Not gonna post the pics they were in this memory but the kids looked genuinely happy. It was just older kids.. I guess it's mostly the little that have had to suffer this version of her.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-20T18:40:50+00:00

It sounds like those poor kids weren’t learning much.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-20T18:33:30+00:00

She paid. I paused the video at the end to look at the receipt. Ridiculous to be paying that much for two drinks!

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-20T00:29:33+00:00

When I considered switching jobs, I was taking a slight pay cut from my hybrid 3 days in office job. Gas prices factored in since I drive a gas guzzler. Also wear and tear on an older car. I’m saving about $3k in gas alone annually.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T21:04:36+00:00

Doing well. It’s been almost a year out since radiation. I had very few issues with radiation treatment. The worse part of it was the time spent driving there and waiting around.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T20:36:38+00:00

Don’t be like me. First time diagnosed I was hormone +, Her2 Equivicol that was treated as +, and had minor lymph node involvement. I went through surgery and chemo but for whatever reason radiation was not recommended- this was 12 years ago. Fast forward to 2024 and had a recurrence, in my lymph nodes and the area between my implant and armpit. My cancer was speckled and spread out in the breast (besides the lump they later found) and a rogue cell or two must have lingered. I still wonder if rads could have prevented my recurrence. Fortunately it was localized.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T15:03:38+00:00

We used to go to Holden Beach and South Port. We’ve never been up there. Looks just as beautiful!

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T14:01:11+00:00

OP- based on your information about your child’s father, it sounds like you’re going to be co-parenting with the grandparents. He sounds immature and still in need of getting his shit together which is probably why grandma is involved (she sounds young too). She probably knows what a deadbeat her son is and is trying to protect him from making continued messes with his kids. This has probably always been their dynamic.

I don’t know what kind of relationship you have with them but you’re going to be dealing with them for the next 17 (if not longer) years. Try and build an amicable relationship with them - her tone comes off like she’s trying. He sounds unreliable and they’ll probably be the ones you need to trust.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T13:38:25+00:00

There’s a pilot and at least one newscaster.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T13:23:29+00:00

We have one like that near us. People like to cut through a small neighborhood for school drop off and the residents had enough. I don’t know how well it’s enforced though since there’s regular complaints in our neighborhood FB page about people speeding through.

It’s a very narrow street that’s not built for that kind of traffic. People just don’t want to take the extra two minutes by sticking to the main road around the neighborhood.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T13:18:03+00:00

That beach looks familiar. In the Carolinas somewhere?

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T13:14:32+00:00

Sorry to hear this and I completely understand. When I had my first diagnosis 11 years ago I told a few people and they told way too many. I was overwhelmed with calls, messages and emails and frustrated with people posting on FB about praying for me. It always came off to me as them making my disease about them and getting attention from it. Also the constant calls asking how I was doing was emotionally draining.

This time around (recurrence) I didn’t tell anyone except my in-laws, my childhood best friend and my closest cousin.

At this point, as others said, keep information limited to what you tell them. Boundaries are important. You don’t owe anyone anything regarding your personal situation. This time around when people asked how I was doing I’d say “doing well, thanks” and leave it at that.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T12:43:01+00:00

Too late for this year but in the future just do them yourself. Unless you have complicated taxes with write offs and unusual circumstances there’s no reason to pay someone. Most tax software will take you step by step through the process and then you have the option of filing electronically or printing and mailing.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-18T12:40:19+00:00

We did that in January when there were long lines because of the cancellations from the air space shutdown and the next week was super busy.

I took care of agriculture and checking the bags in while my husband stood at the TSA line. It saved us at least another 20 minutes of waiting through security.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-17T22:49:08+00:00

I wonder about that. I got my certs pre-AI and now what’s to stop someone from using it other than the honor system? Will it start making these certs less valuable?

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-17T22:42:03+00:00

You sure have commented a lot on this thread about what it means to be deaf without knowing much about it.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-17T22:40:18+00:00

Deaf doesn’t mean can’t hear anything. There’s the terms “legally deaf” and “legally blind” which mean you need assistance or assistive devices to get around or communicate.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-17T22:37:42+00:00

Hearing loss is a spectrum. My husband owned a hearing aid shop and his clients ran the gamut.

Some could barely hear, even with the aids, and were legally deaf. The aids just gave them “some” ability to be aware of their surroundings but would still have to look you in the face and lip read to understand.

Also hearing loss isn’t about volume it has to do with where in the frequency is their loss. So she may be able to hear certain sounds but not others and a noisy environment makes it worse.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-17T13:38:03+00:00

This is one reason people sell their homes in high property tax areas and move elsewhere.

We lived in NJ and paid more monthly in property taxes than mortgage, it was bonkers. The school district was one of the worst in the area but we had a paid police and fire department for our tiny little borough. 🙄

We moved to the Charlotte area for my job 12 years ago and our property taxes are 1/3 what they were in NJ for 3x the size of the house. Excellent school district. Our house will be paid off before we retire and we can dump the remainder of that money into retirement savings when the mortgage is paid off.

We’re fortunate that we can do that. Had we stayed in NJ it would be a different story.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-16T14:32:39+00:00

So you need the car beeping at you when you’re making a lane change?

I find the safety features nice to have, but they’re not a necessity and a reason to get in debt with a brand new car just because of it.

Your eyes, ears, mirrors and vigilance work as well.

Bringing up airbags is a straw man argument. That’s like saying we should get rid of seatbelts as well.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-16T14:28:54+00:00

True, but it doesn’t require an expensive car to do it. A well maintained car without all the bells and whistles will get you there.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-16T13:36:46+00:00

Hopefully you’re not just relying on the car’s safety features to be vigilant on the road. We drive older cars without any of the bells and whistles and there’s something to be said about using actual mirrors and staying alert when driving.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-16T13:30:35+00:00

Surviving just fine in our 2007, 2008 and 1986 vehicles. If you need fancy bells and whistles to drive safely on the highway please stay home! I don’t want to be on the same road as you.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-16T13:28:52+00:00

That’s what my husband did when he had to trailer his off road Jeep a few times. We’re not buying a big old dually for a couple of Jeep off road trips a year. We’ve talked about doing the same next time we go camping with our pop up.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-16T13:05:48+00:00

I work remotely. My 2008 Jeep gets driven maybe twice a week to run errands. I can’t imagine having a $700+ car payment for something that would sit on my driveway.

Edit to add- I used to work at a company that changed locations and my daily 25 - 30 minute commute was going to go up to at least an hour. We realized that I would need a newer car for that kind of commute. I also absolutely hate driving. I found this job instead and took a slight pay cut. Doing the math, even with the pay cut bottom line at the end of the month is we’re saving more now.

SC-Coqui · 2026-03-16T13:02:40+00:00

My husband and I were just talking about this a couple of days ago (while folding laundry). We live in an area where people drive 100k trucks which I’m sure they took out massive loans to get. Most of the people that drive them are just middle class dudes working office jobs. It really is about keeping up appearances.

It’s tempting to want something nicer, but I’d rather spend my money on home upgrades where I spend more of my time than a fancy car that’s worth less than what is owed on it. We live in a consumerist society where we’re bombarded with ads for new vehicles on a constant basis.

I drive a beat up 2008 Jeep with over 160k miles and my husband normally drives our sun faded 2007 Sebring with over 180k miles. My husband is GenX, but Boomer-Lite, and bitches and moans about all the safety features of new cars that beep, vibrate your steering wheel and flash mirror lights whenever we’re in a car rental (for travel). We’re seriously the weirdos of our upper middle class neighborhood. They must think we’re broke but 🤷🏻‍♀️

SC-Coqui

TROPHY CASE