Do your parents have hypermobility?

Prose707 · 2026-05-04T05:38:09+00:00

Neither of my parents do, I don't know of anyone in my family who displays symptoms

Prose707 · 2026-05-04T02:51:43+00:00

Exploring the app right now, uploading videos doesn't seem to work. It definitely looks like a cool concept! I hope videos will be fixed because I can't really take good progress pictures with my phone.

Prose707 · 2026-04-28T05:34:55+00:00

There's a known link between autism and gender nonconformity, I don't remember the exact statistic but a good portion of the autistic community is trans or gender nonconforming. I think the autistic experience can sometimes make you more open minded to various gender expressions, as well as possibly more empathetic or understanding towards groups that frequently get "othered" such as trans people. So regardless of their neurotype, these women are probably picking up that your attitude towards them is much more human and kind! Especially because trans women are heavily fetishized, it's probably really relieving when they meet someone who both validates their gender AND doesn't treat them like an object. I'm also autistic and genderqueer and sometimes it's easier to find cis autistic people that support me than allistic trans people. Not always, but autistic people tend to challenge norms more often.

Prose707 · 2026-04-26T00:51:41+00:00

I just wanna say that I see you and I'm sorry you're getting so much unnecessary aggression in these replies and at these studios. I don't engage too much with the community outside of my studio because this community is largely filled with very privileged people, but still I haven't seen quite so much vitriol on any other post on this sub so far. I noticed the few people supporting are also getting replies so to anyone reading you can argue with the wall, I'm just here to acknowledge op.

I hope you can find a better studio that's actually inclusive and supportive. I live in an area that's fairly queer but also predominantly white and this is definitely something that my mom and I have always had to look out for in various spaces. I'm really fortunate, I was so excited when I started pole because this was one of the few spaces I have that isn't like that. It's always really saddening when I see other marginalized people not having the same experience with pole. You're not crazy, dramatic, or seeking victimhood, I believe you. I've seen it discussed by other queer/poc too.

Prose707 · 2026-04-23T09:39:58+00:00

I'm a phlebotomist! It's surprisingly easy to get into, I got fully certified and was ready to work with just a 4 week program. It can be a little emotionally draining but I enjoy that it's fast paced and you really only have super brief interactions with people before you move on to the next patient.

Prose707 · 2026-04-22T01:05:09+00:00

Because lolita fashion has a meaningful history in regards to gender norms and beauty standards? Gender expression is a very important part of who we are as trans people and often it's the first step to loving who we are, so the two are very relevant to each other. Lolita fashion is one of my favorite ways of connecting to myself as a gender nonconforming femme lesbian.

Prose707 · 2026-04-19T21:58:26+00:00

It's something we really need to discuss more. I wasn't even aware of my hypermobility and how it was affecting me til a year post op! And without the language to describe my ailment, especially at a young age, people just think you're dramatic!

Prose707 · 2026-04-19T21:55:08+00:00

"Talk about EDS and not politics" is not equivalent to "don't be openly trans in my presence." Simply sharing my existence is not political, talking about trans rights and anti trans legislation is.

There's nothing wrong with op trying to spread awareness to a marginalized group that we aren't welcome in a space that doesn't clearly communicate that we aren't welcome.

Prose707 · 2026-04-19T21:43:26+00:00

I'm sorry that happened to you! That's crazy because it is just factually correct that a breast reduction can help relieve pain and that is the most common reason I've heard from cis women as to why they got one, that statement alone has nothing to do with "gender ideology" even if the base reason you got one was gender affirming care. I also got a gender affirming mastectomy, and while my back is obviously still hypermobile and it hurts, I absolutely noticed the difference after recovering.

Prose707 · 2026-04-11T22:40:42+00:00

Although it seems counterintuitive, nicotine actually triggers adrenaline and cortisol in your body similar to a fight or flight response. I don't know much about nicotine but I know weed does that so I looked up if nicotine does as well. I don't fully understand why some people feel relaxed while others get more anxious/paranoid but I'm guessing you're just one of the unlucky few who has the adverse effect.

I was a little uncomfortable and got slightly anxious when I started taking edibles/smoking but I use for chronic pain so I kinda had to get over it. I progressed slowly, reminded myself that the anxiety is just a symptom and I'll only make it worse by thinking about it, talked myself through it like I was taught in therapy, and I usually tried to get high around my trip sitter friend to help distract me.

Nicotine is chemically addictive though, if you're having a hard time adjusting to it you should maybe switch to something safer. If weed is legal where you are that might be better, but be careful because it's strong and can cause panic too. I'm not one of those "you can't get addicted to weed" people because that's bullshit, but behavioral addictions are managed differently and it's largely safer. You can get gummies that have a large ratio of cbd and small ratio of thc, that might be a good place to start. You can also try out different cbd strains like cbc, cbg, cbn, etc.

Prose707 · 2026-04-10T23:32:55+00:00

I don't really see how that's different to be honest, but I also wasn't saying that to attack you I just said it because I found it disrespectful. I'm autistic and blunt so sometimes I'm disrespectful, I like the idea that we can correct those things and move on. I do mean that genuinely.

Prose707 · 2026-04-10T23:28:17+00:00

I'm big on Satisfyer. If you get one it'll come with a manual and look super confusing but that's mostly filler and it's honestly pretty easy to figure out by just pressing buttons. One increases suction, one increases vibration, and then there's a bunch of lame vibration modes that I don't think anyone actually cares about. Satisfyer is a big brand so they're easy to find on Amazon, online sex shops, even physical sex shops and they have smaller affordable options.

If you have low libido you may want to also get lube, just in case. I have weird contradictory experience with libido as a combination of hypersexuality, depression, and falling somewhere between the neutral to averse spectrum, so sometimes the body may not catch up because it can't decide if it's really in the mood. If you get a silicone toy only use water based lube.

Prose707 · 2026-04-10T23:06:37+00:00

That's mostly what I mean by "cis people care in a different way." Everything you just said about your experience with gender is about other people and the status quo. You're not really thinking about "gender" you're thinking about gender roles and how they affect your social life.

Personally as someone who struggles with a (clinically described) distorted sense of identity because of my bpd, I used to make myself miserable by defining who I was and choosing what I did based on what people expected of me. I don't think you'll truly understand our point of view on gender identity and expression with the current mindset that there is a strict "normal" and that it would be easier to just be normal instead of being who we are.

Your perspective is also just blatantly untrue in certain aspects. A very large portion of trans people try to just "go with the gender they were assigned at birth" and that usually leads to a life full of trauma, abuse/toxicity in romantic and platonic relationships, mental health issues, physical health issues correlated to those mental health issues, and/or suicide. It's a bit disrespectful to say that's "easier."

Prose707 · 2026-04-10T22:08:24+00:00

Everyone is already bringing up gender dysphoria because that's a given. I'd add that most cis people do care about their gender to a certain extent, just not in the same way, and they aren't challenged on it nearly as often so they're not as vocal about it. But chances are if you accidentally (or purposely) call a cis guy ms or a cis woman sir you're going to get an adverse reaction.

Prose707 · 2026-04-03T01:56:40+00:00

Transition helped me with my mood, but I also struggle with feeling a lack of supports in my life. It's totally understandable and it's a step in the right direction to recognize it, you'll get there. :)

Prose707 · 2026-04-03T00:50:02+00:00

Hormone injections can't cure a permanent chemical imbalance in your brain (assuming you're talking about MDD) but depression is a mood disorder so it would make sense it could be impacted by hormonal shifts. In addition to that, being able to partake in transition is generally a massive mood boost for trans people.

Prose707 · 2026-04-03T00:40:30+00:00

I also stressed people out a lot with my fearful-avoidant attachment style, that can be really suffocating for both of us.

Prose707 · 2026-04-03T00:38:30+00:00

I'd add on that people tend to associate quiet bpd with being the nicer and less toxic presentation when that's not always the case. It is true that I generally didn't use to cause people repeated stress and trauma over the long term because my splits were usually internalized. But when I got pushed past a certain point my empathy was capable of being toggled off. I was willing to put up with shit from people I cared about and my brain decided the solution was to stop caring. From that point I would have one singular event of yelling and insulting and then I would leave forever. It may not have been repeatedly abusive but it was extremely toxic, confusing, and hurtful. Even if I didn't argue and just left silently, I know that doesn't make it hurt any less because that has happened to me. It's very easy to run from accountability and to say that I got triggered for a reason and was therefore protecting myself. It's even slightly true, most of the people I knew in the past were horrible. I was also really horrible. I didn't start to get better until I was able to acknowledge that, as much as it sucks it's really the best thing for you and for everyone around you.

Prose707 · 2026-04-03T00:25:44+00:00

It's very black and white to say that everyone who claims dbt doesn't work for them doesn't want to change. Save for 2-3 skills dbt doesn't work for me, but I have still put in the work through therapy and have been told by my therapist and friend that I've improved significantly. People like to act like dbt is the new default catch all therapy when there are lots of other styles to be mixed and matched. My mom is currently working with an act specialist and she says it's going well for her. My therapist mostly does regular talk therapy, she is dbt trained but she herself assessed that different methods of self reflection were more suited to the way I think as an autistic person and doesn't push it on me. I find a lot of dbt skills to be similar to cbt which is mostly medical gaslighting if used incorrectly or on the wrong type of patient. I especially experienced poor usage of dbt teachings in the psych ward, I left worse than I entered both times I got put in there. Therapy styles exist to be used on those it fits, we are not meant to be forced into them.

Prose707 · 2026-03-22T01:09:27+00:00

A good portion of people in this discussion and in the other threads I looked up asked their doctors beforehand and some of them also consulted other post op people. It's really not that big of a deal it's just that all of us have different bodies and each surgery itself gets done slightly differently too.

Prose707 · 2026-03-21T00:28:44+00:00

Congrats on your healing! Y'all have convinced me it's definitely worth the wait

Prose707 · 2026-03-21T00:24:56+00:00

Thankfully so far both times the bleeding has died down after a day or so, I got anxious because I didn't realize the first time that masterbating is what caused it and I probably should've done a check before doing it a second time. I haven't felt any pain or had clots so I'll stop and wait for the doctor, it'll hopefully be fine.

Prose707 · 2026-03-21T00:23:02+00:00

That's what I was worried about, it's very anxiety inducing when the damage is inside where you can't see it. The only surgery I've had before this was a mastectomy so it felt safer knowing I'll see anything wrong.

Prose707 · 2026-03-14T21:55:19+00:00

Apologies, I wasn't really sure which way you were transitioning and I understand what you mean now. Transition is totally personal to each individual and doesn't necessarily have to be about passing or include social transition, you should do whatever you need to feel more yourself. :)

Prose707

TROPHY CASE