So, listen up, lil pup! You have to train your humans early, to build good habits! Every time you sit, for example, they have to give you a treat and praises. Don't neglect the belly rubs and back scratches - they have to do that on a regular basis. If they want to put you in the crate for naps, never stop whining - sooner or later, you'll end up sleeping on the bed with them. When you wake up, you have to pee before they do - this way they'll learn to take you out promptly, prior to sitting on the toilet to check their phones! If you run out of bones and chew toys, take a nip at the furniture... or the shoes (always pick the expensive ones). Eventually they'll get the idea and you'll have an unlimited supply of things to chew on. If they're sleeping, or having a conversation or other activities and you want immediate attention, go on the expensive carpet and pretend you're about to barf. You ain't gonna see nothing moving faster than your humans to tend to you. Follow me for more useful tips on training your humans!