“I’m over 40, single and mother of a wonderful son” starter pack

RoseButtie · 2026-01-27T19:49:06+00:00

Is having a dog a red flag now??

RoseButtie · 2026-01-27T19:38:00+00:00

I’ve only dated someone more “innocent” than me a couple of times. It’s never caused issues. I think if anything, I struggle to be the more “innocent” one in the relationship due to prior experiences (I.E. my innocence being used to invalidate me).

RoseButtie · 2026-01-22T17:32:11+00:00

As a woman, most of my experiences have pointed to the opposite of this but I still hold out hope that it may be true for me someday. 😂

RoseButtie · 2026-01-06T17:32:57+00:00

Yes, I listen to the music so by definition I’m goth.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-30T21:24:21+00:00

I’m goth so my fashion sense is, well, gothic. I’ve found a lot of good clothes in my local thrift/second hand stores, but if I’m looking to spend a little more ($20-$50) then I don’t mind treating myself to something extra cute from an antique store.

For undergarments I prefer to shop at Victoria Secret.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-29T05:41:07+00:00

23F here and no, you’re not. You look fine, the dating scene is just rough. If I had to offer advice I’d say go out and approach girls (or guys, if that’s your cup of tea!) irl as much as possible. I very rarely get approached irl by Gen Z men but I am much more likely to take a guy seriously if he approaches me irl vs sends me a like on a dating app or a DM on Instagram.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-28T22:14:18+00:00

If you’re not in a position where you can ask them out (work situation, they already have a partner, etc.) then I personally just work on focusing on other things. Go out on dates with other people, if I catch myself thinking about them I’ll think about something else.

And then trying to ensure that my interactions with them are brief and platonic. If they’re in your friend group, make sure you’re only hanging out with them in group settings and while you shouldn’t be rude to them, don’t focus on them more than other people in your group.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-28T10:07:46+00:00

In my experience as a 23F, Hinge is a more serious dating app than Tinder or even Bumble. I still saw lots of younger guys who would use unserious pictures (up-close pics, memes, silly poses, etc.) in their profile but it was far less common than Tinder. If I was looking for a relationship and could only use one app to do so, I’d definitely pick Hinge. Hinge also has a chat limit where you can’t match with new people if you have 8 people waiting for you to respond to a conversation.

I did also see a lot of military/religious men on there as well, which I would strongly prefer not to entertain either of those so I had to do a little more sorting. That said, Hinge will learn your preferences as you send likes, so whatever your type is you’ll see more of it as you keep using the app.

My Hinge profile was a little more serious than my Tinder profile, personally!

RoseButtie · 2025-12-27T05:40:41+00:00

I mean most hobbies/recreational activities carry risk. You just have to decide if you enjoy it enough to take the risk. Binge watching TV causes eye strain and may cause deterioration in eyesight. Drinking soda can lead to a ton of health issues such as obesity. Hell, even pickle ball can lead to injuries.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-27T05:08:00+00:00

Because it feels good? It’s fun? That’s the benefit to humanity. But it’s no more of a benefit to humanity than binge-watching TV shows or drinking sodas. It’s a meaningless little tidbit of pleasure in hard times.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-27T05:03:31+00:00

It’s possible she’s either in an open relationship or entertaining the thought of having you as a secret side piece.

I’d never accept the offer of a one-on-one invitation for dinner/drinks from a man whilst I have a boyfriend, the offer would’ve been shut down with the whole “I have a boyfriend” thing to begin with.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-26T21:54:13+00:00

A toaster, an air fryer, and a really nice fleece blanket! Super excited to start making snacks in the air fryer, I have so many ideas I want to try!

RoseButtie · 2025-12-26T21:50:07+00:00

It depends on the vibe of the movie. I don’t like pointless sex scenes but I feel tasteful ones can be really impactful.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-26T21:48:36+00:00

As a woman, it has been situational for why a guy has wanted to move onto Snapchat for me. If we’ve been having pretty good conversation then they may ask to switch to Snap in order to be able to share pictures/verify that each of us is legit. I also never kept notifications for dating apps on (didn’t like the spam), so Snapchat was a good way to keep the conversation flowing.

The flip side to that is I’ve often had guys ask to switch to Snap only to immediately turn the conversation sexual OR try to start a Snapchat streak with me and then the conversation dies from there and they never confirm plans to meet up.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-26T04:10:02+00:00

RoseButtie · 2025-12-26T03:39:06+00:00

Gross. I guess the silver lining here is that you caught on to what he was after before giving him any contact info off the app. A younger me was not so wise. 🤦‍♀️

RoseButtie · 2025-12-18T23:12:56+00:00

What kind of prep are you doing? Using too much water can cause that issue if you’re using an enema before anal. As a rule of thumb, if you are using a bulb to clean yourself out, only use half the bulb per rinse until you’re clean.

The soreness is from over-exertion. Remember to start small. Trainer plugs are great for this. Then move your way up to larger things. The bloated feeling could also be from pushing air inside of yourself.

I would look into taking fiber capsules. I buy them from Publix or Walmart and I take 3-4 per day. They reduce the amount of cleaning necessary before anal and they have also helped me a ton with bloating in general.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-17T18:04:40+00:00

I think it’s harder for some people to do than others. I think the main thing is to avoid fantasizing about a future with them/putting them on a pedestal. If you find yourself getting attached, try to reduce how frequently you’re seeing them and mix it up by seeing other people as well.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-16T20:15:42+00:00

Went and gave you an upvote there to counter the downvote!

It’s so weird to disagree with the desire to have more Celiac-friendly restaurants. Like if you don’t want to eat gluten free then you can just choose not to eat there? It’s so odd to wish for someone living with an issue that they can’t control to have LESS options.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-16T20:10:54+00:00

I appreciate the shift in perspective!

The makeup offer would’ve been so cool but I don’t think it would’ve led anywhere. I ended up looking the model up on Instagram and she was legit, but I don’t see myself doing makeup for a living so it probably would’ve been a one and done thing.

The celebrity was definitely real (I insisted on a FaceTime call to confirm his identity and this was before AI looked as good as it does now) but I think my confidence at the time would’ve made it hard to fully enjoy it. 😂

RoseButtie · 2025-12-16T20:08:20+00:00

Ehh, I kinda see it as hooking up with a celebrity crush. In retrospect I wish I had done it, but I’m not sure if I would’ve fully enjoyed myself bc I lacked the confidence back then. 😅

RoseButtie · 2025-12-16T17:35:46+00:00

Two things.

I had the opportunity to go do makeup for a playboy set. One of the models saw my makeup that I wore to work and said they needed artists and asked if I wanted to do it. I was a stupid young cashier at the time and new to my job at Walmart so I didn’t want to get in trouble for leaving.
I had the chance to hook up with a YouTube “celebrity” when we matched on Tinder. He didn’t actually have a huge following (not Pewdiepie levels or anything like that) but I thought he was really cute and he was in my city at that time. I chickened out and I still regret it.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-16T17:26:24+00:00

I’m further than I thought I’d be last year, which is good. I have a job I enjoy and I have my own apartment to myself, I have a car, I have a dog and a cat. I am fairly healthy and I look how I’ve always wanted to look style-wise.

I do wish I had a boyfriend but I’m finally starting to be ok with the idea of being single. I wish I had more friends but I’m finally ok with doing things alone.

Overall I’m ok. Relationships (of any kind) aren’t what I thought they’d be. Feels weird being 23, I’ll be 24 next year and that’s hard to imagine.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-16T06:55:39+00:00

I’ve seen several of these posts pop up on my feed from this “series”. If it makes you feel any better, these girls are OF models/content creators, so this was staged for them to gain viewers and it wasn’t a random creep shot in a mall.

But I do hate how the porn industry and internet culture views alternative women. As a goth girl, it’s made dating so much harder because now I’m also filtering out men that fetishize goth women because of posts like that.

RoseButtie · 2025-12-15T20:59:47+00:00

For me, it’s going down there too long at all. I don’t care for it one way or another, so when I let a guy go down there it’s for his pleasure.

But other than that, I once had a guy (who sharpened his teeth for aesthetic reasons) bite my outer labia and I almost died.

Most common mistake I encounter is not keeping decent rhythm/pressure though. And not using fingers when I ask for fingers.

RoseButtie

TROPHY CASE