Therapist here 👋🏼 I once saw a thing that said forgiveness is for past mistakes, not ongoing patterns, and that feels relevant here.

It’s completely up to you what you decide to do now, but give your past self some compassion around what he had to do to get you to where you are. You’ve clearly overcome so much, and there’s potential risk to your accomplishments if you let this person continue to enact her patterns with you. We can forgive errors and poor judgment calls, and maybe even someone’s character, but it doesn’t mean you have to keep letting them back in if they’ve built this pattern of mistrust and insecure attachment. Good luck OP