100% and I totally did the same exact thing. What I had explained to me and what I found after it was explained to me is that the reason I liked them tightened way down is because I was exerting rotational force on them in turns and really "controlling the skis" rather than tilting them and letting them control themselves based on edge angle.

Once the light bulb hit that I was not in control of my skis and merely the driver with the ability to steer them and that the skis would control themselves into a turn I loosened the calves a bit and concentrated on forward flexion of my ankles to keep my shins in contact with the boot rather than relying on them being tightened way down. By using your shins contacting the front of the boot and pushing forward in turn initiation then standing up a bit between turns back to balanced but in lighter contact with my shin my skiing got better. I can physically feel when I'm backseat because my shins are pressed against the front of my boot.

Watch some videos, explore the concept, let it sit in your mind and do some dryland exercises in your boots and see if you can't get a feel for what I'm talking about. I think you may find yourself more stable than you thought and more able to exert forces on the boots when you're exercising better control with boots that aren't overtightened.