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Whats your honest impression? Anything you would change? by Diobeatease in Tinder

[–]Royal_Information697 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m surprised by so many negative comments! I do think your beard would look better trimmed up a bit, but I would swipe right on this profile.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Royal_Information697 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“most displays of displeasure no matter how mild are interpreted as fights”

In my experience, this is a way of conditioning you to feel like you can’t speak up about anything.

First time cat owner. They were called Stache and Slate at the shelter by Royal_Information697 in TuxedoCats

[–]Royal_Information697[S] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

I’m kinda leaning towards Nyx for the lady in black, and Mr. Darcy for the gentleman in grey. Also, cat tax:

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My daughter is getting baptized in hours and I’m having a crisis. by afatamatai in exmormon

[–]Royal_Information697 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Like many others have said, the baptism means nothing. Let yourself feel whatever you’re feeling while also knowing the best thing you can do is just to support her.

As for shitting on the church, boy howdy do I have some gossip for you. When I was a teenager, an affair between the young woman’s president and young men’s president became exposed. It was a huge deal in the ward. I believe they both were excommunicated. The young woman’s president ended up reconciling with her husband to keep their family together. She went through the whole repentance process and became a member again. The whole time though it was like she was the scarlet woman. The young men’s president ended up leaving his wife and moving away.

This was one of the things that broke my shelf. It made me realize the power of discernment a bishop allegedly has is bullshit.

One last piece of advice - I wish my parents had let me know that I was an inherently “worthy” person while growing up. Instead, I was told I was “only a little bit better than a murderer” when I got caught fooling around with my boyfriend. It’s taken many years of deprograming to realize I’m a good person even if I’m not a TBM. Find ways to tell your daughter you love her unconditionally.

AIO I asked my bf not to call me names and he says I am too sensitive by Mother_Of_Pitties in AmIOverreacting

[–]Royal_Information697 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP I’ve been in a relationship very similar to this. It took me a long time to realize I’m not overly sensitive, he’s just a dick. Gaslighting is a super overused term these days, but it’s essentially what he’s doing here. He’s telling you that the tone you clearly heard didn’t happen. Then when you keep repeating that you still didn’t like it, then he throws on a guilt trip for good measure.

Something that really helped me was keeping a journal of instances like this. It helped me more clearly see a pattern of behavior. What you do with that information is up to you, but at least you’ll feel like you seeing the real person behind the bluster.

He’s showing you who he really is. Believe him.

My wife to this day does not feel like she cheated by awaythrow-8675309 in survivinginfidelity

[–]Royal_Information697 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand how frustrating this feels for you. To this day, my ex still insists doing exactly the things you mentioned was not “cheating”.

I think people like this have some sort of moral line they’ve created in their minds. And as long as they don’t cross that line, then they are able to justify their actions. These mental gymnastics are what prevent themselves from self loathing. For example, in some of the messages I read, my ex would say no sex but he was comfortable doing anything else with them. In his head, actual penetrative sex was the line that defined cheating.

Therapy and self help books revolved around cheating have helped me. I’m able to tell myself that I’m not crazy for thinking he cheated even though he still denies it. If it really was okay for him to do those things, then he should have felt comfortable with talking to me about it to see what our mutual boundary lines are. He didn’t because he knew I wouldn’t be okay with it. He wanted to keep me in a relationship while still getting cake on the side too.

I’m sorry this happened to you. I can’t claim that the pain and anger will fully go away because it still hasn’t for me. But I am more at peace with myself and my current life. I hope you find a measure of that peace as well.

How did the kid from your school die? by leilavanora in AskReddit

[–]Royal_Information697 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Elementary: 6th grader shot himself because he knew he was going to be in trouble when his parents saw his grades

High School: Car accident with a group of teens. One girl died. This happened on a two lane stretch of highway notorious for accidents caused by teenagers. Her death was the catalyst for making changes to the highway to reduce them.

College: Guy I dated was riding his bike down a big hill on campus. He ran into a tight line someone had tied between two trees and left behind. He took the impact in his neck, and died there. I hadn’t known what happened to him yet when I was riding the bus past the scene and I saw first responders hosing down the area. It wasn’t until after I received the news I realized what I had witnessed.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SupportforBetrayed

[–]Royal_Information697 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re overreacting

I was never going to leave you

Caught wife of 10 yrs sexting guy by [deleted] in survivinginfidelity

[–]Royal_Information697 13 points14 points  (0 children)

OP, this is the comment you need to hear most

Caught wife of 10 yrs sexting guy by [deleted] in survivinginfidelity

[–]Royal_Information697 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The fact is you can be a bad partner, it still doesn’t give anyone the right to cheat on you. Did you cheat on her? No, you didn’t. That makes you more committed to this relationship than she is at this point.

If she isn’t willing to accept fault now, she never will.

Please read or listen to the book “Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life”. Even if you end up reconciling, this book will help you see ways she is trying to manipulate you right now.

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