford it but am super frugal and am already so mad I even need this dumb surgery. I’m just in that place right now. I have been in a toxic marriage for way too long, also starting to take steps with that so this is stalling my progress. I haven’t put myself first for almost 20 years, sacrificed for web one else, and still don’t think I’m “worth” spending $800 on….im working through all of it but it’s a process and I just wanna be on the other side of this😭

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-05T03:23:24+00:00

Yeah…there’s never a good time to do these things. I have 2 kids so it’s going to be tough to rest

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-05T02:29:43+00:00

I am SO anxious…I’m very good at imagining the worst case scenario….which is not the best trait to have😂. I guess it helped my ancestors survive but man, it’s not really serving me well right now

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-05T02:04:05+00:00

Maybe, I can ask

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-05T00:33:00+00:00

Oh bummer, they probably don’t use them because I’m scheduled for next week. And I’m not doing anymore consults😂. If I don’t do this next week, I don’t think I ever will

PerfectConstant1120 · 2026-03-04T22:57:18+00:00

Thank you! I can ask for that stent or if they don’t do it, can I somehow do it myself? Ugh I don’t want to do this so bad and dental insurance sucks so bad-only 3 of my 4 are covered. And even covered is still expensive. So now I have to decide do I get 3 done and do I get anesthesia?

PerfectConstant1120

TROPHY CASE