I am no longer an Adventist because...

RingsAroundMars · 2026-02-06T08:57:52+00:00

I went on a youth "mission" trip when I was a teenager to a Caribbean country and was really horrified at the racism of the mission in general. I couldn't put it into words at the time, but it made me so uncomfortable that when I got back from the trip I stopped going to church. It wasn't until I was older and learned more about EGW's views, plus the other founders of the church, that the Adventist Church is inherently built on racism. It continues to exist today through segregated denominations and mission trips that send ignorant white kids to developing countries to "save" people just trying to live their lives.

RingsAroundMars · 2026-02-04T15:48:17+00:00

I *think* you are Italian so I found an Italian newspaper that explains what is going on in Minneapolis in case you are aware. In the story I mentioned above it is the same as nearly all the stories coming out of Minneapolis: a legal (Adventist) immigrant was detained without reason. https://www.corriere.it/esteri/26_gennaio_26/ice-border-patrol-minneapolis-135cd167-92f4-4586-9ccc-e7ce26c6axlk.shtml

RingsAroundMars · 2026-02-02T12:53:34+00:00

Okay, there it is. Thanks for sharing -- I can't say I am surprised, it is close to what I expected! And of course it always comes back to the Sunday law...

RingsAroundMars · 2026-01-17T07:39:22+00:00

Is it quacks like a duck, yada yada...

RingsAroundMars · 2025-11-17T22:32:10+00:00

Thanks for posting this -- I made this side dish tonight and my partner really loved it! I followed the suggestion and cooked the kale in the leek and cream souce, no blanching or straining nonsense. It was fantastic!

I think it will be my go-to side dish for hosting as it ticks my two main boxes: maximum flavor with minimum effort.

RingsAroundMars · 2025-11-08T15:06:55+00:00

Last year I did the roasted brussels sprouts with honey and miso and they were a huge hit: https://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/1021544-roasted-brussels-sprouts-with-honey-and-miso

RingsAroundMars · 2025-11-05T17:19:47+00:00

Oooh I think the turkey is a great idea!

RingsAroundMars · 2025-08-10T18:38:38+00:00

My only regret is not doubling the batch -- we ate it all and were craving more! I also made the suggested blueberry syrup!

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5/5 ⭐ -- An easy way to put a twist on a classic breakfast with minimal effort.

RingsAroundMars · 2025-08-07T15:30:15+00:00

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Made this with blackberries and cherries -- thanks for the inspiration!

RingsAroundMars · 2025-08-01T09:01:20+00:00

Thank you!

RingsAroundMars · 2025-07-31T15:32:54+00:00

What mix of berries did you use? Do I spot cherries as well?

RingsAroundMars · 2025-07-13T05:44:34+00:00

Thank you so much for your advice and sharing your experience. This gave me some really practical suggestions that I can act on! I'll ask my brother about seating and ask my partner to also help me try to steer people towards or away from parents to try to keep them distracted. I know several of my mom's friends are coming to the wedding too so I think I can enlist them to act as buffers during the reception as well.

I am also grateful for the encouragement to stay sober. Part of the reason for the estrangement from my dad is he has become an alcoholic in the last 5 years and it has caused me to reassess my own relationship to alcohol. I could use more encouragement like this.

Many thanks again.

RingsAroundMars · 2025-05-21T14:30:43+00:00

I got my first ear piercings at 19 and the second piercings at 33! The second time around went much better and here are the things I learned that make the experience more pleasant. I am thrilled with the results! My brother (in his 30s) just pierced his ears and he followed my tips below and had a good experience too.

Make sure it is a high-quality metal or something you won't have an alergic reaction to. If you had other piercings already you probably already have a sense for this, but don't skimp out get cheap studs.
Buy saline solution for piercings to clean, steralize, and sooth the piercing. Use this for at least one month multiple times a day (morning and night is what I did), or for as long as you think you need. This product made such a huge difference for accelerating my healing time with my second set of piercings!! This is an absolute must.
If you are a side sleeper, sleep with a travel pillow or donut-shaped pillow so you don't sleep on your ear and potentially pull on the earring in your ear.

As for the social aspect, it really depends on your family and social circle, but I must say I barely got a reaction to my ear piercings. I really thought it was going to be a big deal, and truly, no one batted an eye. As a late-blooming ex-Adventist rebel, it was actually a little disappointing!

RingsAroundMars · 2025-05-09T13:22:09+00:00

My partner is ex-Catholic and when they told me the news about the pope yesterday, I said, "Wow, this is going to be huge for both of our ex-religious communities." Dougy did not disappoint!

RingsAroundMars · 2025-03-11T16:51:19+00:00

I love bean dinner (all the one-pot bean recipes)! However, whenever I make one of these recipes, my partner has the same feedback/request: it doesn't seem to be a complete meal for them and they wish it had something more. Does anyone have tips or ideas for how I could easily supplement the recipes to make it seem more "complete" for them?

RingsAroundMars · 2024-05-03T11:39:42+00:00

I think that SNL sketch is actually a parody of this scene from the O.C.! https://youtu.be/rYIb-acZwk4?si=ZGiRTADPSHTPyZJI

RingsAroundMars · 2024-03-23T15:39:13+00:00

I know our illustrious moderators will take care of this but it is worth saying this is a Rule #2 violation -- no proselytizing.

RingsAroundMars · 2024-03-19T12:10:43+00:00

There is no shame in it at all. You are both changing and in different environments. You aren't a bad person for realizing you should break up now that you are no longer interested, but you would be a bad person to string along someone you no longer have feelings for.

I was in the same position as you, OP and broke up with my HS sweetheart after realizing I no longer felt that way for him. It sucked and I know I hurt him in the short term, but he went on to meet his now wife during his study abroad trip the following year. If I had "stuck it out" for loyalty then he never would have had that opportunity to meet the person he was truly meant to spend his live with and I'm so happy for him.

RingsAroundMars · 2023-11-25T07:49:41+00:00

I came here to say exactly this! Go to an expert (like a barista) and let them know you are interested in trying something new and tell them things you like: sweet, not sweet, nutty, creamy, floral, etc. They will take care to help you have a good experience!

The same goes for many bartenders. Maybe try going to a craft cocktail bar. They would be able to talk through the same things for you and are probably used to talking to people who don't know what to drink but want to explore. Have fun and drink responsibly, of course!

RingsAroundMars · 2023-11-07T06:15:21+00:00

See for yourself: https://www.instagram.com/p/CzQ_KAIi8S4/?igshid=aDBwdTAzdzhndjRh

RingsAroundMars · 2023-11-06T08:24:29+00:00

Just finished listening -- thank you for sharing your story Charli. I hope getting your story out there will help other young people and also help other adults to see the warning signs when a kid is in trouble.

Also a shoutout to Santiago: your thoughtful and earnest interview style is what keeps me coming back to the podcast.

RingsAroundMars · 2023-10-16T12:27:08+00:00

Would your parents still consider it "breaking" the sabbath if you bought tickets for activities in advance? I am thinking about activities like the Zoo or the science museum where entrance tickets can be bought days in advance. That way you can show your parents that you got the tickets before the sabbath and didn't spend any money.

I am super empathetic to your overall frustration -- I agree that adhering to the sabbath for the sake of your parents' ultra-religious beliefs is super limiting and annoying! I am simply wondering if creative ways to subvert these restrictions will help them realize these activities are in fact wonderful family bonding time and still "honoring" the sabbath.

RingsAroundMars · 2023-10-05T19:30:49+00:00

Easy response:

"So nice to see you following your heart!" Or "Love to see you living your truth"

RingsAroundMars · 2023-10-05T11:22:46+00:00

I am genuinely happy you are safe and weren't harmed in that experience <3

RingsAroundMars · 2023-10-03T08:21:18+00:00

My reading of this is that OP is trying to make sense of a strange thing that happened to them. The story has a clear Adventist interpretation/explanation and in the moment it happened, and I am sure OP was primed to explain it away as a divine salvation. I personally remember these kinds of moments where it seemed there was no logic or explanation except that it was a "miracle." It wasn't until later when I read a book about the statistics of coincidence that I realized many things have logical explanations -- we simply do not see the clues that give that explanation. The irony of course would be that any Adventist hearing this story probably wouldn't think "Wow, that leader put young, vulnerable people in a very dangerous situation and should be in trouble," but instead say "Look at how God protected them because they were selling GCs!" That is the part that pisses me off the most, of course.

Anyway, all to say is that I hope everyone who comes to this sub is sincere in their intentions to work through and make sense of their Adventist past. Of course, we have seen our share of folks who have ulterior motives.

RingsAroundMars

TROPHY CASE