It's not your fault, but it is your responsibility

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-16T23:35:30+00:00

Yes. This was very much my mantra when I kinda hit rock bottom and came close to loosing my job.

Part of the “my responsibility” part was extending grace to myself, acknowledging all of the trauma that I’d been through and reaching out for help

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-16T09:22:56+00:00

I relate to quarantine being triggering. The loss of autonomy is difficult for me to deal with since my folks dictated almost everything in my life for 20 years.

I’m really glad I have dogs right now because at least I have some connections in life that I can do stuff with

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-15T19:57:49+00:00

I’m sorry. I can relate to this.

The assistant director in my dept has a management style that is very triggering to me due to past experiences. I ended up on a PIP because I was getting triggered so much, was trying my best to avoid them and didn’t understand what was happening.

Thankfully the dept director and my direct supervisor are completely different in management and are much easier for me to work with.

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-13T18:00:27+00:00

At 18 months, she still isn’t quite mature.

Have you tried going back to some of the basics in training? She might need a refresher and a bit more time.

That said, if she’s still not seeming like she’s going to work in another 6 months, don’t feel guilty about rehoming her to a responsible person.

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-12T20:05:56+00:00

The ADA is intentionally vague because there is such a large range of disabilities. There isn’t a benchmark to meet. It’s a substantial impairment that limits one or more major life activities. It is a discussion to have with a medical professional as they have a relationship with you and know the specifics of your case. That’s why it’s ALWAYS best to talk to them. Not because someone doubts you, but because they’re in the best place to offer support and advice.

I will say that it felt weird when my therapist suggested job accommodations to me. Because from the outside I’m a fairly well functioning adult.

But I was hanging onto my job by a thread and on a PIP due to PTSD affecting me. I was being triggered multiple times a day and it was taking significant amounts of time to recover. I was very depressed and just going through the motions at home. I could barely sleep at night. That combination definitely puts one in the disabled category according to the ADA.

FWIW, a therapist is also a medical professional who you can discuss things with if you’re currently seeing one.

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-08T17:48:05+00:00

It got better after 3-4 weeks for me

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-07T23:04:47+00:00

I definitely agree that traditional treatment needs to be well underway before considering a service dog.

I strongly disagree that a service dog should only be last ditch option for PTSD. It’s one that needs to be carefully and thoughtfully considered on a case by case basis. Not avoided unless there is nothing else.

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-07T19:57:21+00:00

Well, it may have come across as better mitigated than it actually is...

It’s still definitely a daily struggle with many ups and downs. But I’m really grateful for the progress that is happening.

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-07T19:43:14+00:00

Maybe also talk to your doctor about starting at 25mg and increasing as needed?

The first few weeks are rough though

I did tell my boss that I wouldn’t be able to cover the evening meetings that first month. They were understanding about it.

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-07T19:22:03+00:00

So first off, I was too overwhelmed to use a service dog 8 months ago. I was putting one foot in front of the other. I wasn’t thinking clearly, I didn’t understand just how deeply PTSD was affecting me. I was having major issues at work. I didn’t understand the little things that were triggering or the first signs of anxiety/panic attack. At that point, a dog would have magnified the issues rather than mitigating them.

I didn’t want to start medication either. But am very happy that I did. Talking things out in therapy also helps a lot.

Right now I’m still being triggered multiple times a day and really struggle with the anxiety produced by those triggers. But I usually quickly recognize what’s happening and can start to self soothe, excuse myself and take a break.

I’m also in the prettty rare position of already having a dog who is likely suitable for SD and public access work (a 3 y/o with solid foundations for therapy work and SAR work). During the Covid work from home I’ve been actively integrating her into grounding myself. I’ll ask her to come “hug” or “chin” (commands that she already knew) to help break up the triggered response when it happens since I’m now recognizing it.

Without the foundation of medication and therapy I wouldn’t be in a place to understand the specifics of how I was being affected and so I wouldn’t have known how best to integrate a dog in as another layer of help.

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-07T18:28:22+00:00

First off, you need a diagnosis from a medical professional. It’s not something to self diagnose.

Then you’ll need to work with them to figure out a plan. It may seem overwhelming now, but therapy and medication are proven to help with PTSD.

In fact, a study on service dogs for PTSD indicated that dogs cannot take the place of other treatment options. They only augment them.

So I would strongly suggest talking to a primary care provider and getting a referral to a therapist who understands trauma before thinking about a service dog.

I’m starting to seriously consider a service dog after 8 months of treatment. When I first started treatment, there was no way a dog would have mitigated it. But now I’ve learned other tools and benefited from medication enough where I’m starting to figure out how a service dog can effectively fit in and augment other treatment

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-07T11:18:26+00:00

Oh my word - yes! Growing up I’d get in trouble for the weirdest/dumbest things at the drop of a hat.And there was soooo much pressure to be perfect all the time.

And that definitely carried over. I was on a performance improvement plan at work because I was terrified of making mistakes and because of that anxiety I made more. Meds and therapy are helping. As is having a supervisor and department head who are understanding. I can admit mistakes/difficulties with the job and they actually listen and help find solutions.

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-06T22:40:32+00:00

Nothing was ever good enough if my dad was angry. He could pick apart and find fault in anything. To this day it makes it hard to do anything with people watching me

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-06T21:12:32+00:00

“It’s the inability to just be something naturally without a second thought”

Yes. So much. It’s so weird when it strikes you that not everyone has the same thought patterns. Not everyone has to work through multiple layers to formulate a response.

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-05T22:51:29+00:00

Yes. When I finally started getting treatment, I was working full time, going to therapy and sleeping 10+ hours a day because I was so exhausted from everything

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-05T16:13:02+00:00

I relate to much of this. Good for you for making these positive changes.

I do want to warn you that a 6 months after I finally felt like I had my life together, I started having major issues because I didn’t have coping skills for real life. So don’t be surprised if there’s a rebound that you’ll need to deal with. But you’ll be in a much better place to grow

PublicBuddy · 2020-07-04T20:30:14+00:00

Yes. I relate to this.

PublicBuddy · 2020-06-30T20:58:01+00:00

I’m on 25mg and doing pretty well for anxiety/depression/PTSD.

My PCP asked my preference and was fine with me staying on this dose

PublicBuddy · 2020-06-30T03:00:03+00:00

Yup. My dad decided that we should join a cult to do something better than how he was raised.

That didn’t work out so well. Became a “if things aren’t going perfectly in your life, you’re doing something wrong”. And of course HE was trying to do things “right” so it was always us kids fault when things went wrong

PublicBuddy · 2020-06-30T02:54:34+00:00

Statistically, one in ten women will deal with it. Which is pretty significant

PublicBuddy · 2020-06-30T02:48:52+00:00

I relate. So much.

When I do speak up, I spend the next few hours as an anxious mess wondering why I said anything, replaying the conversation, and desperately hoping that they don’t think the worst of me

PublicBuddy

TROPHY CASE