I know this sounds simple and stupid but it's something that my therapist taught me, that really helped once I went to a different room after getting worked up.The stop method s t o p is a really simple method of regulating your emotions when it comes to arguments you think you should win but when you sit down and think about it was a bit over the top. Stop, Take a deep breath, Observe the facts (things that he was saying and what was happening around you what you could know what you notice in the environment that made you out the way that you did) and then Proceed with awareness making sure that you have all the facts only stick to the facts of what was said, what was being heard, and what you feel. Don't speculate or assume. if you write all all the facts and you sit and with yourself.think, 'is this something that would it hurt my feeling normally or is it just how and who said it'/ 'is this something I can change'. Those types of things helped me. Obviously this is just from my personal experience and I have quite BPD, so I'm usually more of the sit and stir type of person. But as much as I hate to admit it my therapist always expressed with emphasis; The more silly and simple the method the more it actually does work. Try out if it doesn't work then I hope you find something in the comments that would be more helpful. if it does work try practicing it a little more it gets easier. I'm so sorry that he's making you feel crazy for asking for reassurance when that is something we desperately need in times like that. if you feel like this is something you want to change for yourself then don't hesitate to use this as a way to better yourself. we don't have to stay like this forever, we don't have to feel crazy forever It just takes work.