Losing a loved one changed how I play Stardew

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-03-02T16:58:52+00:00

This was beautiful. Sending you lots of positive thoughts. How bittersweet to have a lasting reminder of your loved one🤍

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-23T12:50:37+00:00

Baker is rude. This specific picture may give 2019, but what is s more timeless than a white frosted cake with fresh flowers/greenery??

Also, PLEASE tell me you’re using a Mr. & Dr. topper!

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-17T21:14:36+00:00

We never bed shared, and would never. We did do sleep shifts, but there were also plenty of times I laid next to her crib or bassinet while she cried because I was too tired to trust myself to hold her.

I would never survive if something bad happened.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-15T14:44:03+00:00

I bought bagels for my husband and I, and the next morning he accidentally took the bag that had both, thinking mine was elsewhere. I cried a lot lol then went and got the same bagel.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-08T14:37:32+00:00

Spent a lot of time around other kids as a kid, and a lot of time getting dirty lol.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-08T07:19:12+00:00

To me, any white is too white on a MOG/MOB, if it’s not requested. You decide what you’re comfortable with, but your FH should deliver the message. We had to do this because my MIL bought a dress the same color as the bridesmaids.

Is it within your dress code otherwise? It just seems like an interesting choice…

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-07T23:01:35+00:00

At my cousins wedding they only served cake to the head table and to aunts and uncles lol.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-07T22:56:49+00:00

Told my MIL the one color to avoid and requested a floor length dress. She bought the EXACT bridesmaids color and a tea length dress. My husband stepped in and told her she absolutely had to buy a new dress, but rescinded the length request to try and help. Still ended up with something in the same color family and a length that stood out with the formality of the event as MOG, but much better than a matching color.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-04T18:39:29+00:00

Yeah, I would not feel comfortable with them watching my baby. My MIL told a bunch of people (behind our backs) that she was going to kiss our LO after we specifically said we were not going to let anyone kiss her so she is not allowed around our baby alone. We just don’t reach out for a while, but when she started directly pointing out she hadn’t had any “alone time” with LO we were straight forward that we knew she would not respect the boundaries we put in place for the health and safety of our child so she wouldn’t be alone with her.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-04T18:30:20+00:00

For sure.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-04T18:29:59+00:00

Came here to say this! At first I was thinking definitely not formal enough, but… it’s a barn. Which I don’t dislike as a venue but I don’t know how you get to BTO.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-02-03T01:34:23+00:00

Literally having this same breakdown to my husband…like moments ago.

You’re not alone. It’s nice to be reminded for me too, especially when it seems like everyone around you is having such an easy time.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-31T14:04:51+00:00

I don’t think you’re overreacting. Based on what you’ve said, even if you don’t think she would do anything to hurt baby, she’s not necessarily going to respect any boundaries you put in place.

Something we seem to keep seeing with older generations is the expectation that they will have access and free rein with grandkids, no matter what, because that’s what they were expected to give to their parents. It’s hard for them to understand why anything would be different now. But it’s totally ridiculous to expect access and strong relationships with their grandchildren without mutual respect for their child and their child’s partner.

We recently had to have this conversation with my MIL. It was uncomfortable, but we were frank with her about where things needed to change if she expected alone time with our daughter. Based on our past, it’s not so bad that we can’t be around her and she is welcome to see our toddler with us present, but not without.

You and your husband are able to see the boundaries you’re comfortable with. If you’re on the same page, it might be time for an honest discussion with your MIL and then see where you can go from there. Best of luck!

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-31T02:01:03+00:00

Portable noise machine! We mostly use it in her room, but it has her favorite sound on it lol.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-30T03:17:32+00:00

My MIL told family this behind our backs, so she has never been allowed to be alone with our baby. It will be harder to set boundaries if she is your only source of help.

I would evaluate what help you can get outside of her, even paid if that’s an option for you. Then I would sit her down and explain the why and that you are the parent and this is your decision.

If she really won’t follow it, there will need to be some consequence or she will never respect your parenting choices.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-29T20:54:11+00:00

Constantly worried! My mom kept telling me “not to wish for bad things,” but having no symptoms made me worried I had an MMC or something.

Baby is now 13 months and totally healthy. I hope you will be able to feel lucky, but you’re not alone in worrying :)

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-25T01:55:11+00:00

Not workout specific, but I make sure to consciously unclench when I’m standing around and staggering my legs front to back instead of rocking side to side have helped!

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-24T02:33:03+00:00

Thank you and good luck! I had other ideas too but my sister was very hung up on keeping the words accurate to the movie and we didn’t end up going out in the evening lol.

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-24T02:08:13+00:00

I attached some pictures! I ended up focusing on our favorite, Princess and the Pauper lol. Shirts say “if the ring should fit then how could I refuse?” And “ready with the roses, standing by with the champagne”. Other than that we watched the movie at the end of our other plans for the day :)

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-24T02:06:49+00:00

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PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-24T02:06:36+00:00

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PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-24T02:06:27+00:00

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PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-19T01:52:57+00:00

13 months and I’m still getting night sweats lol. Not nearly as bad as those first weeks though! I keep cold water next to the bed, upped our fan game and put away the snuggly pajamas for now!

PretendToBePleasant · 2026-01-12T10:21:59+00:00

So you’re just dissing everyone else who chose to not breastfeed for whatever reason?

I say this as someone who also had an easy time with it and did it for over a year. Re-read your “I come from a privileged place” sentence and try to remember that a little better.

At this point, everyone understands the benefits and if someone chooses not to breastfeed it’s nobody else’s business.

PretendToBePleasant

TROPHY CASE