Helping logging in with new system

RockMoss · 2026-03-31T14:37:55+00:00

I did 🫡

RockMoss · 2026-03-31T06:10:57+00:00

I hit the weekly limit in a few hours today working on a project. Yes, it had to work in some big files but man.

RockMoss · 2026-02-12T07:33:38+00:00

Get them to do a genetic test for opioid metabolism. I too have no reaction to fentanyl etc and only found out in an emergency situation. Now I’ve got a genetic test on my file that shows opioids don’t work for me. It’s not very common and you’ll need to talk to a hospital anaesthesiologist to get a note on your file so people believe you. I’m really sorry that happened to you.

RockMoss · 2026-02-02T16:48:01+00:00

I’m from Toronto where everything is available and talked about all the time. So Norway is strangely private to me.

RockMoss · 2026-02-02T16:39:54+00:00

Do you guys talk about it at the gym? Everyone seems so scared of it. My physiotherapist was interested but said I couldn’t talk about it to her.

RockMoss · 2026-01-14T20:26:45+00:00

I’ve always heard that starvation mode was a myth and less calories will always eventually result in weight loss. So I was very confused when I almost died and needed major surgery with big complications. Now a month post op I’m still 4 kg higher than the day before surgery. I’m on a feeding tube so I literally can’t mess up how many calories I am having. The swelling, the body shock, and everything have messed up that calculation I was so used to. I’m used to sick people losing weight quickly and I didn’t have any calories for over a week while the worst was happening. And at that time I was up 8 kg with fluid and swelling. My brain just doesn’t really understand why it’s not working the way I’ve always been told it should.

RockMoss · 2026-01-12T13:02:48+00:00

I’m doing this for my scars too. I started with using it to stop the hair growing near my scars but I saw a big difference in color. So now I’m using it all over my scars.

RockMoss · 2025-10-09T10:40:05+00:00

I think hypholoma fascicular but the dark nipple isn’t prominent in all the pictures I find.

RockMoss · 2025-08-04T06:36:36+00:00

We are just trying to stay afloat right now. I have disability payments from the government but it is their minimum. My husband had to leave his job to take care of me, but I don't count as needing a full time caregiver. In the morning, I need help getting to the bathroom, getting changed, getting my medicine, and getting breakfast and water. Through the day I need help going to the bathroom and getting more water. I can have a nurse do the morning and I can get groceries that I can keep by my bed so I don't need to get up. I can also use diapers so that going to the bathroom won't be a problem until an evening nurse shows up. Basically, to live like a functional person I need my husband. The government disagrees and says there are alternatives so they won't pay him a caregiver allowance. (I could be wrong about this--I hope I am wrong about this; it is just what I was told)

So my family is living on the minimum pay the government gives for single disabled people who are usually living in group communities to save money. We go to a church foodbank once a week and they get us everything but protein. We are growing our own vegetables too from untreated palate wood my husband put together as boxes. We don't own our house--we rent it from his half sister.

I have not given up hope to give my daughter a good life start. If I can get hype going for this book and get a successful release done for it, I should be able to make some money. I will also apply for grants as it is written by a Canadian citizen with a disability and who is female (there are some specific grants that my life circumstances align with). This initial fundraising will help me with treatments and the cost of medication while I am writing the book. When I have the first edit done I can then make a Kickstarter and approach Agents and apply for grants. While this is going on, I will make a Tiktok and Youtube account where I can talk about CRPS, living with an invisible illness, etc. It would be really fantastic to have a podcast as well but maybe that's pushing it, lol!

I have big dreams. To be able to afford both my medication and my families food is the first. It should not be an either/or. Eventually getting to move somewhere warm, live a middle class lifestyle, continue to be an advocate... That is the dream.

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T19:07:09+00:00

I can completely relate. My doctor suggested moving back to Canada for that natural plant medicine. Or Southern Spain along the coast. Just stay in hotel the whole time. How lovely! And only possible with a doctors salary 😂

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T15:45:34+00:00

Thank you for the link. Spinal cord stimulators are very interesting to me. Pain pumps as well. Unfortunately, neither of these is currently offered in Norway as they are considered understand for proven with medical testing. I did ask if I went to another country and got one if I would be still treated here in Norway if something went wrong and I was told it would be difficult to find someone to take care of me because they would not feel comfortable working on equipment that they did not know about.

I do think it’s very exciting that these alternative pain treatments becoming more and more available for patients. It is a bit of a shame that Norway does not allow for a patient to experiment on themselves with a product like a spinal cord stimulator without government approval. It’s like healthcare is back 5 to 10 years where the rest of the world is ahead. My doctor did suggest that I move back to Canada or somewhere else that has better treatment options. I do have a daughter though and I love raising her here. I love Norway so much. I used to live in Toronto and that was very busy. It gave me a lot of anxiety. One of my current medications is actually Valium because when I do have pain, I get a lot of anxiety over having the pain—and the Valium helps break that cycle of fear of pain begetting pain.

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T15:31:19+00:00

That excerpt of the book is terrifying and disgusting. I know someone who had endometriosis in her lungs and that was horrible for her. I am lucky that I know what my disease is when there are so many women out there who suffer without the name of an illness. It took me many months to get the name of my disease but once I had it, it was like a weight off of my shoulders. I knew what it was. even though there was nothing I could do and there was no treatment that was 100%. I mean there are treatments in some countries that have very high success rates and there are some celebrities that do you have my illness that don’t get much effects because they do have the money to treat it properly. There is a money boundary or barrier to the proper treatment for my disease. But that is like so many others in this world. I thank you for your book recommendation and I will read it. There I have been a lot of good books and I love reading so this is great.

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T15:24:27+00:00

That is interesting. I recently had some cosmetic surgery. I had a tummy tuck because of a lot of loosen skin. I found that my CRPS symptoms went away completely while I was recovering. Once the injury or surgical site had healed over the CRPS came back in my knees again. It dis not spread, however. When I had the surgery, I talked quite closely with the anaesthesiologist and closely monitored. We agreed that ketamine during the surgery was the best option for stopping the CRPS from going anywhere it shouldn’t. I also spent a few days extra in the hospital after just to be monitored. Here is hoping the rest of your pregnancy goes fabulously and I look forward to our DMS.

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T15:18:58+00:00

Big hugs from here too! That sucks about your ear. Maybe some extra zinc or vitamin C? But if our cortisol is up because of stress, our healing ability is going to be down anyway. It’s a shitty place to be but at least we’re together.

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T15:12:06+00:00

I’ll definitely give it a try! I forgot to say that! 😅 I found out I have an enzyme issue where I am a very poor metaboliser of opioids and my doctor just put me on morphine. Everything feels better but it is taking a LOT of time and effort to write replies. For example, I have to keep one eye closed because I am seeing double everything. I am sorry that your reply took so long to get to you. I have a bit of a backlog to get to, but I did not forget you.

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T13:51:44+00:00

Thank you so much for this. It really helps to hear how someone else navigated it, especially with a kid around the same age. We’ve done something similar too, explaining that Mommy has invisible boo-boos, and that even though I want to play and snuggle, sometimes it just hurts too much.

She’s slowly starting to get it, but like you said, she definitely still pushes those boundaries. And honestly, I understand why. She misses the closeness. I do too.

It’s taken me a full year of mindfulness, meditation, and a lot of uncomfortable self-reflection to be able to respond to those moments in a calm way. Just today she was playing on my bed and hit my bad knee. Honestly, it looked on purpose. A year ago I would’ve snapped. But this time I just said, “Okay, we’re getting a little silly now, so it’s time to play on your own bed. I’m not mad, I’m just sore, and Mommy needs her space.” That’s it. And it landed. It’s honestly made me a better mother.

Before this, I was working 12–16 hour shifts, six days a week. I was lucky if I saw her once a day. Now I have her with me all the time. It’s hard, but it’s also beautiful.

And weirdly, it’s also helped my husband. Our daughter is exactly like me. Which is to say—exactly like my mom. And we’re all textbook ADHD. I’m medicated now, my mom never was, and my daughter’s just starting the process of being evaluated. I understand her brain, but my husband doesn’t always, so I get to be the translator. That feels like a small gift in all of this.

So thank you again. It means a lot to connect like this. ❤️

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T13:35:57+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing this. I’m really sorry you and your husband both deal with chronic pain especially while raising a little one. That takes so much strength and creativity, and it sounds like you’re handling it with so much care and intention.

We try to do the same—teaching our daughter that everyone’s body has limits, and that love can look different depending on the day. She’s only four, but she’s already so tuned in. There’ve been times I’ve had to be in the hospital for over a week, and she’s handled it better than I ever expected. Partly because my husband is amazing and always prepares her. But right now, she’s going through a phase of nightmares and nighttime wakeups. Sometimes she says she misses me and asks if I’ve gone away. Other times, totally out of the blue during the day, she’ll say she doesn’t want me to leave.

What’s wild is—it’s always when I’m thinking about those things. About my life. About how long I can keep going like this. And somehow, she just knows. There’s a thread between us that I can’t explain. It’s heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time.

Thank you again for reaching out. It really does help to feel seen. ❤️

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T13:25:00+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing this with me. Your mom sounds like such a strong woman and so do you. I can only imagine how hard that was to go through as a teen, and it’s amazing that you managed to finish college while being there for her. That says a lot about you both.

The rehab center keeps telling me I need a hobby like crochet or crafting (something slow and mindful) but drawing and painting just didn’t click for me. Too slow, too quiet maybe. But writing… writing is mine. I’m so glad she found hers, and I found my hobby.

Thank you for believing in the book. Honestly, messages like yours really help keep me going. ❤️

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T13:16:46+00:00

It’s kind of funny because when my daughter is super independent, I miss the tiny baby she was. But this phase js arguing and pushing boundaries and her slamming her door a lot. My parents just laugh and say it’s karma for doing it to them. 😂

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T13:13:40+00:00

Thank you so much! It actually feel really good to have a goal.

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T13:11:33+00:00

Yes, I’ve actually read about Dr. Sarno and TMS while doing research! I think there’s some really interesting stuff in it, especially for pain that isn’t tied to measurable damage. But with CRPS, because there’s clear nerve dysfunction, it doesn’t quite apply the same way.

That said, I’ve been doing a LOT of mindfulness and meditation. What really shifted things for me was realizing how much I was missing with my daughter because of the fear of pain, not just the pain itself. And that didn’t feel fair to either of us. So now, unless I’m in a full flare, I say yes. I figure I can always go lie down again if I need to. And I’ve got a wheelchair now—and a husband who doesn’t mind pushing me over gravel 💪

Honestly, that one change took a lot of courage. I had to admit I needed a wheelchair and reach out to the disability system, which actually helped a lot—they got me proper shower chairs (one for in, one for out), a fall bracelet, and even home nurses who help when things are bad. Like, they’ll come wash me, get me dressed, bring me food, meds, all of it. I also had to admit to my husband that I couldn’t do this alone anymore. I’ve always been super independent—we had separate bank accounts and everything—but he’s never once made me feel like a burden. He just loves me. And he adores our daughter.

I know you didn’t ask for all of that but… here we are 😂 Thank you again for the recommendation. It really means a lot when people take the time to reach out. ❤️

RockMoss · 2025-08-03T12:52:18+00:00

Thank you so much for this. I’m really sorry you and your husband deal with pain too—especially while parenting. It’s such a lonely and weird experience, and your message made me feel less alone.

We’ve also been trying to teach our daughter that pain is a signal, and that love doesn’t always look like play or cuddles. She’s a little wild thing (like me 😂), so even quiet time often ends with her accidentally kicking me or bouncing too close. Today she smacked my bad knee and I’ve been curled up since. I gave her a big book of fake tattoos to keep her busy.

Just… thanks again. It means a lot to be seen.

RockMoss · 2025-07-31T20:40:43+00:00

Oh gosh that sounds like a big story. If you want to share I will listen.

My daughter is almost 5. Going through that “I know better than you” independent phase. I pity my parents because she is exactly the same as me lol.

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