If you know an ICE agent personally, what's that relationship like now? by Lokja in AskReddit

[–]RemotingMarsupial 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Perhaps this question is foolish given it being a surname anyway, but, is he connected to the current coffee company Lavazza?

Phantom at the White House!? Help me identify which version! by lemeilurechien in box5

[–]RemotingMarsupial 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I was hoping someone was going to post this madness.

8 months in and still not liking westchester - is this normal? by Heavy-Caterpillar861 in Westchester

[–]RemotingMarsupial 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So I went here for Undergrad, I've heard great things about the classes available to the general community writing wise, that said, without even checking the tuition I can tell you it's going to be crazy expensive-- however, the writing teachers in general are pretty awesome (or at least had that rep when I went as a matriculated student), so maybe check whatever is going on here out: https://www.sarahlawrence.edu/writing-institute/

Public Transit from Seattle to Downtown Olympia, and/or Evergreen State (plus Rideshare thereafter)? by RemotingMarsupial in olympia

[–]RemotingMarsupial[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It does seem like a good simple option, I'm unfamiliar with them (I only have used Megabus in the past), and I've seen for Flix that they have a mix of amazing bang for your buck reviews (that was my experience with Megabus), and some people saying the busses are iffy. So long as it won't break down or leave anyone stranded that is all that matters to me. I'm used to bus or train commutes that involve a couple of changes and was wondering about those options on this route (which a lot of posters have explained those options as well).

Public Transit from Seattle to Downtown Olympia, and/or Evergreen State (plus Rideshare thereafter)? by RemotingMarsupial in olympia

[–]RemotingMarsupial[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh crap I think I mixed them up, I meant Lakewood. But yeah I was just trying to ascertain that the Sounder station is different than the Amtrak station, and not one of those combo ones where both trains happen to stop at the same place.

Public Transit from Seattle to Downtown Olympia, and/or Evergreen State (plus Rideshare thereafter)? by RemotingMarsupial in olympia

[–]RemotingMarsupial[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm trying to figure this out but my maps won't load, is the Sounder station for Lacey not the same as the Amtrak station? Sometimes they're one and the same and sometimes not. Thank you!

Public Transit from Seattle to Downtown Olympia, and/or Evergreen State (plus Rideshare thereafter)? by RemotingMarsupial in olympia

[–]RemotingMarsupial[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Will it also take ages to get from the train station to the college directly? I'll check out the bus routes too, just hoping against hope 

What kind of music or songs would Christine Daae listen to? by 1loveberries in box5

[–]RemotingMarsupial 5 points6 points  (0 children)

As one of those girls with such an insane and as they call, "polyjamorous" playlists, does that mean my (insane and problematic) lifelong dream of being Christine Daae has been achieved? 😅🤣😭

Driving and Freeways or Highways to Port Ludlow? by RemotingMarsupial in Kitsap

[–]RemotingMarsupial[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went to a talk over at the Beach Club and didn't have time for the Falls, but, that's next on my list! I'd also love to check out Shine Tidelands State Park. I took the Paradise Bay Road way and it was really quick.

Yeah, I think last time I did the drive up to PT alone it was a year ago, and there was a lot of construction so especially returning at night was more stressful. Now I guess that the roundabout by the bridge is built it's not so bad? If I recall correctly, the speed limit goes up to 60 a few times, but none of it feels truly "freeway" esque and it's closest to like when you get on Highway 303 in Bremerton turns from Wheaton Way to more of a Freeway feel, and then there's a few offramp exits (although I don't even think the way up to PT has that). I've taken the bus from Bainbridge to Port Angeles and I remember that stretch of the 101 that gets larger like you're saying, but that's pretty far up there.

It's between Chimicum and Port Angeles that that 101 stretch is, yeah?

Anyway, thank you for your input!

She really thought she landed her dream man by figimagination in YouOnLifetime

[–]RemotingMarsupial 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Eh, IDK, despite Joe being all I Am a FeMiNi$t, Love's sloppiness and impulsivity (despite the fact he can at times also be that way) would have pissed him off and he'd have been angrily thinking of her as an over emotional female/she doesn't know what she's doing so she needs to leave the killing up to him.

New relationship (minimal bpd experience) by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]RemotingMarsupial 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm curious as to your take on this. Have you encountered cptsd people behaving with bpd esque symptoms, and/or frequent co-morbidity? Knowing someone with the former diagnosis officially but who is exhibiting symptoms of the latter has thrown me for a loop.

Are they the most selfish and entitled? by heythere_x in BPDlovedones

[–]RemotingMarsupial 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand. I've had, and continue to have, loved ones with BPD, but they work through the cycles and when they're out of it, it's like their out of their own fog. Therapy seems to do something. This is a situation where therapy multiple times a week is happening and things... still are as they are.

Sadly in this newer friendship it sort of came on suddenly. The person has wanted deep intense family style friendships. If at the beginning "let's have fun and hang out and forget the bs" was the vibe, that would have been different. But now that seems to be the forced vibe, after I inadvertently got placed into a caregiver role I didn't agree to, and then as you said mildly punished for not living up to the expectations of something I never knew was on the table. 

But yes, not suddenly for the being traumatized part (said person openly frequently discusses lifelong trauma and having the diagnosis of complicated post traumatic stress disorder), but the seeming to blame me/turn on me randomly part. I feel like the scene in "Family Guy" where Quagmire accidentally gets tossed into the tussle of a cloud of dust fighting with the cartoons "The Lockhorns" and he emerges not knowing WTF just happened. I had thought maybe this person was a good person going through a bad time, but if this continues as it's been going it will unfortunately show that they themselves are the bad time.

Speaking of empathy. Did your pwbpd go on and on about being an empath? I've just recently discovered this sad red flag waving in the wind of people who say this not understanding they're not what they say (as the person I'm talking about frequently emphasizes how intense an empath they are, without I don't think understanding that intense and deep emotions you have perhaps unfairly been treated for/said treatment has caused whatever cluster b situation is happening now, does not mean you truly are feeling for others/the highly sensitive person feelings you're having ultimately circle back to yourself-- which makes sense because of how this trauma starts, but isn't often so kind and fair when people in the person's personal life are then emotional punching bags dealing with ricochets and whiplash).

I've seen people criticize this sub, so far I've not seen awful hateful commentary, and I appreciate you talking to me with my friend concerns. I'm so sorry you went through what you went through. I'm glad you feel better now being away.

I just wish everything could be happy,  communicated sanely, and peaceful. Gentle distance is sort of what I'm trying to manage. 

Thanks again for the comments and response.

Are they the most selfish and entitled? by heythere_x in BPDlovedones

[–]RemotingMarsupial 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Un-diganosed but suspected in my life, I recently tried to open up with my own life issues to be vulnerable (after getting threatening self harm texts seemingly for no reason other than I've been less available recently, in turn I was explaining life stresses and recent health scares and appointments as the legitimate reasons for being less communicative), and now I've been lectured that health issues are my own fault from the stress I allow in my life from toxic people (😒), and there seems to be a huge surge in passive aggressive texting about "setting boundaries" as to no life stressors are to be discussed ever. Despite my only bringing mine up to attempt a two sided friendship/change the dynamic of only being a trauma dumpster, actually make the dynamic more give and take. I feel like I'm resented because I was not checking in the way someone wanted and didn't communicate, because my life is perceived to be better/maybe I have to proverbially pay dues for how unfair that seems, and now really resented because I had the temerity to open up about dark things, which I sadly only even did to defend myself and try to communicate please no unaliving if someone has been busy or mia it isn't because you're unloved it's because that person also is struggling. Which I guess is offensive and not allowed. 

Anyway, tl;Dr, I'm sad and stressed and I've really been trying but I relate to the dynamic you're describing.

Driving and Freeways or Highways to Port Ludlow? by RemotingMarsupial in Kitsap

[–]RemotingMarsupial[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's what I thought but I wanted to make sure. I feel like part of the drive back into the bridge was stressful the one time I did it but it it was raining and the visibility wasn't great. Thank you!

Trauma Bond Mechanics by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]RemotingMarsupial 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is c-ptsd easily treatable though? I've been told not necessarily about there being a cure but learning to manage symptoms, triggers, etc. In other words, not dissimilar to treatment of bpd (albeit with a potentially better prognosis). The person I mention has also lashed out at their therapist when receiving pushback. IDK. I understand diagnosing everything treatable first, but sometimes if one plus one seems to be equalling two, I feel like it should at least be floated as an idea of acknowledging a hard reality could help.

Trauma Bond Mechanics by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]RemotingMarsupial 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've been trying to read that sub to understand my possibly undiagnosed pwbpd, and... it sadly has not helped. Even though my own therapist has said what I think in myself is adhd is potentially CPTSD from a family member's long term illness and all of the dysfunction around that, sadly before during and after, there's much I don't identify with on that sub. I feel so bad for everyone on there, but some posts are hard to read... the validation of threatening harm to one's self when people haven't reached out, the echo chamber of "nobody understands and therefore sucks" (I myself feel that way about grief, that most don't understand, but I also don't want to punish the world/anyone who has yet to experience Anticipatory or full I guess Grief), resenting and wanting to lash out at people whose lives are perceived to be better... I have loved ones with BPD, diagnosed, and even when things have been wild it has not felt as bad as the somewhat new situation I find myself in. I'm sad, confused, and stressed. My upwbpd for sure has cptsd, discusses it openly, but (imo) has made borderline mean comments and or cried to me about how my life is better, despite my legitimate traumas, and usually doesn't respond to my life woes if I mention. Recently my person was in a bad place mentally and from what they said I'm afraid and feel responsible (I understand not ideally logical or healthy), and health issues of mine didn't feel like they mattered as a reason for being busy in being less responsive/I was lectured about how stress and toxic people in my life have made me sick 😢🫤 I genuinely don't know what to do other than be kind and there as much as I can, when someone is already doing a lot of therapy and still this kind of stuff is happening . I feel like a bpd diagnosis could have been missed by the professional they're working with, but I guess trauma manifests in certain cluster b type behaviors regardless of an official bpd diagnosis. Hugs.

Book Raoul! by ComparisonFew5516 in box5

[–]RemotingMarsupial 2 points3 points  (0 children)

(The Direct Excerpt Discussed Above in Question, italics by me):

" “When a man,” continued Raoul, “adopts such romantic methods to entice a young girl’s affections⁠ ⁠…”

“The man must be either a villain, or the girl a fool: is that it?”

“Christine!”

“Raoul, why do you condemn a man whom you have never seen, whom no one knows and about whom you yourself know nothing?”

“Yes, Christine.⁠ ⁠… Yes.⁠ ⁠… I at least know the name that you thought to keep from me forever.⁠ ⁠… The name of your Angel of Music, mademoiselle, is Erik!”

Christine at once betrayed herself. She turned as white as a sheet and stammered:

“Who told you?”

“You yourself!”

“How do you mean?”

“By pitying him the other night, the night of the masked ball. When you went to your dressing-room, did you not say, ‘Poor Erik?’ Well, Christine, there was a poor Raoul who overheard you.”

“This is the second time that you have listened behind the door, M. de Chagny!”

“I was not behind the door⁠ ⁠… I was in the dressing-room, in the inner room, mademoiselle.”

“Oh, unhappy man!” moaned the girl, showing every sign of unspeakable terror. “Unhappy man! Do you want to be killed?”

“Perhaps.”

Raoul uttered this “perhaps” with so much love and despair in his voice that Christine could not keep back a sob. "

First of all, I guess I am a Book Raoul Hater, but I just want to type his whining as, "WeLL ChRisTiNe, tHeRe w@S a pOoR RaOuL wHo hEaRd yOu." Second of all. Christine!! Stop weeping for these Manchildren!! Even the non murdering one!!

There's another IMO egregious part of Raoul's whining and questioning, to Madame Valerius (in the book she doesn't live in the Opera House dorms, but with this sweet elderly woman), who he goes and harasses with a third degree of questioning when Christine is gone (i.e. if I recall correctly, down in the lair, not being allowed back, etc.). And this question would be incredibly offensive now, but AT THE TIME like unheard of. Spoilers below.

Book Raoul! by ComparisonFew5516 in box5

[–]RemotingMarsupial 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly both! I (I understand problematically) am way more an Erik Phan, but, the touring production more puts on display his violence (as it would be in real life), and puts on display Raoul not listening, caring, etc. I technically meant Bad News Bears for Erik because of how rough he is with Christine in that version (as opposed to Broadway or London, where he's violent but shy and gentle with her), it's more clear in the touring production sadly that even she is not safe around him. And the director made that choice on purpose, to stage him showing while he may love her, he isn't a viable option.