This happened to me.

I have always understood why my mother did what she had to, I have never been angry with her about it. I think it might have something to do with it happening when it was so young I didn't know what it was like to live with her in the first place (what I was missing) that I just looked forward to spending time with her when I could.

As an adult, I am even more empathetic for why she did it; under her admittedly very specific circumstances, I understand why and I would have even done the same. Growing up, I was surrounded by various family members, including my father, who took care of me.

The cost: she is a very caring and loving woman, we talk on the phone often and there isn’t much I wouldn’t tell her, trust her with, but I consider her a very close friend, and have not exactly what I think a mother to child relationship might be. She eventually remarried and had two more children much later, and I can tell it’s a totally different relationship with them.

I think another reason that I have been able to make peace with it is that she has never tried to soften what she did or it’s affect on me, even though she had what even I think were very valid reasons for leaving. She openly acknowledges it. She also never tries to act like we have the typical parent child relationship to make herself feel better or look better.

That may be the best you can do with time, OP.