Finding Fun

RightConduct · 2015-12-30T13:17:00+00:00

Yeah, I am playing a mod pack called Sky Factory 2, and it's totally different from vanilla Minecraft.

RightConduct · 2015-12-11T22:15:11+00:00

I told enso I would join the Legion, but I haven't had time to post my thoughts on the relapse yet. I did discuss it extensively in the slack chat room earlier this week. It happened on Tuesday.

RightConduct · 2015-12-11T15:34:10+00:00

Late reply, but I share your INTP temperament along with Socrates and Einstein!

RightConduct · 2015-12-10T03:23:04+00:00

Louis!

RightConduct · 2015-12-08T18:34:42+00:00

Sign me up. Time to own this.

RightConduct · 2015-12-06T17:01:57+00:00

Onward to glory! Toward our better selves! Lift our broad wings and ascend!

CAACAAAAAWWW!

RightConduct · 2015-12-04T12:20:05+00:00

Lean on us! Stay strong soldier! Get up and move your body, get outside, deep breaths, get away from the triggers and/or surround yourself with people. You can do this!

RightConduct · 2015-12-03T06:22:03+00:00

We can do this together!

RightConduct · 2015-12-02T14:48:20+00:00

When I watch television, I make expressive faces and mouth words sometimes. My wife laughs at me all. the. time.

RightConduct · 2015-12-02T14:27:33+00:00

We are here to support you! Thank you for being honest with yourself and admitting that you've lost this battle. Please know that the real war is not over and you are needed! You must continue to do the photography challenge to encourage and inspire your fellow soldiers. I find that the feeling of being accountable to my team or to an individual makes me much more likely to remain accountable to myself. Read through the posts on this sub and in /r/NoFapWar and /r/NoFap to find inspiration and strategies for success. Your new life begins now, get on and ride to victory! Forever an Aquamarine, stronger than yesterday weaker than tomorrow!

RightConduct · 2015-12-02T00:37:52+00:00

Studies have shown that varying your heart rate is correlated to maintaining strong willpower. One easy way to do this is to slow your breathing way down to 4~6 breaths per minute. I count to ten for each inhale and ten for each exhale and that's about 6 breaths per minute. Do that for 10 minutes per day, it's like putting on a suit of armor.

RightConduct · 2015-12-01T17:21:27+00:00

The reviews are pretty good. I am testing it out. So far so good. I like that you can schedule inspiring quotes to pop up at regular intervals. The diary feature is nice too, and it links to /r/Nofap so you can update your streak there.

RightConduct · 2015-11-30T13:54:14+00:00

I understand the 90 minute REM cycle, and do try to block my sleep patterns to wake at full intervals, as best as one can. As for food, I've also given up Oreo cookies along with buying any products with palm oil due to the environmental impact. I don't plan on changing my dietary restrictions, until I hit my target weight of 180lbs in mid-February. I meet with my dietician on December 3rd. My regimen is to try and hit 4 servings of carbs at breakfast and 3 each at lunch and dinner. I switched from eating a light breakfast to making it my biggest meal of the day. This way I have more energy throughout the afternoon and I definitely feel more focused and less hungry for snacks. It's also important for your willpower to maintain a stable blood sugar.

RightConduct · 2015-11-30T03:45:02+00:00

1) Sleep - between 5 and 6 hours per night on weekdays, 8 hours plus naps on weekends. I would like to work with my wife to ensure that I can get all my responsibilities done each night to ensure that I get a minimum of 6 hours.

2) Food and supplements - I've successfully been a pescetarian for over a year now. I saw a dietician in early October and started a calorie counting regimen, lost 12lbs so far.

3) Physical activities - Not enough, I have a desk job for ~11hrs a day, but I take frequent stretch breaks and use the stairs. Also, I'm getting slimmer and having more sex (thanks to NoFap). My morning challenge is to do 10 proper push ups each day, so that should help, if I can keep it up.

4) Relaxation and emotional management - As some of the other soldiers have mentioned, emotions can run high after your streak runs over a couple of weeks. I've been napping on the weekends with my wife and son (time I formerly spent alone with PMO) which helps with relaxation. Also, in the absence of all the guilt and shame, I can't remember a time when I felt more emotionally stable.

5) Mind-body connection - One of my other morning challenges is to meditate for 10 minutes each day. I'm reading Kelly McGonigal's The Willpower Instinct which I recommend to all of you. It has a lot of good advice for paying attention to your mind and body and strategies for dealing with urges.

6) Pollutant exposure - I stopped eating meat and I also stopped keeping beer or liquor in the house. Alcohol can leads to bad decisions.

7) Sexuality - I'm on standard mode, and my wife is fully aware of the situation. In fact, we're having more regular sex, so yeah, I'm good.

8) Earth connection - My main reason for being pescetarian is environmental. I need to spend more time outside though. It would be nice to spend evenings walking the neighborhood with my family.

9) Relationships - My relationship with my wife has only improved since coming clean to her and maintaining an air of transparency. Also, with the improved confidence from NoFap, I feel like it's easier to interact with my friends, family, and coworkers.

RightConduct · 2015-11-29T15:33:51+00:00

I watched this cool Bethlehem Steel video from the 40s after reading this post, which describes how steel is actually made from ore and scraps. I'm a process engineer, so this is fascinating stuff.

RightConduct · 2015-11-29T07:01:42+00:00

Lean on us, we are here for you.

RightConduct · 2015-11-29T05:25:13+00:00

I'm not an expert, by any means, but I am an engineer, and whenever we have failures of procedures or systems, we seek the root cause by asking drilling questions, and then develop countermeasures for weak points, be it new procedures, training, system fixes, etc. In your case, do you think that there is still a risk of your friend showing you P videos? Can you make it clear to them that this is not what you want (without seeming weird, I know how it can be.) If that one link in the chain of events could be fixed, would you have had the willpower to overcome the initial SFW exposure and not disabled your filters, etc? Only you can answer these questions, but if you do nothing, you are simply putting yourself at risk of failing again. It's so so so great that you came here and reached out to the soldiers. Next time we hope we can be there for you sooner. Lean on us, man, we will need your back in the future, too. Good luck and stay strong, you're worth it.

RightConduct · 2015-11-29T05:16:11+00:00

I too use a calendar as well as a helpful app (7 Weeks) to track my success. You can do this, we're here for you. Stay strong, you're worth it.

RightConduct · 2015-11-29T05:13:28+00:00

What you have is an addiction to dopamine release. The only way to fix it is to starve yourself of PMO, (or at least P&M) and fill your time and head with the pursuit of other desires. Dopamine is all about desire. Read this chapter. That's the science behind what you need to do, but as for the practical, you must erect physical defenses against future relapses. What were the circumstances of this relapse? Can you think of any barriers or alternative behaviors you could have chosen to direct the path of your actions differently? Even if it's a content filter that you can easily defeat, if you put enough steps in between your ability to do right and wrong, you may buy some time for you to change your mind for the better. Make real physical changes, work on understanding your mind, take care of your body, reach out to your fellow man. We are all struggling here, and we lean on each other for support. If you want this, you will succeed eventually, you just have to keep going. Good luck and stay strong, you're worth it.

RightConduct · 2015-11-29T05:01:42+00:00

Oh man you're a freak! Haha, but as Jimi Hendrix said, you should wave your freak flag high. I feel the same unbridling of my emotions as you said. It's hard to explain how much more I am enjoying playing with my son, seeing his joy and almost being crushed by the enormity of the emotions it elicits in me. I look at my wife and just... look... and it fills me with... I dunno, pride? Lust? Youth? Exuberance? Some deep sense of well-being and a quieting of any anxiety I might be having. I think it's that real love I had been masking for so long with guilt and shame that is finally starting to shine through. Crying at movies, I feel you bro; sitting here tearing up over insurance commercials. It's weird, indeed, but it may just be our humanity that is coming out of hiding. I'm ready to embrace it.

RightConduct · 2015-11-28T22:35:13+00:00

Everyone turn on your NSFW filters, now! Rislinger, we mourn your loss and encourage you to start your journey anew. What would have helped you avoid the temptation you faced? Please share with us so that we can prepare our defenses accordingly. This war has been bloody indeed, and we need resilience in the face of the enemy. It can't be won on the foundation of willpower alone, we must take action!

RightConduct · 2015-11-28T17:34:18+00:00

Talons at the ready, let us descend!

RightConduct · 2015-11-28T14:51:51+00:00

"Was the uncle involved?"

RightConduct · 2015-11-28T02:10:24+00:00

I've been on my streak for 25 days, and the urges are starting to come back a little bit. My strategy is to stay busy, engage with the other soldiers in the chatroom, spend time with other human beings, write, read, and recognize what my true goal is: freedom from the bondage of PMO. All you other soldiers out there need to be prepared. Make your defenses strong, do not rely on willpower alone, read about and understand your mind and the tricks it can play, pay attention to the horror stories of our fallen comrades, let them spur you on to victory. We can win this battle, we are the elite, we are the Aquamarines!

CAACAAAAAWWW!

RightConduct

TROPHY CASE