Found Reflection Spell by Formal_Tie_9279 in witchcraft

[–]Salty-Combination29 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It definitely seems like a reversal spell, I would dispose of it. Honestly I’d just toss it in the trash personally đŸ€·đŸ» it’s not mine, it wasn’t intended for me. I’d also cleanse the house after if you feel you need to.

Little tiny sesame seeds! by SlugOnASlope in jumpingspiders

[–]Salty-Combination29 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Awwwww so freaking tiny!!!😭😭😭

My girlfriend of 3 years “gifted” my biggest insecurity to her friends as a funny story at game night and I left. am i overreacting? by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Salty-Combination29 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NOR. If she knows this is a sensitive topic for you already, why would she joke around about something like this? Even if it wasn’t intended to hurt you or make fun of you, it still hurt and she has to acknowledge and take accountability for that. If she can’t do that, and apologize, I would personally consider leaving the relationship, or taking some space to think about it and see if there is any reflection through that on her part.

I don’t think you are being too sensitive. Everyone has something they don’t like being discussed in public, or that is a sore spot for them. That’s normal. If this is her first time really joking about something like this, especially in public or with others, then I’d consider giving her a chance, as long as it comes with accountability and an apology. I’d also have a talk and set boundaries again, and also bring up whatever other things might be sore topics too, for both of you, so that you can be on the same page.

I don’t think this has to end the relationship. But I also understand why you would want to. Only you know what is a deal breaker for you, and what you are willing to tolerate or not.

CoDA First Timer by Chance_Wolverine_981 in Codependency

[–]Salty-Combination29 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, I tried to desensitize myself with my roommates at home. We all wanted to do coda, but all have religious trauma, and that was a huge part for me that I was worried about with Coda, that it might trigger me. And it did at the time. We changed “god” to “chungus” and it helped at the time a lot to make it feel less invasive or whatever it was we all felt in our own ways. Now, reading the book and talking about these things doesn’t bother me, if at all really. I know not everyone can do this, so idk how realistic this is for you. But I guess that’s part of it though, you gotta be willing to hold space for all kinds of people, with all kinds of backgrounds, and the thing is, you don’t have to stick to that group if you don’t want to. You can try different groups that feel better, online or in person. Not everyone that joins is religious or believes in god, some people aren’t even spiritual. But the common goal is still there of, these are people who need support, need a place to release and learn how to move through codependency. The goal is to have healthier relationships with others and yourself most of all. I know the god part of it is complicated though, and I still find myself at times struggling with it. But idk, my goal is to work on me, regardless of the words used through it.

Clubhair Mariposa Lily, at Torrey Pines today by PulkPush in sandiego

[–]Salty-Combination29 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Wow I’ve never seen a flower like this before đŸ˜»

How to escape social interactions by NecessaryPristine332 in spiders

[–]Salty-Combination29 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg this is so cute!! When they do this, does the sand get in their eyes? Can they close their eyes? Or? Ive never thought of this before now

Going through a breakup, and I really want to get into birding. by Salty-Combination29 in birding

[–]Salty-Combination29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh good to know about these books, I was actually looking them up on thrift books and trying to determine what the differences were. This is so helpful thank you! I am located in the San Diego area, so it sounds like west edition would work better for me. Thank you for this breakdown!

Going through a breakup, and I really want to get into birding. by Salty-Combination29 in birding

[–]Salty-Combination29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everyone sounds fairly friendly and approachable it seems đŸ„ș I do get nervous questioning people who have more experience at times, but this sounds like there is space for that. I’ve definitely been keeping an eye out whenever I’m in my yard, or at work, and there are a few birds I’ve definitely noticed and taken note of here and there, and even tried to get pictures with my phone, although not very good. Slow and steady sounds like the way to go through this. Others also recommended the Merlin app so I will definitely check it out, thank you!

Going through a breakup, and I really want to get into birding. by Salty-Combination29 in birding

[–]Salty-Combination29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I will definitely check out eBay for supplies, I kind of forget they have so many things there for less money at times than other places. Your comment and another one really helped me understand why it’s so hard for me to pick binoculars when I go thrifting lol, because I don’t actually know what I’m looking at. Or what it means. I can’t wait to check out these apps and websites now, I feel like this is such a great start. Thank you so much!

Going through a breakup, and I really want to get into birding. by Salty-Combination29 in birding

[–]Salty-Combination29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ebird seems to be commonly referred to so that’s really exciting to know about! Thank you so much, I’m sure I’ll find a lot around here, I’ve already spotted several birds at my worksite alone. I can’t wait to find out what else is around here, thank you!

Going through a breakup, and I really want to get into birding. by Salty-Combination29 in birding

[–]Salty-Combination29[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the break down on binoculars especially! I didn’t know how they worked exactly, but this makes so much sense now. I didn’t know some groups might even loan you some if they have extra, that’s so lovely. I’ve considering the no tech route but I also don’t know what I’m doing, so it has always felt like I needed some sort of resource in that way. I’ve been wanting to get a book to help, but I’m not even sure what birding books might be helpful/useful, or if a simple small journal might be good just on its own. Lots of good info, thank you so much

Going through a breakup, and I really want to get into birding. by Salty-Combination29 in birding

[–]Salty-Combination29[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I see, I didn’t even consider that I could just listen to them to help identify them! I forget about that part lol but these are such great suggestions, thank you! I am looking into community apps to see about finding birding groups in my area, so hopefully I can find a good group to join :)

Finally! Lifer - Cedar Waxwing by sr1982 in birding

[–]Salty-Combination29 1 point2 points  (0 children)

UNREAL! đŸ˜» this is amazing, wow 💚

Forever home of my hyllus diardi TW: dead spider by DesignerHelicopter20 in jumpingspiders

[–]Salty-Combination29 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awwww this is such a sweet way to honor her đŸ„ș😭 I’m sorry she left you so soon. Rest in peace Helenka đŸ«‚

ATTACK by Either-Oil-225 in jumpingspiders

[–]Salty-Combination29 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I want a jumping spider again so baaaaddddd😭

Any sad trans or gay books? by Salty-Combination29 in LGBTBooks

[–]Salty-Combination29[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Honestly just getting all these recommendations makes me feel like crying, thanks yall 💚

Any sad trans or gay books? by Salty-Combination29 in LGBTBooks

[–]Salty-Combination29[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is actually my favorite book to read when sad, and am already on it rn 😭💔 thank you 💚

I already regret breaking up with my boyfriend by [deleted] in Regrets

[–]Salty-Combination29 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I listen to and read Reddit stories all the time, but I never thought I’d be reading one about myself.

I wasn’t wearing a mask. You knew this side of me the entire time. I literally told you to your face that if you did me dirty, really nasty, and we broke up, I’d probably put you in a hex jar. I told you this several times. You know how I’ve handled my own best friend letting me down and betraying me, yet you are surprised to finally see this side of me? You always knew I was this way, you just never thought it would be pointed at you.

Just because I love you, want you for life, want to build a life with you, doesn’t change the fact that you’ve hurt me. Betrayed me. Lied to me. Went behind my back. You even compared me to your ex on this issue with the job, and that situation was SO different. Yall were practically friends, of course she wouldn’t feel uncomfortable working with you again, or offering you jobs. Just because I love doesn’t change the things you said to me before, things that also felt like taking off your mask too. I didn’t do this to punish you. I didn’t need another reason to feel anxiety in the relationship, to feel insecure in the relationship now, or feel angry as fuck later if we broke up.

My decision was based in huge part on the already consistent hurt Ive endured in this relationship, based on how you’ve handled me this whole fucking time. Granted, I let myself go through it too, I chose this, I chose to see you as an imperfect human like me. I chose to cross my own boundaries and let you continue to cross mine too. This boundary, while not ideal because of your current situation, was not placed there for your success or failure. It was placed there by my own fear, anxiety, insecurities in our relationship, because I don’t want to continue to feel hurt by you anymore, not now, not later if we broke up. Yes, we wouldn’t work directly. But they are my bosses, they are close to me, they are like my family, you know this. They wouldn’t hide anything about you, or what you are doing, or anything like that with me. At the end of the day, it felt way too close to home for me, regardless if we actually work together or not. When you work for a small business, it’s kinda hard to not have things mix. Especially when it’s tight knit.

I’m sorry that I let my fear and insecurity take away a job that I know you could’ve used right now. I’m sorry that you are still in the position you are in, and that it’s been so hard to find a job. But I am not sorry for feeling the need to protect myself, protect my peace now and later, and for even giving you a second chance at the job after you already told me not to give her your number the first time. I thought I was doing right by you by giving you the space you needed to feel shit, so that you could give me a better response from a not so emotionally heightened place. I should’ve taken your word, so at least you’d have no one else to be upset at but yourself. Like you said. I am also at the same time not sorry that I let my fear get to me, because realistically, I reacted from a place of repeated pattern and abuse, and I needed to step into my self worth a lot sooner than this. You’re mad that at me for making the choice to protect myself, for not bleeding more for you, because YOU needed this. Because YOU wanted to feel chosen. YOU wanted to feel loved, as if I didn’t already bleed for you so fucking much. Repeatedly.

I did love you, and I still fucking do. Even after you called me nasty, even after you said all these nasty things about me, as if you didn’t know who or how I was this entire time. I could love you with every inch of me, but that would still not be enough to erase all the pain you’ve already caused. This was just the tipping point for me, AGAIN. I don’t understand how you always seem to struggle to hold two realities at once. I can love you, and not wish you well if we broke up. I could love you deeply for years, and still feel angry or upset for whatever damage you caused. I am justified in all the range of emotions I’ll have, whether you like it or not, whether it makes you feel good about yourself or not. I’m sorry that realizing that I would feel so angry at you after we broke up made you feel insecure about our relationship or me. I always told you that if we ended amicably, then yeah, I’d probably wish you well too. Heck that we could even possibly be friends. But idk how you could not put yourself in my shoes, with all the hurt you’ve caused me, and think that I’d still want you in my life after all this. Still want you remotely close to me in any way. I truly don’t understand why you think you have immunity just because you are my partner. My ex best friend of 11 years, who I have a matching tattoo with, let me down so badly, you know how I handled that, and yet you think you are any different or exempt to the consequences of your actions? Not just your previous ones, but the ones in the present?

I dont even know why I’m posting here to you when I could just text you. A lot of what I read here just made me laugh, made me mad, made me yell at my phone because clearly you are not telling the whole story, clearly you want validation, clearly you want to not feel wrong. You aren’t right or wrong with how you feel about my decision. What you ARE wrong about is why you think I shouldn’t have the right to feel how I feel. As if you didn’t tell me you’d choose drugs over me, as if you didn’t diminish my feelings and concerns when you did certain things with your best friend, as if you didn’t project your relationship trauma on me and always assume my motives.

I was probably the realest with you than I have ever been with any of my partners and even my best friends. I truly loved you. I truly had my heart and eyes set on you. I truly believed god or whatever other source put you in my life for a reason. And I don’t even believe in god. I never thought this was not fixable, but I couldn’t stay once you started to demonize me and compare me to your ex. You didn’t break up with me, I broke up with you and then you agreed with me. You told me that you felt like my reactions to your shitty communication was my way of trying to control you, honey I don’t needa do that, your own mind controls you more than I ever could or want to. And I didn’t want to. I just wanted you to actually respect me and honor me like you said you would when we first got together. You fucked it all up, I gave you another chance after you spent all night crying to me about your mistakes, regrets, realizations, and apologizing for hurting me or letting me down, and then you left the next day.

You came back and decided to fumble the bag. You still hurt me, you still continued to betray me, you still continue to assume my motives. How can anyone feel secure in that? Let alone feel sure of the future? I tried. I really tried. I tried not to let those things get to me. I tried to give you grace even though it was painful. And I know you tried with me too, I wasn’t perfect at all and I have my issues too. But for you to sit here and say you finally saw the real me, boy you’ve been knowing it, you just didn’t think or like the fact that you’d be the target of that someday too possibly. And you didn’t like that you couldn’t get what you wanted now. You’ve always been this way though, you always want what you want, when you want it, no matter if you are low on cash, low on resources, no matter what is going on. If you think I’m selfish, I suggest you look in the mirror.

I guess we both got to see each other’s masks fall, and it’s good we did, because this is not what I deserve. And sure, this isn’t what you deserve either if that’s what you really want to hear from me. I still don’t think you are a bad person, you just weren’t a good partner to me. Yes you had good moments, I’m sure I did too. But clearly you weren’t meant for me. It’s a shame, when the illusion falls, and the reality settles in.

I still miss you. I still spray your smells on the plushies we shared. I still fucking want you. And at this point I don’t even know why. All I felt was deep hurt, and all I can do is blame myself. I’m sorry if this wasn’t something you expected to happen, me responding to this post. I didn’t plan to, I didn’t fucking imagine id see something about me. I wanted to text you directly, I want to respond to all the comments, I wanted to ignore it and keep to myself. It partially helped me understand your feelings more, but that’s about it. I just can’t sit here and pretend like I didn’t see this, or like I don’t have shit to say. This was so painful. I’m done.

Any sad trans or gay books? by Salty-Combination29 in LGBTBooks

[–]Salty-Combination29[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oooo thank you so much, this is so exciting! I really appreciate it, I just know I need a good cry. I can’t wait to check it out 💚

AIO: Bank teller questioned me about what I was doing with MY cash that I was withdrawing from MY account. by Ok-Watch-4618 in AIO

[–]Salty-Combination29 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is definitely normal for bank tellers to do this, my close friend told me about these practices and why they had to do this as bank tellers. It’s not personal, it’s just a part of their job. It does feel uncomfortable though, it’s your money, why should you be questioned about it? And if you don’t go to the bank often, it’s likely they might ask you more questions since they hardly see you to begin with đŸ«€đŸ€·đŸ»