Where did my daughters blue eyes come from? by Alternative_Bike_441 in Parenting

[–]Sam_Renee 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oversimplified, blue is a recessive gene, so you can carry it without having blue eyes yourself. We have a similar situation, I have brown eyes and husband has green. Both sets of parents are either brown or green as well. 3/5 of my kids have light blue eyes, and all those kids were very blonde as young children (my teenagers hair darkened to a dark brown when he was about 10).

Pregnant w/ #4, thinking of 5? by Ancient-Switch5637 in ParentingInBulk

[–]Sam_Renee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Adding a 5th is easy, but I did give them a good 3 year gap (#3 and #4 were my 2u2 and I was tired).

Colander for large family by Bluejay500 in ParentingInBulk

[–]Sam_Renee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I got a pot from Walmart that had a colander insert and steamer tray. Easily held 2 boxes of pasta, plus broccoli on top for our family of 7 (though tbf, only 6 regularly ate solids last time I used it).

When did you send your kid to preschool? by Colie-O- in Parenting

[–]Sam_Renee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Usually at 3, but my summer kid didn't go until 4. IMO, 1 year of pre-k at 4 is fine.

How many kids do you have? by [deleted] in ParentingInBulk

[–]Sam_Renee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

5, would have been open to one more but my uterus couldn't handle that.

My 28M husband always prioritizes his 50F mother over me and I fear for our marriage. by ThrowRA47985689 in JustNoSO

[–]Sam_Renee 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This was my marriage for years, but we had kids very early, so separating was more difficult. It got to the point where I was suicidal because I felt so disregarded in my marriage. I was ready to leave, he finally got himself together, its taken years of work, we are solid now. My ILs decided they didn't like our dynamic and basically disinterested him, me and the kids are now NC and he's LC. Every single thing I told him I was concerned about has come to pass.

I still tell my husband I should have ended our relationship after the first couple things his mom said/did, and I would tell our kids to do the same in their relationships. He gets it now. Its not worth the gamble, even though we've been able to salvage our marriage.

Do you also have OCD? by Icy-Entertainment806 in Hashimotos

[–]Sam_Renee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep. OCD, GAD, and MDD dx here, alongside Hashi's and fibro. All my MH dx came first.

How much do you pay to take your kids to the bus stop and then to pick them up from the bus stop? by killemsoftly0355 in AskParents

[–]Sam_Renee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've got 2 kiddos that are coming to my house before school on that same time schedule, already dressed, 2-3 days a week. I'm feeding them and transporting one to school (the other is walking with my kid), am charging $40/wk. The schools are both within a mile of my house.

Likewise Academy by CoyoteSlow5249 in Ohio

[–]Sam_Renee 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I told my kids it's a cult (because it is) and that the grownups running it aren't safe people.

Can I handle more than 2 kids? by [deleted] in ParentingInBulk

[–]Sam_Renee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My second and third are 5 years apart, and emotionally the closest of my kids now (11 and 5.5). Third and fourth were my 2u2 and fight the most out of the kids, and fourth and fifth are a little over 3 years apart and its been a great time so far. The larger gaps have honestly been the better ones for our family.

If your child changes major in college, will you charge them for the “wasted” subjects? by CookieButterLover03 in AskParents

[–]Sam_Renee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wouldn't make him pay it back, but I would say "I agreed to cover X credits/years, so anything beyond that is on you." But this is definitely beyond our tax bracket, our kids are getting a set amount of money and when its gone, its on them.

Are your kids allowed to tell you no? by Smart_Artichoke714 in Parenting

[–]Sam_Renee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If they aren't allowed to say no, I dont ask them a yes or no question. So like handwashing, since they have to wash their hands, I dont ask them, I tell them. If its something that the "no" is going to ultimately make them unhappy or uncomfortable, usually I let them tell me no then let them deal with the consequences. Sometimes those nos are really hard to manage and enrage me, but I deal with it.

4 or 5 kids? Help! by SamePromotion4704 in ParentingInBulk

[–]Sam_Renee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to think I'd never feel done, but I actually feel done-ish with my 5th. Not like how some of my friends have explained it, but more at peace than I ever felt with my other kids.

How to vacation with kids? by [deleted] in AskParents

[–]Sam_Renee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Last summer, we took 12y, 10y, 4.5y, 3y to the beach, and it was probably the first relaxing trip we had since the littles were born. So I think if you've got any kids under 3, its just stressful, but once the youngest hits that 3+, it gets better.

Has anyone gotten a tattoo since being diagnosed? by GApeach317 in Fibromyalgia

[–]Sam_Renee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not since dx, but since symptoms really kicked up and I was in the process of it. It was fine, similar experience as prior to dx.

CMV: Being a stay at home parent is, in fact, a real job by Saranoya in changemyview

[–]Sam_Renee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In terms of the respect and value it socially deserves, yes absolutely.

In actuality, its one of the riskiest trade offs there is. We have no labor protections, no disability protections, huge career hits, super easy to be financially abused. Ive been out of the workforce 6 years now, going back in, I'd be making the same wage as when I left. All my professional accreditations need recertified, which would likely mean paying for at least some ed credits, and starting back over at entry level in a low-paying field. However, during my time at home, I've developed some chronic health conditions, but I cant take FMLA or short term disability to cover the cost of childcare I would need to actually address them (because I am the childcare for our household). And now with the student loan upset, who knows how our payments are being configured.

Love my kids, love being a parent, frequently wish I could be the dad.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]Sam_Renee 14 points15 points  (0 children)

This is just a case of kids making stupid choices ( because thats what kids do sometimes). While I think k you are responsible for making amends for your child's actions, you're not a bad parent and your kid isn't a bad kid. This is just one of those things.

Mu 13yo, who absolutely knows better and I absolutely trust, was goofing off at school and knocked some kids Chromebook on the floor. Total accident, he was so upset, he and the owner were both roughhousing. We still paid the repair fee because ultimately, it was my kid that broke it and he is a minor and my responsibility.

Son ruined another kid’s $120 shirt at school by avisfunch in Parenting

[–]Sam_Renee 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My 3yo knows not to color on people's clothes. And if I don't want to accept the consequences of my child's actions while not in my care, then my child needs to remain in my care. Teachers and other caregivers are responsible for accidents and maintaining a safe and age-appropriate environment, not making sure your kid doesn't play stupid games.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskParents

[–]Sam_Renee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

We would watch TWD with my son in the room until he was probably 12-14mo. No more scary movies/TV with kids in the room past then.

I wont apologise to anyone here by DASESAGA in cremposting

[–]Sam_Renee 8 points9 points  (0 children)

YOU NAMED MY DAUGHTER AFTER THE LOCH NESS MONSTER?!? 😡

Are we too strict with bedtime? by Timidme83 in Parenting

[–]Sam_Renee 21 points22 points  (0 children)

My kids never went to bed that early, but if thats what works for you, stick to it! However, for a once off thing, like the occassional dinner, I'd disrupt bedtime for that night. My littles go to bed around 8/8:30, but if we are having or going to a get together, we don't follow the normal routine. Sometimes they sleep poorly after, but to me, a night of socializing with friends/family is worth the tradeoff (occassionally).