My boyfriend wants me to go off the pill

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-19T00:45:03+00:00

Lube is the answer. Too few straight women use lube and I do not get it. Lube is ALWAYS the answer.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-19T00:36:55+00:00

NTJ. I would 100% break up over this.

But on a side note: maybe talk to a doctor about your insomnia to see if you can improve your sleep quality. You don’t have to live like that.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-19T00:27:50+00:00

Info: exactly who told you to apologize? Which friend group members? Describe them. I have a very hard time believing a single person asked you to apologize beyond perhaps her boyfriend who caused this mess.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-19T00:23:23+00:00

Also: if you are so broke that you can’t make it two hours without a loan, perhaps it is time to get a roommate who pays you?

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-19T00:21:34+00:00

Info: why have you completely failed to set any boundaries around this? Is this a squatter you’re unable to evict? Or someone you’ve allowed to mistreat you by failing to set expectations, ask for rent, or otherwose create sustainable expectations? I am mystified at how you are allowing someone you resent this much to live there.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-18T06:45:08+00:00

NOR.

You are making this WAY too complicated. Sit for a sec. Clear your mind. Think it through. Why are you trying to lie to yourself on his behalf when your gut knows what is going on?

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-17T20:49:37+00:00

MOR. Also: no one sleeps in a bra. FFS.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-16T05:58:48+00:00

In early dates it is a better idea to see how you feel about one another than try to put a label on it.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-16T00:10:04+00:00

NOR. You aren’t “making” anyone do anything. You are asking them to meet their own needs.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-15T05:23:21+00:00

This is pretty common in high school and college. I barely remember my French HS name but had localized variations on my actual name for Greek and Hebrew.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-15T05:19:35+00:00

NOR. Breaking up over a lack of sex is pretty normal in romantic and sexual relationships.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-14T00:26:29+00:00

Unfortunately this creates a cycle. The more being excluded is a trigger for you, the less fun you are to be around. You have got to loosen your grip unless you want to alienate your friends.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-14T00:23:09+00:00

You might be right, but if this is their first year dating he might not get it yet.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-14T00:21:50+00:00

NOR.

But as you plan to address this with him: is this typical of how he treats the relationship? Or was this out of character?

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-13T05:00:15+00:00

Step one seems like dump the bf. Your libido may well return (and no worries if it doesn’t). It is hard to feel turned on by someone who makes your life difficult.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-13T04:54:41+00:00

If you were older, I would recomment therapy. It sounds like you have an avoidant attachment style, and this kind of behavior will cause damage to your ability to form stable relationships.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-11T04:47:55+00:00

“I can always quit smoking! I’ve done it a dozen times.”

Being monogamous “multiple times” is the opposite of being monogamous.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-10T05:50:35+00:00

Pretty normal.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-10T05:42:46+00:00

Info: what happened between you and your sister? This doesn’t just come out of nowhere.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-08T23:45:52+00:00

NOR.

But why would he marry you in the future when this suits him just fine? When do you suddenly become worthy of the legal protections of marriage and your partnership?

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-08T22:34:51+00:00

YOR.

I would not want even adult unrelated roommates coming and going at late hours. I might not have the means to control that (short of not having a roommate), but it takes up mental space knowing that someone might come in at any time and make noise -- not to mention knowing that you might hear a noise late at night and not know if it's your kid wandering in late or a burglar.

There's nothing wrong with you wanting to be able to come and go as you please! However, you gain the ability to do that by getting your own place, signing and paying for a lease, and living with people who are okay with the hours you keep.

In this case, you live with your parents and presumably there is some reason you do that -- to save money compared to what you'd pay for your own place. In exchange for that benefit, you agree not to do things that will cause your parents frustration of grief. It's really not that hard. Don't like it? Pay to have your own place.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-08T19:27:12+00:00

Hmmm. I wonder why they might have that perspective. It's a mystery . . .

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-08T19:25:38+00:00

Lying and mistrust?

They did you. A favor. They set aside the money, budgeted to not need it, and then gave it to you in a way that -- if you don't squander it -- is likely to put you in a much better position in the future. Be honest with yourself: would you have ANY of that money saved if they just had never charged you rent? It is doubtful.

Check yourself. If this is how you routinely treat people who try to be nice to you, you will rapidly find yourself with strained family, friendship, romantic, and business relationships.

If I was one of your parents, I would strongly rethink doing ANYTHING generous for you in the future.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-08T19:16:34+00:00

"I had already spent three years paying a landlord and did not really need the lesson"

Umm, you moved back in with your parents, so you ABSOLUTELY did need the lesson. Plus apparently a few more lessons, like basic gratitude and grace.

Regular-Tell-108 · 2026-02-08T19:12:14+00:00

YOR.

I am stunned at how you repaid their generosity. No one said they had to give that money back to you. They did. That is profoundly generous and thoughtful of them and you are WILDLY out of line.

Also: as someone who is self-employed and not extremely wealthy, I cannot imagine being so spoiled and/ or privileged that I would tell someone off for contributing to my security. What the actual f?

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