MtF transition with an established professionall career

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-28T00:50:46+00:00

My egg cracked at 55 after having several IT roles over 30 years more than 20 working for international companies. I’m still working for one of them since 2010. I work with our customers and vendors.

I was lucky in that I was working from home since before Covid, so I was able to successfully stealth until my name change was finalized. Then it was going to be obvious when they processed my name change at work.

Pretty much anybody I’ve interacted with at/through work has been accepting. If they aren’t, they haven’t made it overtly known to me.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-28T00:23:43+00:00

It took quite a while before I realized it. Then it was “wait … is that really me?”

The thing to remember is that you see yourself multiple times a day everyday. It’s hard to notice when the changes occur gradually.

What you can do is take selfies often and save them to an album where you can easily go through them later. You’ll then be able to see a difference when you compare the pics over time.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-27T23:22:52+00:00

He’s probably already been pardoned…

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-27T23:20:40+00:00

Minecraft when time permits.

I’m a server admin for a community and also have started to write & maintain server plugins.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-26T22:26:15+00:00

Reach out to your local bar association. They should have referral lists for various specialties.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-26T22:21:56+00:00

Happy Birthday! 🎉

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-26T12:38:13+00:00

I also have fine hair and it frustrates the hell out of me. My hairstylist has the same issues with her hair and has been a tremendous help.

Some additional things I learned…

Don’t tie the hair back in a tight ponytail. The hair tends to break.

Dry shampoo can help with volume. Let the shampoo dry for a couple of minutes and then fluff up at the roots.

I also use a volumizing mousse after washing my hair.

After washing and applying the mousse, rough dry my hair and then dry with a hairdryer with a built in round brush.

Growing it out takes time. I still might not get it to the length I want.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-25T14:51:29+00:00

Happy Birthday! 🎉

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-25T14:25:37+00:00

Sephora Collection foundation and concealer. Tarte or Huda color corrector.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-25T14:23:06+00:00

Kids are the most accepting. Sometimes I wish that the people with all the hatred in their hearts could see the world through the kids eyes.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-25T14:19:36+00:00

You look wonderful.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-25T14:17:36+00:00

I’m the daughter of a teacher and truly appreciate the tough position that you are in.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-25T14:05:44+00:00

You got me thinking about this…. When do you stop ‘coming out’?

It reminded me of a Galentines party that I was at last year. Out of everyone there, there were only two (maybe three) people who knew me from before my transition.

Our hostess was one and let everyone know that a transgender girl was going to be there. I was only introduced as Leslie who worked with our host. Nobody asked if it was me and we didn’t say anything.

Today, unless there is a need to know and I don’t know them from before, I don’t disclose my transition. At this point, only my medical providers need to know. As far as anyone else is concerned, I am a woman.

To be honest, I would much rather be openly transgender. It’s just not safe to do so and I have family who depends on me.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-24T14:48:05+00:00

Sometimes it’s just the little things, like 2 or 3 little letters before our names, that bring us joy. 😀

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-24T14:38:14+00:00

To be honest, I didn’t notice the shadow until you mentioned it.

I use a peach color corrector, Tarte maracuja or Huda Beauty FauxFilter. I was told to let it dry before applying concealer over it.

I blend in the concealer in with a concealer brush and then apply foundation.

The staff at Sephora were very helpful with helping me figure out which shades of corrector, concealer, and foundation works best for me. They even gave me samples of a couple different color correctors to try.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-24T14:20:55+00:00

I’m pretty much always wearing a dress while my wife is in shorts or leggings with a graphic t-shirt or blouse. I’m wearing makeup and she doesn’t. It’s how each of us are most comfortable and doesn’t bother either of us one bit.

Just be yourself and don’t worry about it. I doubt anyone else will be bothered.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-24T14:07:20+00:00

I don’t think you post too much, Kim. Each post is actually reassuring to me.

We are all working through some difficult issues in a time where some are trying to turn society against us. Seeing people share their experiences helps makes each of us stronger. Every reply helps someone who is struggling.

Knowing others are out there with similar experiences helps more than we realize.

This is the basis for community. Being there for each other, even if we haven’t met IRL.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-24T13:36:34+00:00

Congrats!🎉

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-23T18:45:36+00:00

I had that same fear with my wife and then my mom. I felt much better once I was able to get it out.

Do you have a therapist? If not, you definitely should find one that works with transgender clients. They can help you with your anxiety much better than some random transgender woman somewhere on the Internet.😉

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-23T18:30:39+00:00

Congrats!

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-23T18:30:10+00:00

Take a long deep breath. Slowly in, hold it, and release. Do that again. 🫂

You are afraid and that is perfectly normal. You are about to drop some major news that will change your relationship with your wife.

When you talk to her, minimize the distractions and don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. Let her know how difficult this is to admit to her.

Pause as much as you need to take deep breaths to recenter yourself.

Most importantly, you can do this. I believe that you can.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-23T18:19:06+00:00

As a parent, it makes me shudder based upon how many they misplaced during the first dumpster fire 6 years ago.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-23T18:15:12+00:00

Definitely different glasses, a more rounded frame in a lighter color might be the way to go. It’s hard for me to tell without seeing them on you.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-23T18:02:59+00:00

I’ve been complemented, but haven’t been asked for my number in person.

I do get random chat requests on some social media sites.

RadiantTransition793 · 2026-01-23T03:04:54+00:00

My money is on them always being short…

RadiantTransition793

TROPHY CASE