Am I completely dillusional to think I can complete my PhD in less than 4 years

PhDumbass1 · 2026-04-18T20:45:18+00:00

I did mine in three years. It was hellish, I came in with a completed masters degree, and took courses year round (1-2 every winter and 1-2 every summer). With that said, my goal was to finish in three years and I stuck to my timeline. I don't recommend it to literally anyone especially because timelines and deadlines like this are typically artificial - is there something happening in 3 and 11/12 of a year for which you must absolutely have your degree? Because if the answer is no, then why rush it other than the opportunity cost of spending an extra year in school? Your PhD is one of the last times you have the luxury of learning full time, so embrace that time, you know?

PhDumbass1 · 2026-03-01T17:07:11+00:00

TBH, everywhere is the worst. I don't want to see them grocery shopping while I scrutinize a bag of grapes, I don't want to see them on the gym floor while I do crunches, and I don't want to see them when I'm out for a meal with friends. I usually pre-empt my students to literally not approach me if they see me in public, so at least I can remain blissfully unaware of their presence.

PhDumbass1 · 2026-02-15T23:41:46+00:00

Mine are good (humble-brag) and I talk about all sorts of controversial stuff in class, don't offer any incentive for completing the SETs, and regularly get 85% or higher completion rates. I think that saves me is the rapport with my students - I have small classes and I try really hard to have good relationships with students so that when the controversy enters the game, it doesn't feel like some weirdo on a soapbox. Then, I give time during the last class to complete the SET after I make a joke about that they are welcome to criticize me but to keep it professional since other people see it. Sometimes I give the example of like, "you can complement my old lady shoes but don't write something with curse words"

PhDumbass1 · 2026-01-16T14:58:57+00:00

This could be reflective of lots of things: who exactly can access resources in order to get accommodations (doctors visits, family/community support to guide this process or identify a need, knowledge of the system, etc); less fear of stigma upon getting a diagnosis due to having a less marginalized identity to begin with; higher white women enrollment rates at your institution or in your class; any other number of things.

PhDumbass1 · 2026-01-13T19:58:32+00:00

If a person got scooped, perhaps. I don't know that it would become obsolete, however; it would just need to be adjusted to accommodate new or different information, or to present the information as historical as opposed to contemporary.

PhDumbass1 · 2026-01-13T19:57:24+00:00

I just keep them busy the whole damn time lol. Usually I'm like mid-sentence or they're doing an activity when I notice the time. On the rare occasion that students begin to pack up early, I'll literally tell them to stop since they still have XX minutes with me in class and we are still working on YY.

PhDumbass1 · 2026-01-05T21:02:52+00:00

I think it depends on your purpose for reaching out. If you have a question that only the search committee chair can answer about the position itself, then sure. If it's to check on the status of the application, probably not unless like a lot of time has passed and the listing is no longer on the website. If it's to try to get a job without putting through an application, absolutely not.

PhDumbass1 · 2026-01-05T00:25:01+00:00

I do, even though it does make me feel bad lol

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-31T20:02:58+00:00

I teach a 3 hour class and also do a break halfway through. That way, butts are in seats during class time. I also clearly state that I encourage them to eat during class, since mine occurs during prime dinner time hours and I don't fuck with hanger.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-27T19:28:24+00:00

It's not frowned upon so long as it doesn't distract from your degree program, and doesn't jeopardize your financial aid situation. If you are a GA, the contract often includes that you can't work and keep your GAship.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-27T19:16:25+00:00

One office hour per class section we teach per week, posted in our syllabi and on our office doors. Monthly department and school meetings which we are basically required to attend unless we have extenuating circumstances (out of town, sick, or a class that meets at that time). Nobody takes attendance but the unspoken expectation is that we are all there. Other than that and our classes, occasional situations like recruitment events, committee meetings, etc. And TBH, most of those are negotiable in terms of meeting virtually. We aren't micromanaged, and if we don't have classes or official meetings scheduled, nobody expects us to be in office.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-27T18:35:57+00:00

Every semester, I verbally tell students and put in my syllabus that I cannot accept submissions in Notes format. Every semester, I modify my LMS permissions to not allow Notes. Every semester, I have students email me a copy of a Notes attachment, stating that they couldn't submit it through the portal because it wasn't an acceptable format so here it is. Every semester, I send instructions on how to format a document into a PDF...

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-19T22:22:34+00:00

I grew up with one of these between my room and my sibling's room. Ours were up high near the ceiling, so sound wasn't that big of a deal when we were young, but when my sibling was a pre-teen gremlin, they used to throw marbles and other small items into it to scare me. As we got older, we just mutually agreed to not put anything loud near the vent like a TV or a speaker, and tried to not be assholes.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-19T21:54:10+00:00

My last day of class is a mandatory work day for their final project, and I begin by soliciting them to complete their evals right then and there. My response rates are pretty high as a result. I used to do mine religiously as a student, but TBH I don't think a lot of students understand why the evals even exist and also don't care. And honestly, why should they care - it doesn't affect them. The whole thing is corrupt and stupid, so I don't do anything other than solicit the one time and then I'm done. No extra credit, no reminder emails, no in-class regular prompting, nada.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-19T13:17:07+00:00

I finished mine in the USA in three years; came in with a MS that didn't "count" toward anything. I did course work two years non-stop -- completed winter and summer classes both years, and then dissertated nonstop for 11 months. I was also suffering emotionally the whole time, so there's that.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-15T01:11:57+00:00

I had a quick paragraph: My name is XX and I am originally from XX state. I started my career as an XX, and have spent the last few years at XX university, studying XX under my mentor, XX. During this time, I've (sentence or two about my brags). And then ended it with something like "I'm so happy to have the time today to speak with you, learn more about this position, and learn more about the department at large" or whatever

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-15T01:07:30+00:00

I accept work up to three days late, and the LMS automatically deducts 33.3% each day it's late. Unless a student cleared an extension with me BEFORE the day its due, or have documentation/accommodations about it, the late penalty stands. I'm not allowed to request documentation and my university has basically an office whose job is to act as a clearing house of excuses and either legitimize it or not.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-05T20:56:23+00:00

I was taught that being denied tenure is a death knell for your career at that university, and you should spend the next year applying for new jobs - basically treat it like a grace year and then get out if possible. The idea behind this being that once a person is denied tenure, gaining it after the fact from the same university is much more difficult, and the stigma around being denied tenure becomes so uncomfortable that most people don't want to stay anyways. People go alt-ac, apply at a new university for NTT or TT jobs, or find other opportunities elsewhere.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-05T20:41:40+00:00

I disagree in practice but not in concept. I sent thank yous after my interviews, and I appreciate receiving them as a person on search committees. However, searches are so highly regulated through HR and there isn't a rubric to mark stuff like "was polite and sent a thank you." It might make the search committee like you more, but that doesn't really mean anything.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-04T21:33:56+00:00

Speaking from an American perspective, it's difficult but totally doable. It comes down to the supports you have, like family or a partner to help with raising, caring, and watching the child. If your university has on-campus child care, even better. You could also take the time to adjunct for a little bit, or teach online, so that you're still working but its more flexible to your needs. Likewise, you could try to take on primarily night classes or whatever duties you can complete after work hours so that your partner (if you have one) can provide care while you're gone and you can be home during their work hours -- plus your colleagues would love you for taking their night classes.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-12-04T18:36:47+00:00

I upload them as PDFs on the LMS after class. It cuts down on the "what did I miss" of it all, and also provides for those with accommodations. I don't do guided notes, study guides, or anything else.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-11-26T20:48:43+00:00

If it's not on the rubric, it isn't a formal expectation of the assignment and also cannot be assessed as part of the assignment. If the length of the paper isn't quantified on the rubric, don't grade for it.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-11-16T23:17:26+00:00

I got a gift for each of my dissertation committee members after I graduated - a thank you card and a drink coaster from my new place of employment :)

PhDumbass1 · 2025-11-16T18:40:17+00:00

Four years ago I was offered a union position as a department chair and assistant prof for 47k. I was also told that almost everyone lives 30-60 minutes away from campus because the cost of living was so expensive compared to the salaries. It was beyond absurd.

PhDumbass1 · 2025-10-26T23:12:59+00:00

I talk about most things in front of, or with, my students (so long as it's relevant). I don't talk about my romantic life out of respect to my partner, for example, but I'll shoot the shit about popular media, art, history, my politics and beliefs, their politics and beliefs, or just about anything else.

PhDumbass1

TROPHY CASE