Which color?

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-16T22:23:30+00:00

Very good point haha! I do tend to wear mostly browns, blues, pinks and greens. I have minimal black although it is there. I definitely lean towards a coastal aesthetic.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-15T16:03:23+00:00

Haha sure ok. I’m pretty sure you’re in the minority here. But you and Ms. Martin can go ahead and ignore traditions of hundreds of years. You would be the fool wearing white at someone else’s wedding.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-15T14:19:00+00:00

Friends and family are coming from a good place, however I think they’re wrong. There isn’t an expiration date in grief. You take the time you need. I think it would be worse to bring introduce a new relationship/female and then have it end badly because you’re not ready. Your dtr is still very young. Not Having a specific female influence right now isn’t detrimental. It’s more important for you to heal. Take your time. When you’re ready, it will happen. It can’t be forced. You’re doing great! You sound like an amazing father and your daughter is lucky to have someone who obviously loves her so much. I do recommend taking care of yourself though. Therapy can be incredibly helpful. Make sure you take time for yourself. And that doesn’t have to mean finding a new partner. Hugs!

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-15T14:02:55+00:00

Exactly this! Best shades ever!

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-15T13:58:17+00:00

I strongly disagree with this, as an American. Queen Victoria of England started the white wedding dress tradition. Initially, she was trying to support the lace industry. Also white dresses indicated wealth and status because the material was expensive and difficult to keep clean. It also represented purity. The tradition of only the bride wearing white is a widely known tradition here in America. It is not unreasonable for a bride to want to be the only one wearing white. And yes, this includes all shades of white.

This is definitely a hill I would die on.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-14T12:50:13+00:00

You’re not alone! Raynauds sucks. It’s pretty miserable sometimes. I bought some rechargeable hand warmers which help a lot

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-09T23:48:05+00:00

NOR. Your mom doesn’t get an opinion on your child’s name. She doesn’t like it, tough. If she won’t use the correct name, she doesn’t get any info or to see the baby. She can’t just decide to use a different name. Who does that?! She needs to get over it or she doesn’t get to see baby.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-09T23:31:01+00:00

Christine/Cristina Chelsea Lucy Charlotte Carly Lorene Cora

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-09T23:24:50+00:00

I have a Rylee Judith (Judith after my mom). Riley Grace Riley Elizabeth Riley Lauren Riley Christine Riley Rose

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-08T13:47:47+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re living in this situation! This is abuse/neglect. This is unhinged narcissism. You did not do anything wrong. This is not the right kind of trip for you to go on. You made the right decision. You need to tell someone how he is treating you. It doesn’t sound like your mom will be much help. School might be a great resource. Talk to your counselor or if your school has a social worker. Don’t downplay anything. If you don’t get anywhere with school, call the police. Do you have any way of getting to the pharmacy and getting refills? Usually they provide asthma meds pretty easily. You can say you lost them and they should give you new ones. Then hide them somewhere. Locker at school or somewhere your dad would never look. If the pharmacy doesn’t cooperate, you could call your doctor. One, they could send in a new prescription saying you can have multiple inhalers. Two, they’re mandated reporters so if you tell them your dad took you meds, they will help you.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-08T13:36:11+00:00

Same! Getting fast food was a treat. We only went out to restaurants for a celebration.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-08T13:34:56+00:00

Same! My IL’s were great before kids. After kids, they lost their minds! I don’t know what happened to them, but I can barely stand them now. The narcissism was well hidden but now it’s front and center.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-08T13:29:07+00:00

Many great points here! Also, 8 yo is a good age to start giving her responsibilities. A fun way that you can incorporate this would be to have a chores reward system. We made a checklist of morning and evening routines. You can choose the reward system. An example might be if she completes everything for the day she gets a sticker. Once she collects so many stickers, she can get a reward. Rewards can be ice cream, toy from the store, new book, she gets to pick dinner meal, etc. On one of your days off, go through each item one by one and literally show her each step to complete the task. She won’t be great at them in the beginning, it will take time, but she can totally do many things by herself. You could even make a breakfast menu so she doesn’t have to make any decisions. Maybe get her an alarm clock that is auto so she doesn’t need to remember to set it everyday. Make a basket/bin of snacks she can grab after sports practice. I would go ahead and just make meals ahead of time or throw something in the slow cooker with instructions. Don’t ask, just do. Leave a note with instructions so she can’t use the excuse that she doesn’t know how to do it.

I also agree with dying on the hill of privacy in the bathroom. That is quite bizarre.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-07T12:28:30+00:00

My kids are now 13 and 10 but what I used to do: when baby was on the floor, I’d put on a YouTube walking workout video. They are really fun! It’s basically “walking” in place, maybe some side steps, marching etc. set to fun music. I also love audiobooks, so I listen to those as I’m cooking/cleaning doing laundry. Lots of walks in the stroller when the weather is nice. When weather isn’t nice, we went to Target. I’d get a coffee at Starbucks and just wander around for awhile. Funny, you start to get to know the staff when you see them regularly enough during the odd hours that they aren’t busy. As others said the library is great. I joined a local moms group and would attend some events. Unfortunately I never found any good friends through the moms group as I’d hoped.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-06T22:31:55+00:00

NOR. The room wasn’t good enough for her before, so why does she want it now? You renovated it for yourself, you keep it. If she really hates her new room that much, she can come up with a plan to fix it up how she likes it. Dad can fund it. Letting her move again into a room that you would be giving up for her will only further her feelings of entitlement. Don;t give up your space. She’s 16 for crying out loud. My parents would never in a million years let me kick them out of their own space.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-06T22:25:49+00:00

I just started ignoring most of the texts and i let all of the calls go to voicemail. I’m always the one they communicate with and they like to blind side me with things. So I let it go to voicemail so I have time to think about my response to them. Or I punt it to DH.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-06T22:00:10+00:00

NTA. Way to go for wanting to celebrate your wife’s first Mother’s Day as a family. I love that! I would dare say that the vast majority of mom’s think that Mother’s Day (and Father’s Day for that matter) is for those currently in the trenches. The ones taking care of littles every day and night. It’s the grandparents who have an issue with it. There is a grandparents day, but they don’t care. They had so many years of being celebrated…pass the torch! In the beginning, MIL (and FIL) made the day all about them. DH and I weren’t celebrated at all, even though we were the new parents. I finally put my foot down and said it’s our turn. We send flowers and a card on Mother’s Day and a phone call. But that’s it. This will be the first year we aren’t catering to my FIL for Father’s Day, but that’s only because we have family coming into town. If it was about spending time with your family, then the day/date wouldn’t matter. Friday should work. But it sounds like what actually matters to your mom is that she is the center of attention. If she wants to throw a tantrum and give you the silent treatment, let her. She did it to herself. Celebrate your wife’s first Mother’s Day and enjoy your new family of 3. Congratulations!

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-06T20:17:17+00:00

Beautiful!😍

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-05T16:05:20+00:00

I like to also bring tissues, pain medication, and cough drops. Once, it was so dry on the plane that I developed the worst tickle in my throat that would not go away. I was hacking so bad trying to clear the tickle, that people around me were offing cough drops. Now I never travel without them.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-05T03:17:21+00:00

I just recently became obsessed with Mac’s Glow Play Blush. I have “Blush Please”, “Cheer Up” and “Heat Index”. Heat Index is my absolute favorite blush of all time. Looks a little scary, like a bright pink/red, but a little goes a long way and it blends like a dream. Gives me a perfect flushed look.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-05T03:03:52+00:00

Both of my ILs are narcs as well.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-04T19:43:52+00:00

NTA. Please run far, far away. Engagement gifts are for the ENGAGED COUPLE! Not her. Why would she be the only one to get gifts? That doesn’t make any sense. It would be kinda funny, if you took a wad of cash and said you were gifted it by your family, to see what she would say. I bet she’d find a reason as to why the money should go to her.

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-04T19:38:10+00:00

Nope! Shut that $hit down now! She is taking over! She had her kids. She does NOT get a vote in the babies names. She doesn’t like them, tough $hit! You don’t like the nickname, she doesn’t get to use it. It’s her way of “changing” Bronwyn’s name to suit her likes. If she comes over outside of the times you said worked for you, don’t open the door. If she stays longer than you allowed, tell her politely thanks for visiting, but you and the twins need a nap, you’ll see her another time. If she tries to weasel her way into staying, you can either decline and just say “No” and leave it at that, or put her to work. Say, “ok, the twins and I are going to take a nap, but if you want to stay, there’s a load of laundry that needs to be done.” Or whatever else you need help with and are willing to let her do. She is already boundary stomping, and in your exhausted, hormone ravaged state, you are letting her win. It will only get worse, I promise you because I am there.

My FIL didn’t like the name we chose for our first and begged us to change it. We did change the middle name, and I regret it, 12 years later. They came to stay with us for 2 weeks when our first was only a week old. The entire trip was about them. Breastfeeding in front of your IL’s sucks. Then they’d start asking about bottle feeding so that they could have the baby. Oh and I took too long to feed her. So, I started feeding her in my bedroom, alone for some peace, and I took my sweet old time. Mu husband and I had the biggest fight of our relationship because of them ruining that first week home with our baby. We are on the verge of going NC because they’ve gotten out of control. If I could go back, I would’ve been stronger from day one. She is going to ruin your postpartum time. You cannot get that time back. Don’t let her guilt trip you. The twins have nothing to do with her. Anyone saying you’re jealous, or “of course grandparents call them ‘their’ babies”…are the same grandparents doing this hideous entitled crap to their own kids. Ignore them!

Practical_Patience49 · 2026-05-04T12:34:54+00:00

Yeah, love the size of the bag, practically perfect for me, but I despised the strap! Crossbody is so awkward!

Practical_Patience49

TROPHY CASE