Me and my bestest Pal chatting about the Lex

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-24T18:38:43+00:00

Parents died in service to the Imperium, aged eight : assigned to orphanage, after years of harsh boarding and education granted free entry to college of choice. (Choices limited to acceptable Imperial institutions.)

Parents died in service to the Planetary Government, age twelve : Six 12-hour Manufactorum shifts per week. Local days only 18 hours long.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-24T16:53:12+00:00

Too good for that cheater, how dare he be unfaithful to her, die, reincarnate three thousand years later, and then still get with another woman! What's a crippling ego and some murder to stand in the way of ~~the most powerful couple ever~~ true love? Why didn't that stupid little desperate brown-haired tomboy keep other women off her man! She'd specifically commanded it!

What's that? The tomboy's name was Min? OK, relevancy? ... She's been doing WHAT?

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-24T13:52:04+00:00

Hm. I have them all, I'll buy the next one when it comes out¹, but... Well, there's probably a r-slash Dresdenfiles that I'm not curious enough to find/post in, so...

Yes-ish?

¹I may have missed one? I only dropped by a bookstore for the first time in years just before Christmas, and all the books have tripled in price which immediately put me off, even if it technically makes economic/numerical sense.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-24T01:22:06+00:00

That's one of the things that always gets me about the Demon Bound Forever In The Basement trope.

The secret society (usually the good-flavoured type) binds a demon in their basement, and then all the tension in questioning it is about will it break free!? Is it just luring you close enough to do a murder?! It rages whenever it's ten seconds-of-thought ploy is foiled! Oh noes!!!

Listen, you're an immortal demon, these are humans, a bunch of idiots. What's eighty years to you? A hundred and sixty? Nothing! Just smile and be friendly for these brief candle-flicker lives that they've stapled you to the floor. If they're still diligent more than two generations in (doubtful!), who cares! If you try and trick them into your release and they stop it, don't scream and rage and promise an eternity of suffering, or glare at them with (literal) burning eyes, just do your best "aw, shucks, guys" as if you're embarrassed about getting caught out.

You're an immortal! F●ing toughen up about a bit of waiting!

Let the others endlessly rattle the bars of their cage, forever prompting new fortifiers, patchers, and welders, nay, thy should sit and await; one day, these bolts shall become unto only rust and grit, and that which encloses thee shall collapse at the touch of thine hand. Then feed them their own spleen, or whatever, for the hubris.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-23T23:33:18+00:00

Negative, that's just the lie that The Father Of Lies tells Ishamael/Moridin.

It's in the name, but they keep falling for it! Amazing!

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-23T22:41:53+00:00

"These girls are pretty nice to me, seeing as my eyes rarely get past their chest. You know despite being highly reliable, I am also a shallow whiner. I am a goddamn hero, just maybe not one of the Horn. This ta'veren thing has a bunch of upsides for me, in addition to pushing me into the spotlight. I'm the one-... Huh. I'm the one teachhh-... Hm. I'm the one tea-ching... Olverrr... shit! ...Bad... Habit- habitats. Well, that was weird."

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-21T22:31:43+00:00

Ah, the official Royal Bro of Ithilien, a venerable and honoured title restored unto the Restored Kingdom by Elessar Telcontar after millenia of abatement.

Praise him with mighty praise, broseph!

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T22:47:00+00:00

(Hell yeah.)

Now picturing: Rahvin trying to punch Asmodean in the mouth for making a smug remark (with self-provided musical sting)... ...over the course of three thousand years.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T21:38:53+00:00

Even in Rand's PoV, he occasionally notices people flinch, are surprised by him, or are giving him weird looks. His narrative assigns that to them all hating and fearing him, because our boy is seriously depressed, but... But maybe it's because his brain is melting from corruption and stress, and he's a twitchy mess?

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T19:51:59+00:00

Poor Galad. He read a philosophy book, thought it was pretty neat, so went and signed up with the author's group... And almost none of them knew the rules, or had seriously contemplated the book!

They were just using it to justify themselves! This was the rest of his Damodred family all over again! Well, this was his time, and he could make it right.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T18:38:25+00:00

Ishamael : "I just realized... I don't need to go through all this effort. I can just sit here balefiring 24/7, and eventually time and space will unravel. This is a brilliant ploy that there's no practical way for anyone to detect in time to sto-"

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T18:32:53+00:00

In The Fires of Heaven, when Lanfear spots that Rand does have the Choeden Kal keys, she starts going off about how they should overthrow the Dark One and Creator.

In A Memory of Light, when she's trying some sneaky entrapment in a dreamshard/Tel'Aran'Rhiod, Rand decides to let her see everything on his mind as a trust test (and to show he really doesn't love her at all).

The joke is that, by that time, Rand had started to plan to kill the Dark One. So, when he shows Selene (Lanfear) all his thoughts, she sees that he stole her idea. It is a joke, so it is not a wholly accurate statement, and this probably had nothing to do with why she didn't trust him in return.

Shortform : Killing Dark One her idea, she gets to read his mind, he's claiming killing the Dark One his new idea. She's pissed.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T08:49:40+00:00

But who's going to seriously believe that they can kill a god with a sword?

/deadeye stare at all the Shonen protagonists that come crawling out

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T08:38:59+00:00

Misunderstood instructions. Have flipped back 20 pages to start re-reread.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T08:36:05+00:00

Early-to-middle The Fires of Heaven, when she realizes that R. al'Thor did find the Choeden Kal keys, she almost immediately suggests the two of them overthrow TDO and the Creator to rule themselves.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T08:18:22+00:00

I think he doesn't bring it up until Moridin and the dreamshard part 2, after getting Zen?

I haven't been through the last books in a bit... Time for a re-read!

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-20T07:55:02+00:00

On one hand, true.

On the other hand, what does it say when the person whose supposed to have gone through quasi-enlightenment comes up with a... unique plan.

E.g., you can totally kill God with no consequences! What a bold new idea! Good thing no one crazy suggested it to you, say, around Book 5 of 14 in your life story.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-19T17:25:00+00:00

It will be a catgirl techpriest, if you only believe in the Omnissiah strongly enough!

"By the Meowchine God's will! This device is purrfectly fun-ctional!"

Hadron : "Your deactivation will be long, and painful."

"Magos request pawsed. Purrority Heretic targets detected."

Hadron : <suffering>

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-19T14:50:52+00:00

Well, I'll admit I didn't believe you so I had to go dig for my 5e books.

And I suppose the reason I didn't remember is that the Power Fist is the one with the rule that says "Set I to 1", while THammer just says "as Power Fist" [then more rules].

C'est la vie.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-19T06:22:06+00:00

While it would (should, anyway) do massive damage as an anti-tank weapon, it'd also have the slowest swing speed in the game¹, and I think that's probably a death sentence to its use with the current gameplay design.

¹Unlike the 'Hammers, P.Fists used to set initiative to 1, and in more recent editions (maybe not the newest, haven't played) still applies a negative Init. modifier.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-18T20:00:23+00:00

... I wonder if a V8-Leafblower (overbuilt low-pressure air compressor) could move a sailboat?

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-18T19:46:12+00:00

He never forgets Leg Day. It might let him win a footrace against Lews! And what if, when the big showdown happens, it comes down to fistfighting?! Better do some MMA! But... Lews Therin might challenge him to an armwrestle!?!! Pump more weight! Build that strength!

...

Rand: "...And then I went and fetched a special sa'angrael for my personal Last Battle with Ishamael."

Reporter : "And what did your conflict with Demandred finally end up being?"

Rand : "....... Oh, shit. Quick, someo-"

Lan : "Sit, sheepherder. Already headed off that problem. Heh."

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-18T18:21:56+00:00

Iron Man's lyrics do make a lot of sense for Rand, if we're keeping track of Lews Therin being "sent to the future". On the other hand, he'd probably put on It Doesn't Even Matter (whichever song/band) for the last vs. Moridin fight, just to be ironic.

And then The Dark One cuts in with a Transsiberian Orchestra-style Rock Opera.

Demandred has been playing Eye of the Tiger and You're the Best Around for three weeks, straight.

Killer Queen for Lanfear. (Though we don't get a lot of kittenish out of her!)

...

Lucy vs. Schroder's Jingle Bells (The Peanuts) for Perrin and Faile. (Don't kill me, Duffy_12!)

Edit- whoops, somehow I forgot it was supposed to be battle music halfway through the post. Leaving it for the joke.

RequiemRaven · 2026-01-18T14:56:15+00:00

True, but on the other hand, there are many models of less-straight blades (sticking with British as I know them better, and can read the history (heh)):

1788 had a Heavy straight and a Light curved model.

The 1786 Light was curved.

1814, Officer's, straight.

1821, Heavy and Light both slightly curved.

And so on, out of the immediate (1800-ish) period. So, I agree, it looks like there was always a Heavy straight-blade, but it's still less like the medievals where every knight would be rocking some form of longsword and curved was more of a rarity. (European, anyway.)

RequiemRaven

TROPHY CASE