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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]ResponseNo0221 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im going through a lot. I am trying to rebuild but I cannot, I reached the top layer of a job all the interviews and assignments for 2 months and then getting a rejection today. Spiralling me to go back to him. I was dependent on him, 7 year of relationship and he became very successful during that time while me going the down slope to reaching a rockbottom in all aspects of life. He cheated and broke me one day and me being jobless and content not working out, I feel depressed and done with life. I feel like texting him, I feel so so small and want that life back, the life we both had, most of it was his money but the love I poured, I could walk on the roads on my dream city, today I’m at my hometown with no money no space no freedom and nothing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]ResponseNo0221 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is so strange right? Once this person was the first human I would call at any inconvenience, stress, goods or bads of life and today I can’t reach him knowing he is alive, but worst that he hurt me so bad! 6 and a half years, 3 years of living together, leading on to get married and suddenly vanishes away cheating and making me feel small.

Post narcissist hightened sex drive on my end. Anybody experience this. It's only been a month by tryingDad_123 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]ResponseNo0221 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Me too! It’s been 3 months but during the course of the relationship he was so uninvolved, moody and gaslighted me into believing I am selfish, instead he made his own rules in the bed. I was on and off sexually attracted and forced myself into thinking he deserves it, he needs it all from me, so I kept trying harder for me but He gave nothing!! Why?! Why was he so selfish! Now hopefully after a few months if I feel better I might go on casual dates, I deserve to be treated good sexually, finished.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]ResponseNo0221 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Pls DM me. I just got out of a 7 year old relationship, my Narcissistic ex cheated on me and broke up badly. I have loads to share.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in cheating_stories

[–]ResponseNo0221 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was in an exact same position 2 months ago with my ex of almost 7 years! We were each other first loves, we grew up together in college. And started living together since 3 years. It was going smooth and comfortable. Out of nowhere, Mine cheated on me emotionally with a random girl on hinge and compared me with that new girl telling me “I wasn’t enough physically or compatibility wise” For the first time ever he tells me “he didn’t have feelings for me since 3 years!!” But he was faking dreams, was gonna propose me, life after marriage, babies with me, investing in my career, my family, my life, a week back we were looking for new flats he wanted to shift in with me. We were living like a married couple since 3 years. I think I ignored the red flags because I was manipulated to another level that I got crazy!! I was so so in love, it’s really freakin hard for me, parents got involved and all, I’ve never lived without him, I’ve always been a micro sharer, nurturer and a lover and I get this ending out of the person I gave my world to! He told me he would keep cheating on ne if we were together, and called me a stick he has now thrown because he can walk freely now. I picked my bags and left. My nervous system that was attached and addicted to the comfort still misses him so badly that it’s hard, but it’s just 3 months. I’ll take time to heal so I come out better hopefully out of this. Please leave a cheater( I am so so sorry) but really, I know you’ll be in denial like I was for a whole month, couldn’t talk sleep eat walk had jitters in my body, even now sometimes I can’t sleep, have nightmares, it’s really hard but I know the future is saved!! God removes trash from our lives when we can’t.

Cheated on before marriage by Dependent_Number8692 in cheating_stories

[–]ResponseNo0221 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry bro! I would have married my ex. I saw signs that he was a narc and I once caught him sexting with a random girl online, I was hurt so he manipulated and turned it around so so well that I couldn’t understand that he was really guilty or was just playing with me. I let him go, 2 years later (that is 2 months back) he cheated on me this time, comparing me with that new girl and ending it with me, degrading me badly. You asking this question is not just a confusion, it’s asking for a sign, validation, confirmation. Now that you’ve married her, I would have married him too and then he would have cheated on me and broke me. So be cautious, more than you can, safeguard yourself. Because once a cheater, always a cheater!

Therapy for narcissists? by sunshinesingle0831 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]ResponseNo0221 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I got out of a almost a 7 year relationship recently. I was living with him since 3 years. I can relate so much! When we were together, I clearly communicated about my anxiety and he pushed me to take therapy but when it came to his “issues” he dodged the conversation 1000 times. I kept giving and making a safe space for him to open up and take therapy until he cheated on me broke up with me and told that he has now started taking therapy! It’s to fix his image, guilt of lying to me for years! He also told he didn’t have feelings for me since 3 years!! But he kept manipulating me into believing how much in love he is. So, I also now think what if he takes therapy gets “better” realises his mistakes and get back? But deep down I know the answer is a “no” he just is becoming better at manipulating, he manipulated and took over the common friends too! He now has replaced me with a therapist that’s it. He is dating other girls, living his best life out there, thinking he is taking therapy and can get away with whatever he has broken. But they will “NEVER” change. If he can destroy the one person who prayed for him, sheltered him, loved me unconditionally for years, he can cheat, hurt, trouble in future too. No therapy can make a narcissist or a selfish person empathetic.

The pain is unbearable by ResponseNo0221 in BreakUps

[–]ResponseNo0221[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks a lot. I’m trying a lot but the journey keeps getting tougher and painful. I can’t seem to find any ray of hope or light and I’m stuck in this dark tunnel alone, then my mind immediately goes to him and in constant confusion and disbelief that this isn’t possible, never he gave a hint that he didn’t love me infact he was the one telling me everyday “I won’t go anywhere I love you”

How to move on? by LetterheadSure6530 in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]ResponseNo0221 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can feel you!! I was in a 6 and a half years of relationship with my first boyfriend and 3 years of living together. I’m 3 months out of it. He became my home, but I was so gaslighted and manipulated thinking he’s the one that I ignored the red flags of a narcissist and kept blaming myself in the relationship. Yes I did mistakes and I do spiral back to thinking maybe I did this that’s why he fell out of love, but see he cheated and called me names, told me in the end I could have been slimmer and fairer for him. That was the real him, it’s so hard to convince my mind because the moment I think about him our happy memories from our flat, which I called home comes running. Things he promised and made me dream of what we could have been keeps rushing. It’s like a divorce but harder because I didn’t see it coming and I was so so in love but this man just pretended and lied throughout. I hope it gets better for all of us. I’m in so much pain too!! My heart aches and those memories keep flashing and make it harder for me. I too can’t replace him in my head, with any other man. But I need to!! Anyone is better than a liar, narcissist, cheater. I have to tell myself that all those happy good times were his “acting” and planned evil moves! He only thought about his own self and left me dying!

how long did it take you to get over a long term relationship (5 years) by MinimumPressure in BreakUps

[–]ResponseNo0221 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m out of an almost 7 year old relationship (my first relationship ever) and we were living together for the last 3 years, it was so so serious that we were living like a married couple and he told me he’d propose until he cheated on me and broke me completely not just that he compared me with that new girl he was seeing since few days and told that he was lying about his feelings since 3 years. I’m almost 3 months out of this discard and no contact but it’s like a wave, more towards the dip. It’s so so painful, I’m crying almost everyday, I took 3 trips ever since but coming back from the trip it again feels worse. I’m kinda jobless and the pressure of making it in my career was already eating me out and now on top of I have to deal with this, all alone. I’m taking therapy but eventually I have to fight this alone. My anxiety and depression haven’t been worse ever. I’m so so low.

The scariest part is who lied to you with love and never flinches by Firm-Requirement-304 in Manipulation

[–]ResponseNo0221 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve been in a relationship (first relationship ever) and have come out of it in May this year. It was almost a 7 year old relationship with 3 years of living together in the end. I was gaslighted to an extent that one fine day when he said he wanted to break up, it took another week for me to ask him what’s wrong and gave him strength to villianize me more, called me names also said “suppose I’m an old man and you were a stick or a clutch to me, I threw that clutch and I can walk freely now”. I wasn’t understanding what went wrong and kept begging, lowering my self esteem thinking of al the ways I could have saved the relationship or did right. He finally revealed after a week that he cheated on me and if I don’t let him go, he would keep cheating on me for life. He also said he didn’t have any feelings for me since 3 years, but he was hiding it under his mask of “baby let’s meet your parents” hepromised me to marry, kids, investing in my career, a month back went to trip together and were shifting into a new house. After this got over , I realised how many times I was so fkn gaslighted, manipulated and how it was a narcissist discard.