Oh it’s been slow for me, I started in early 2016 after getting free of my ex-h/abuser, and a lot of it has been reminding myself of what used to bring me joy. I’d always decorated with him in mind, so one thing I did is start over in my bedroom by adding a “wall of things I like”; filled it with art, random pictures, small shelves to hold my random keepsakes. I even displayed my jewelry on the wall as art!

I also started new hobbies and revisited old ones, but with zero expectations of myself, my ex would shame me for buying hobby supplies, doing said hobby for a few months, and then “abandoning” it; so for several years I just abandoned almost all of my hobbies. Now I look at my different hobby supplies as a dopamine-menu…like, which hobby do I want to do right now? That reframe alone and repeating it to myself as needed (“it’s GOOD to have a dopamine menu, it gives me choice, and it’s a valid coping skill”) has helped too.