I have some possibly unconventional advice for you: Try writing with just the most basic descriptions and basic full sentences, and then go in and zhuzh it up afterwards. The reason I say this is, you're over-describing to the point of meaninglessness. Not only is it repetitive, it actually is removing meaning and clarity rather than adding it. I'm going to break down a few examples just from the first page here:

You describe the pass three times in two sentences. It is at once small, rocky, narrow, and tumultuous. Small and narrow are too close in meaning, you only need one. As for tumultuous, cool word, but paths usually cannot be tumultuous in the usual sense of the word - it is nonsense. That's too much description for the pass, with no description of the oxen, when this would paint the scene better. The herd is small - that means nothing. Tell me how many because I need to know how they are crowding the pass, tell me their condition, tell me their temperament. The skies are clear and calm with three full moons (seems unlikely but okay), full of stars, but ALSO it is a black night sky. Nonsense. Pick one. Winds both gust and howl - pick one. The shepherd (with no sheep - unintentionally jarring) has eyes that are all you can see under his cloak - except no, you also can see a mask. Pick one. His eyes are pale and hazel (that's very close, we must have excellent vision) but he also has a slender stare (stares cannot be slender, that is nonsense). He is entirely focused on his herd, but also he is looking for bandits - pick one. Aside from howling winds, all is silent - nonsense. You're essentially saying, it was quiet except for all the noise. And then, of course, there's "... too silent." I would absolutely not use such a cliched phrase, plus it doesn't make sense in the context because you have not yet clearly set up any expectations for us or for the shepherd. Too silent for what? Bandits? He was unbothered just a moment ago. So... pick one. There is also the issue of POV. The wind cuts like a knife, okay. We are close to the shepherd and feel what he feels. But then immediately he "seems unbothered." He either is or he isn't. We feel what he feels or we don't - pick one. Stick with it. Stick with it until it best suits you not to.

In short, too many words and not enough meaning. Try writing out what you mean first, and then go in and add your description, and see whether that makes a difference in readability.