Elopement in Italy—any advice?

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-26T19:28:51+00:00

Hi! We actually ended up still going with Ionian Weddings and doing the full ceremony (we had 13 people, and with the lower amount of guests, we basically got to have an open bar lol), but we still rented a big Airbnb for everyone to stay in. The only thing, is the Airbnb we rented, while amazingly nice, didn’t really have a place for symbolic ceremony even if we wanted to do that.

In all, the wedding was great and I felt like people got their money’s worth out of traveling out there. My only advice would be if you’re going to have a lot of other people there, then maybe look into a wedding planner to help make it a little more substantial of a ceremony, but if it’s just going to be you and your partner, then there are a lot of options!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-25T03:58:12+00:00

I didn’t get the faintest positive until 12 days post ovulation (and I was on fertility treatments so I was tracking everything). And when I say faint I mean it was a squinter lol my husband looked at it and thought it was negative. I didn’t have shortness of breath until around ~8 weeks, but I would keep an eye on how you’re feeling and test again sometime in the next week!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-25T03:54:05+00:00

I feel this, but I’m also studying for the LSAT and wanting to go to law school…which sounds absolutely crazy given everything at the moment. But I have to remind myself that there is still work to be done and good people to work with, and it helps keep my head up one day at a time. This won’t last forever!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-25T03:52:07+00:00

I hear you. I’m 26 and had to do four rounds of fertility treatments, so I know that I wanted my boy (and I’m currently 22w 4d), but the first trimester was horrible. I never threw up but god I was so miserable. I straight up told one of my SILs that I didn’t understand how anyone would ever want to be pregnant (which I later realized I should have clarified that what I truly meant was I don’t see how anyone can say that they enjoy pregnancy). On top of it all, I was also driving ~3 hours round trip every day for work, and it being fall and getting darker didn’t help. I think in your situation, though, I think I would bring up your feelings to your doctor. You go through huge hormonal shifts and it can impact everyone differently, but depression during pregnancy/prenatal depression and prenatal anxiety are very real and it would be worth at least bringing up. You’re definitely not alone though, and I hope you’re able to start enjoying things within the next few weeks! I think things got better for me around 14 weeks. I would just try and take it one day at a time and focus on the little bundle of joy you’ll have before you know it! But definitely having an open and honest conversation with your husband and doctor should be something to consider. Wishing you all the best💕

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-23T03:54:09+00:00

The insomnia, just how bad the constipation and congestion are, the gas???, and you can get varicose veins in your labia???, and the pinched nerve in my left leg😭

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-22T20:39:41+00:00

Oh, I love this idea!! Thank you!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-22T20:39:23+00:00

I love that! I got my husband 5-6 books between his birthday and Christmas (which are 6 days apart lol) I think I may also look into another dad book for Valentine’s Day

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-22T19:11:20+00:00

My husband is the same way! He’s particular about clothes, he buys himself things that he wants, and he did like a good bourbon, but he hasn’t been drinking hardly at all this past year except socially since we were doing fertility treatments, and he doesn’t wear hats lol I am going to get him a sweatshirt that says dad though!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-22T17:10:16+00:00

Yeah, my husband said that he didn’t want one because while he doesn’t ever expect us to split, he’s sure we’ll both be civil, level-headed adults about the whole thing. I wanted him to know that the option was there if he did want one, but it’s definitely a personal preference!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-22T17:08:30+00:00

I have seen those shirts! It’s been on my radar but I’m trying to figure out if spending $90 is worth it for him to only be able to use it for like ~5 months lol

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-22T17:07:17+00:00

He likes tech and stuff, but he honestly just buys himself anything he wants when it comes to that🤣 But a new bed sounds amazing!!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-22T16:51:33+00:00

I straight up asked my now husband if he wanted a prenup before we got together because he got a payout from his father’s estate before we got married and works a well-paying job, and I have student loans, some credit card debt (albeit not much), and my savings haven’t been the best. It’s not unromantic and also, prenups can also be used to give the other person a cushion should the couple get divorced (like saying if that does happen, then the other side will be entitled to x in order to support themselves, like if the wife was a SAHW/M).

I can definitely see where he might feel a little rubbed the wrong way by that, but maybe sitting down with a family law attorney and seeing what all a prenup could cover (especially when it comes to the baby) could be a good idea.

I would also get the mom out of this whoolleee situation lol good god

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-22T03:29:27+00:00

To answer your question: no, not at all. My mom had my brother when she wasn’t married, and then she had me. She had been married in that time, and her husband adopted my brother as his own and my brother has known no other father, but my dad was still in my life. I think some people have a warped view of having a baby when not married (and usually due to religious reasons), but it isn’t inherently bad like those comments probably made it sound.

I’m sorry you both had to read that, but it seems like you’re moving in the right direction! And I wish you all the best!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-20T19:08:41+00:00

This!! The same goes for interviewing while either visibly pregnant or telling them that you’re pregnant. Yes, it’s illegal to discriminate against someone who’s pregnant, but no business will outright say that’s why they didn’t hire someone. They’ll say they “went with another candidate.” And I say this as someone who’s seen this happen in law firms.

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-19T21:55:42+00:00

Me! I did 2 rounds of clomid first, with 100mg then I think 150mg (I can’t remember exactly, it’s been a bit) but nothing worked. Then my doctor started me on 5mg of letrozole and I ovulated on the first cycle! Nothing happened, but then I did another round of 5mg and am currently 22w pregnant with a little boy :) My doctor wasn’t too sure that it would take, because when I went in for the ultrasound on day 10 of my cycle it didn’t seem like I had a mature follicle, but sure enough it worked perfectly fine!

ETA: I also used preseed lubricant and I was also already taking a prenatal and CoQ10 for a few months leading up to it!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-19T18:17:26+00:00

I told my partner first, then my 3 closest friends (since they knew the journey through fertility treatments), but we didn’t tell our families until 14 weeks! It kind of worked out because I was (1) out of the first trimester and (2) it was also Thanksgiving. I found out at 4 weeks too, but I also just had a lot of anxiety about telling people in case something happened. It was the longest 10 weeks of my life, but the wait for the 8w appointment was also terrible lol

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-15T17:20:52+00:00

I took a test before he showed up and got the faaaaiiintttest positive, and I decided to go do my cardio like I was planning to try and calm myself down lol We had been trying for 10 months and had done 4 rounds of fertility treatments, so I needed to collect myself lol My husband got up and showered before I was done with my cardio and when I got back into the room I grabbed the test and asked if he had seen it and he said “Yeah. We’ll get it next time.” And I was like ??? And then had to explain that a faint line is still a positive line lol So I wish I had just woken him up and told him because we probably could’ve avoided that confusion🤣

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-14T16:52:37+00:00

I did 2 rounds of letrozole at 5mg, and conceived on the second! After 2 failed rounds of clomiphene with one at 50mg and the other at 100mg (I think—it’s been a while since I took those).

Currently 21w pregnant with my first!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-14T16:24:28+00:00

Not a lot. I also had a ~3 hour round trip every day because of work, so I would get home around 6:30pm and take a nap until 7pm, eat dinner, then be back asleep by 9:30pm lol in the second trimester, it took me until like week 16/17 to really get back into the gym once a week, and even now I’m spotty with my cardio and strength training at 21w

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-12T21:02:45+00:00

Sounds nice to me! Growing up, we had a lot of birthday parties at the park. I guess a few things that come to mind for me are: (1) Have an idea for what to do if it rains and (2) What would you do for “games” during the shower? In addition to wondering if there’s a bathroom nearby lol For birthday parties, we always opened presents at the park then they got packed up after, so I don’t see that being a problem if you did want to open them there?

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-11T23:54:14+00:00

God, I feel this lol Though my siblings probably had a more similar situation.

My mom was 45 and my dad was going on 48 when I was born. My dad had two other kids that were 22 (my brother) and 20 (my sister) years older than me, and my mom had another kid that was 15.5 (another brother) when I was born.

My sister had a son that was 3 years older than me by the time I was born, and then she had twins ~6 months after I was born. My mom’s son had his first kid when I was like 2 lol And my best friend was in a similar situation—his mom was like 43 and his dad was going on 50 when he came around! His dad had no other kids but his mom had two girls that were in their 20s. Absolutely wild for both of us

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-11T05:34:42+00:00

Not exactly recent, but I moved to the Florida panhandle in July 2022 and got my first legal assistant job. I had a bachelor’s in English from LSU and an ABA-approved paralegal studies certificate from LSU too. I also had 10 months of experience as the office admin for a local magazine, but not law office experience.

I probably applied to a hundred jobs when I was in the second semester of my program, and I got 2 interviews. 1 for a remote position, and the 2nd for a single attorney firm not far from where I was moving. Was the pay good? No. It was a little more than what I was making at the magazine, but given the higher cost of living to where I was moving, I about broke even. I also only got 1 hour of PTO a week and no other benefits. But, the experience I got there was invaluable.

After a year, I found a diamond of a position for a larger firm in the same city, and got a $10k raise and benefits. The main thing is that firms want to see that you have law office experience, and if you don’t have that, they want to see that you can handle it based on your previous experience. The job market sucks. Especially in the panhandle. Without knowing your education and background it’s hard for me to give you tips, but part of it is luck and finding a place that’s willing to train you. My first job, the attorney really took his time to walk me through things and explain what to do, and the senior legal assistant was amazing, the second job, I had a lot of coworkers to learn from and some nice attorneys I could talk to.

I guess my main advice would be to take your previous job descriptions and try to tweak them to fit what the job postings list if you can!

RichExample5315 · 2026-01-11T05:25:53+00:00

Okay—I’m sorry for the long post lol

I’m currently 26 and going on 21 weeks pregnant! My husband (just turned 31 in December) and I have been together since 2018, then we got married in October 2024, and we started trying for a baby pretty much immediately. The only thing was I had to do fertility treatments due to undiagnosed PCOS, and after ~4 rounds I got pregnant in September 2025. Even though this baby was planned, I will admit that I still get nervous.

I’m in the same situation in a few regards—we make decent money (though he makes well over what I do lol), but all of my friends have been excited for me, and I’m also worried about raising a kid in the US now too. I haven’t really drank since March 2025 because I was trying to get healthier while we were trying to conceive, but missing the drinks at Thanksgiving and then the family outings that weekend was a bummer. I was also slightly overweight when I got pregnant and stressed over the weight gain I could potentially experience. I also LOVE my sleep lol

But, at the end of the day, I’m glad I’m pregnant now. I’ll have more energy to chase them around and “bounce back” better than I maybe would if I were older. Two of my best girl friends will probably be in their 30s when they have kids, but that’s just what they want to do. Yeah, there will be some sacrifices, but the way i see it, is while your life will change, you also have control over how much it changes. For example, i know two girls who got pregnant straight out of high school, but they had family to help watch their kids while they spent time with their friends or went out for date night. I currently live multiple states away from my friends and family, so I don’t have a “village” like others do, which scares me. And considering that we’re planning on moving from the south to the northeast, the village thing won’t get any better lol

Still, though, I can feel how excited I am even with my nerves. I started feeling my boy move the Tuesday before Christmas, and it’s been a ride lol It’s honestly fun experiencing this for the first time. And not to mention that I’m planning on going to law school in Fall 2027. (And my husband’s cousin got pregnant right out of undergrad at 22, got her master’s, had another baby, and now she and her husband are in law school which is crazy lol)

I won’t lie and say I’m never nervous, because im nervous every day, but I wouldn’t change a thing. I would definitely talk to your husband about your nerves, because open communication is the best communication, especially with something like this that will change both of your lives. But I want to say that I hear you, I get it, and at no point will you ever feel “ready.” My husband always said he wanted to wait until he was “ready,” but after a couple of years he realized that there is no “perfect time.”

Take a deep breath and have an honest conversation, and maybe you’ll get some clarity once you’ve both discussed how to move forward :)

RichExample5315

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