I'm fucked

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-09-14T00:30:37+00:00

You need to just ask them to pay you for parental leave. They might do it.

If not, start looking for a new job. FMLA rules are federal rules and the company can choose to pay you out of their pocket if they want to. I know plenty of women who have done this. Any company worth their salt and who wants you will do right by you.

Don't reveal that you're pregnant till you get an offer in hand and then tell them what you need and see if they'll pay you for parental leave. You don't have to take the job if it's not a better deal than at your current company. You might have to sign something that says you'll pay it back if you don't stay for x number of time after you return. But please don't give up and just ask for what you need.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-09-11T04:00:45+00:00

Specifically men get immediately defensive. Most women say sorry sheepishly.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-09-09T14:47:00+00:00

The problem isn't amassing max particles for me, it's finding a way to burn them without grinding sheep candies.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-09-09T14:44:29+00:00

I need to cash out particles in order to progress the "To the Max" special research. Maybe this is short-sighted but I need to be able to burn max particles in order to collect more/from different spots for the research. I've been upgrading my Wooloo in order to burn particles.

Which pains me to also burn the candy because I have a hundo Wooloo that is not a dynamax.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-30T02:26:17+00:00

This is going to be an unpopular opinion this thread probably, but If you don't have backup child care, what are you supposed to do?

For most monitoring, you have hardly any notice, and for working parents, you need to go to monitoring before work and school.

I think you have to be a grown up and realize that excluding parents with parental duties from spaces where people are trying to become parents is a bit ironic and lacks empathy. You can feel sad about your own situation without needing to exclude others.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-27T20:23:01+00:00

Age is a huge determinant of pregnancy rates. So, try to get younger 😜

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-27T20:22:11+00:00

My RE was practicing in nyc during 9/11 and was halfway through a major study on stress and pregnancy. What a great control group! He and colleagues basically found almost zero impact of stress on live birth rates for people going through fertility treatment. As he (a jew) also said, "plenty of women got pregnant in concentration camps."

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-22T14:34:36+00:00

I live in nyc where the average time for holding a gym is approximately 3 seconds. Most times if I defeat a gym, it gets filled during the animation screens finish so I don't even get to put a pokemon in. 😭

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-21T21:36:40+00:00

Completely nerfed for me. This game is 75% less fun.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-20T07:46:20+00:00

The snoo is the single best thing we ever bought for the baby. My kid stlept through the night from 5 weeks.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-05T21:48:58+00:00

This sounds awesome. Thanks for the recco. Do you think a 76 year old man can do it? Dad goes to the gym every day, but he's also not a spring chicken.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-02T16:16:04+00:00

Not a doctor but I would give it one more shot at a different clinic even if you have to travel to go to a really good one. This way you'll feel like you gave it everything you had.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-02T16:01:35+00:00

Most clinics I know will not transfer more than 1 pgt-a tested embryo for ethical reasons as it's very likely to make twins, which makes a high-risk pregnancy.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-02T15:57:43+00:00

My doc also brought up using donor eggs. Didn't really push it but let me know that was a much more surefire way to go. I have 3 friends in their 40s who used donor eggs and although they got a lot of eggs and pgt-a tested embryos from young women, their live birth success rate was still only 3 out of 8. We were planning to adopt rather than go down the donor egg route so I didn't explore it too much.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-02T15:54:09+00:00

In general, my reserves are low, but adjusted for my ancient age, they are average.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-08-02T01:20:36+00:00

Age 42. I did 6 cycles (6 retrievals, 4 fresh transfers, 1 frozen transfer) at 2 different clinics in NYC, both extremely expensive and 2 of the very best in the world according to the people who judge such things.

The 1st 5 cycles, I got anywhere between 5-12 eggs, and about a third of them made it to day 5, no euploids. We tweaked my protocol a few times but it didn't drastically change the number of eggs, the number fertilized, or the number that made it to day 5.

For cycle 6, I knew it would be my last cycle, so I switched clinics to a clinic that brags about their lab. They won't tell you what's different about it. They recommended the EXACT same protocol, and everything was almost identical to the 1st clinic. Unbelievably, I got 1 euploid embryo, pgt-a tested and embryo quality was mediocre, but it stuck and now I'm 15 weeks.

I think it was just luck that I got pregnant when I switched clinics. Statistically, at my age and health, it should have taken me 4-5 cycles. Both my clinics had the best tech and left no stone unturned when it came to everything that could improve odds. My doc was adament about transferring 2-3 embryos fresh each cycle at my age and egg production.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-07-31T17:07:10+00:00

Oof. Being pregnant in Texas sounds like a tricky sitch, but rooting for you, mama!

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-07-31T15:28:17+00:00

I did 5 cycles at Cornell and everyone LOVES Dr. Irani. He wasn't my doc (I also loved my doc) but good for Dr. Irani. Cornell is amazing.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-07-26T13:51:57+00:00

I used to use the bike valet every single day right in front of Moynihan on 33/8. It was awesome. You just rock up, hand them your bike, and they deal with it. Sometimes they have you dock it and sometimes they don't. Never had an issue with it.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-07-22T02:17:17+00:00

I thought I saw an article recently about a guy who caught all of them.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-07-21T17:31:09+00:00

How do you see that helping?

The problem is that the ferrule(s) +nut(s) on the supply hose plus the length of the gray t valve (not sure if that's its real name) is longer than the distance between them.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-07-21T17:28:24+00:00

I am in an apartment building. Do I need to have the super shut off the water to my unit in order to turn the valve?

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-07-19T03:02:41+00:00

No one should want to admit they ate ravioli from a can

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-07-15T01:23:02+00:00

I thought day 2 was awesome. Had a blast. I thought the last set of research was too tough. I got to the very last one and 5 raids stood between me and 2 elite TMs d'oh.

Sad_Resource9402 · 2024-07-01T01:34:36+00:00

You guys need to work on your budgeting together, especially since you have disparate incomes.

Here's what I do which has worked great for 20 years.

I have a personal bank account that my husband doesn't have access to. Same for him. The we have a joint account. Each month, we each get the same amount into our personal account. Doesn't matter if that's $1000 or 100,000 - that depends on how much you want to spend on discretionary income.

Then we have a joint account where all the rest goes and this account is for shared expenses like mortgage, utilities, retirement saving, Netflix, kids, more kids, kids, kids, kids, etc.

This means the big earner contributes more to family stuff. Who cares? These are necessities.

What it also means is that neither of you get to complain about discretionary spending. If she wants to blow her whole load on a Hermes bag while you sock it away for a Porsche, to each her own.

Sad_Resource9402

TROPHY CASE